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finding hard to control my anger

(2 Posts)
flanneryann Tue 21-Jan-14 13:15:38

Just that really. I have a 5 year old and a very boisterous toddler. I am work two days a week so I wouldn't say that I don't get a break from the kids. I feel under an enormous pressure to be in control for example with housework, being on time and generally getting the things done that I have to do. I get unreasonably frustrated if things are not done, and I seem to spend more time doing chores than enjoying being with my children. I just wanted my toddler to have a nap so I could get on with stuff and he refused. I got quite angry, completely over the top really. I have not hit my child but the rage inside me really frightened me. I am not a smacker at all but I felt like I could have belted him to be honest.
I fully admit that I am a control freak and I drive my husband and kids mad with my unreasonable demands for perfection. I just can't seem to just be happy to how things are.
I had been having some issues with my contraception lately. I have just had a mirena removed and am also on the pill so I don't know if that may be partly to blame. But really I was like this before too. I would say I really lack motivation to play with my kids and the guilt of this drives me mad.
Sometimes I just think I should never have had kids as I am quite sure I am going to mess them up.

silvermirror Tue 21-Jan-14 14:32:18

It maybe a good idea and visit yr gp.

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