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Unsure if this is the right place to ask for help..

(10 Posts)
shanelle5 Wed 19-Mar-14 22:13:06

But am desperate so will try and if not hope someone points me in the right direction if its a different thread.

My DD, who is almost 15 has developed psychotic depression and Im struggling to cope even though its only been a week! She is hearing voices, self harming and very distressed.
She cannot be alone and is with me 24/7 including sleeping in bed with me. Im a single Mum of 4 one of whom is a baby, and I don't have any support. I don't know how best to help her and when the voices are telling her to kill herself and me I am feeling very anxious to say the least. Is there any support groups for parents anyone can tell me about? Respite care in the future? (obviously not yet, she needs her Mum and wont leave my side)
Its all happened so quickly and a few weeks ago she was at school doing GCSE, now she has endless appointments, tests, meds and therapy its like a living nightmare for her, and I want to be the best, supportive and helpful parent I can be but feel I need a bit of support too, its having such an impact on the whole family..

ColouringInQueen Wed 19-Mar-14 23:09:52

Hi shanelle I didn't want to leave you without any response tonight. Wanted to say that I really feel for you - your situation with your DD sounds really tough, especially with other children to look after. I'm hoping someone more knowledgeable comes along with advice on the support side - I'm not sure how it works... Have you asked her GP? do you still have a health visitor? Does your DD have a cpn (psychiatric nurse) or anyone monitoring her? Or maybe someone like Mind or Rethink could advise you re: support.

You're completely right that you need support - its very hard taking care of someone with a mental health prob.

I guess you could also try posting in teenagers section too?

Anyhow wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you and really hope you find some support for you and effective treatment and support for your DD. take care.

shanelle5 Thu 20-Mar-14 06:39:47

Thank you so much for replying colouring Yes she must have a cpn, but am unsure of all the correct names/jobs of each person yet.
I think Ill ask when they phone me to check tomorrow how her med's are going on the initial low, starting point.
I will just have to move away from her to take the call as I don't want her to hear me say I'm finding it hard, she keeps saying she is a burden as it is, and that we'd all be better off without her so I am very much being bright and breezy on the outside but each day feeling the strain a little more!
If anyone else could advise, Id be so grateful. Also, if there is anybody who hears voices and would be kind enough to advise on what helps as she is particularly struggling with this and finding it hard to even hold a conversation. I don't know how best to help and all my suggestions seem patronising and/or have not worked. I just feel out of my depth sad blush

FlippertyGibbert Thu 20-Mar-14 07:00:11

Is it worth ringing the school health nurse/advisor - school will have the number - she may have some advice or support, also if you have a little one - is it worth giving your HV a call she might be able to support you- thinking of you.

Pudtat Thu 20-Mar-14 07:11:10

Bumping this for you. Hope you can access the support you need soon.

nicklenackle Thu 20-Mar-14 14:56:06

Sorry if this sounds a bit abrupt but I'm on my phone as I'm currently in hospital recovering from a psychotic episode. I hear voices and the things which help me the most are listening to music through headphones, counting in my head in 3s or 7s (anything complicated) and reading out loud - these things all interfere with the voices. Talking about what they say can be helpful as it removes some of their power but can also be distressing. I am so sorry your daughter is going through this - I was diagnosed at 18, I'm 36 now and still have a horrendous time when I have an episode.

The main advice I would give is to push for input from an early intervention for psychosis service - there may be one connected to your local psychology dept. Push for help and don't be afraid if your dd needs to be in hospital - it can really help. If I had had early intervention at 18 I think my outcome would have been better.

I hope this little bit of advice helps.

shanelle5 Thu 20-Mar-14 15:29:27

Thankyou again.. Particularly nickle I really appreciate your input.

I totally hear what you are saying re talking about what they say, as she says they have got worse since she told me and were/are angry that she speaks about them. I will ask tomorrow if what she is on is the early intervention for psychosis, if not Ill push for it.

flipperty I have spoken to the school nurse, who is also pastoral care but they have made me feel almost embarrassed by my Daughter and her illness, suggesting we keep it hush hush and being "concerned" that she has been speaking about it where other students may hear, they seem keen to keep it under wraps. This attitude is not helpful to my DD or me!

They are also pushing for me to day exactly how long she will be off school as they are already concerned about their league tables! sad

sleepthedream Thu 20-Mar-14 17:22:53

Sorry to hear about what's happening for your daughter & yourself. The Hearing Voices Network may be able to help, information is available on their website. Best wishes for getting the support you need.

IloveJudgeJudy Mon 24-Mar-14 16:59:15

DD has the voices. She finds listening to music without any lyrics helps her. She has also just been visited by Early Intervention today - not her normal counsellor. The lady was very helpful and suggested noticing your breath; concentrating on a sound in your environment - a ticking clock, a bird, the traffic...; concentrating on doing practical things like making a cup of tea and really concentrating on each specific step such as taking the kettle off the stand, opening the lid, taking it over to the sink, turning on the tap... (you get the idea).

I really sympathise. DD was in my constant care for 13 days before she went into an adolescent unit for three weeks. I'm not sure now if the unit did her much good, but it did keep her safe.

shanelle5 Mon 24-Mar-14 20:14:32

Thank you for your reply judy I really appreciate it, been checking back frequently hoping someone may have anything to add. Can I ask how old your DD is? I have been phoning round today trying to get help for myself and DD but its just been pass the buck and dead ends. I need her to be on CPA (care programme approach) in order to get a carers assessment but SS dont do it and CAHMS told me they did so I dont know where to turn next for help sadYour advice on what helps your DD sounds good, I will let mine know. Early intervention sounds as if it is a very good thing to be on xx

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