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Thoughts on how to help

(2 Posts)
foreverondiet Mon 17-Feb-14 20:46:14

I bumped into an acquaintance. Not someone I know that well but she was a close friend of my younger sister when they were younger. She told me her marriage had broken down with the revelation that her STBXH has been sleeping around for many years, finding the women on a dating site designed for singles, she claims he has a sex addiction. 13 years and 3 kids, aged 10, 4 and 2.

That was at start December. Already she has found a "new man" who she thinks she is marrying in May. He is a single father, the child's mother signed her over at birth (he talked her out of termination). The child is 4. She said she is adopting the little girl (same age as her middle child, also a girl).

The conversation with her was surreal - taking very fast, repeatedly telling me how rich new man is, and how big engagement ring is. Whole long saga about new man's past and lots sordid details about STBXH. When I said I doubted she'd be getting married in May as she hasn't even started divorce proceedings she just dismissed me. Almost not coherent.

After I hung up I called a mutual friend who said, oh dear, I have been thinking she is manic, perhaps bipolar, but she is so happy about new man she just won't listen to anyone. Other issues - spending money she doesn't have on new clothes / shoes (presumably new man will pay??)

She needs help. But how? Friend also concerned about the children, as the 10 year old keeps on turning up at friends house (a few doors away) saying her mum is shouting. Acquaintance told 10 year old that Daddy has lots of girlfriends, and also that he doesn't love her anymore (ie mum is trying to turn 10 year old away from her father). Acquaintance claimed to me that 10 year old asked if she can call new man "dad".


foreverondiet Tue 18-Feb-14 20:09:45


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