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DD saw school psychologist for grief counselling & he was useless

(3 Posts)
Megbeth Sat 08-Mar-14 14:25:14

I am not in the UK & this is the only free service we can access. Any other service is with a Drs referral but sessions are very expensive.
DD aged 8 lost her grandfather tragically a few months ago.
Since then she is scared of the dark, is anxious & cries as she misses her grandad.
The psychologist just told her to put her two fingers together & count to 3 breathing in & out. He said he couldn't do anything about her grandfather passing, she just had to look at photos to remember him. We had a 5 min session so was a waste of time. I don't know what else to do to help her. Are there any books anyone can suggest?

StuntBottom Sat 08-Mar-14 14:33:16

Part of the distress of children's grief is the feeling of being out of control. There are a few things you can do to make her feel more in control of the experience. Let her choose a picture of her grandad and buy a photo frame to put it in so she can have it in her room. Build up a memory box with things that remind her of him. Make sure she knows it's okay to cry and let her see you cry if you do - it will help her to understand that grief is a normal, though painful, process and adults go through it too.

There are a couple of picture books that are useful. She's might be a little on the old side but I think she would still find them useful. One is called Badger's Parting Gifts and the other Always and Forever. You can get them on Amazon.

The fear of the dark will probably pass but, until it does, get her a nightlight.

It's tough to see children grieve but it is a part of life and she will grow up to be a stronger person because of it.

Megbeth Sun 09-Mar-14 01:50:49

Thank you Stunt bottom that's great advice. We did a photo for both mt girls that they have in their rooms. I have been putting a lamp on outside her room so it's not so dark down that end of the house.
I will have a look for the books. Thanks

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