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What's the difference between feeling low/bored/lonely and being depressed?

(9 Posts)
Breakage Mon 03-Mar-14 09:42:50

I feel like I need a good shake.

I have a nice life, well behaved, healthy children, good DH, no financial worries and a PT job that is just demanding enough to be interesting without ever causing what you could call stress. A handful of good friends and a sporting interest that gives me a decent social life.

However, I just feel a bit sad. I'm having trouble applying myself to anything, feel unreasonably tired and put off doing things that I know would make me feel better once they were done. I do what needs doing but I can't make myself do anything else. I can't remember the last time I lost control with laughter.

juneau Mon 03-Mar-14 09:50:55

Depression is a chemical imbalance in your brain. My sister is a depressive and when she's 'down' she can't think straight, is irrational, feels suicidal, is very hard to around because she's so endlessly negative and gloomy, listless, sleeps a lot, completely lacks any motivation to do anything, can't cope with social situations, avoids everyone and holes up for weeks without making contact. She manages to hold down a job, however, and can put on a 'front' when around her colleagues.

You just sound bored and a bit down. Have you had your iron and hormone levels checked recently?

LastingLight Mon 03-Mar-14 10:59:52

I agree with juneua that your first step must be a thorough medical checkup as there are physical problems that can lead to depressive symptoms.

There is a form of chronic, low-grade depression called dysthymia, which can and should be treated. See if this rings any bells for you:

In order to meet criteria for the diagnosis of dysthymia, a person must experience depression most of every day, more days than not for at least two years in a row in adults and one year for children and teens. The dysthymia sufferer will not have more than a two-month symptom-free period during the course of the illness and must experience at least two of the following signs and symptoms of this type of depression:

Low appetite or overeating
Trouble sleeping or excessive sleeping
Low self-esteem
Trouble concentrating or making decisions

Seminyak Tue 04-Mar-14 17:05:36

Oh my god. This is me. I was going to start my own thread but this is me. I wake up every morning with such a sense of boredom and dread, but I am happy at least once every day, I know I have such an amazing life. I am so lucky. But I just feel so bored/unfulfilled/sad. No kids yet, I feel they will give me purpose and direction, but I really don't want to have kids just because I'm bored. That would be a mistake.

I literally have everything I have ever wanted (other than kids) so why the fuck am I so miserable all the time? I feel so ungrateful. I've had this feeling my whole adult life, probably since I was 18 which is 6 years ago, so it's not just because currently I'm out of work (although I think the routine of a working day will help).

I get bored very very easily so am always finding new things to do. I fill my days. I cope a lot better with life if I have lots of things on my plate, but I'm always sad under the surface. WHY??!!

My mum and my sister have both been on antidepressants. I think I have a degree of social anxiety - I always worry what to say to people, even if DH and I are going on a date I worry I'll have nothing to talk about. I hate parties and social events, but go anyway because it don't want to be a recluse. I worry about what to chat about with my parents and best friend. Oh I don't know. People have real problems and I am just whingeing about feeling a bit sad every day. Ugh.

Sorry to hijack breakage but maybe this thread can help us both?


Seminyak Tue 04-Mar-14 17:08:36

And yes Lastinglight I

Sleep a lot
Feel hopeless
Am quite indecisive

But for a chunky lady I have quite good self esteem smile

Sooooo what now?

Sillylass79 Tue 04-Mar-14 17:17:04

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LastingLight Tue 04-Mar-14 19:45:44

Seminyak there is nothing wrong with looking at your life and thinking that on the face of it things seem perfect but you know that it's not as good as it can be. Have you considered some counselling? I can also recommend volunteering. It gives you a purpose, helps someone, makes you feel good about yourself and places your life in perspective.

JennyCliff Tue 04-Mar-14 20:13:26

I came on here to write a post almost identical to yours. Totally, agree with Sillylass79, depression is way more complicated than a chemical imbalance, in fact the chemical imbalance theory is pretty much debunked now.

Depression is a fairly universal condition and can be extremely complex. Visit your GP but avoid medication if you some research on this before you swallow anything.

Get out into the outdoors, think about what you could possibly be down you feel alone, trapped, unfulfilled?

Best of luck to you.

Seminyak Tue 04-Mar-14 21:19:14

I've arranged to start volunteering at a local primary school, just waiting for my CRB clearance, so that'll be good.

I'll definitely do some research and look into counselling as I don't feel it's a big enough issue for a GP visit / they'd think I'm making a fuss over nothing x

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