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no hope anymore, fallen off my tablets again but I've had enough now

(83 Posts)
TrinityIsAReindeer Wed 18-Dec-13 13:27:44

there is no light at the end of the fucking tunnel

I'm just so tired and in pain

I'm sitting in a bombsite eating tinned mac and cheese and just trying to get to friday pick up time

literally just get the kids to school, sleep, eat, ignore everything

then I need to make xmas happen

everything is so much effort and makes my head hurt

Alchemist Wed 18-Dec-13 19:07:23

I would like to offer my hand, not much but very well meant. Take care x

TinselinaBumSquash Wed 18-Dec-13 19:18:05

Excellent work on the kitchen!

Good move to stay in and relax, I almost wept with joy when they announced football wasn't on this week. grin

I've packed the kids off to bed early so I can slowly sort my house out. I've just walked round it then sat and took a good few deep breaths to stop myself from crying and screaming.

You're doing fantastically well despite everything Trinity, your children will know that and I expect they're really prod to have you as their mum. thanks

BewitchedBotheredandBewildered Wed 18-Dec-13 19:34:31

You see? You are bloody amazing! Look at that list of stuff you've done, it's brilliant.
Hard luck running out of petrol, but you turned it into a positive.
It's really shit to feel shit at this time of year, it's dark and cold and howling and i find the littlest thing gets blown out of proportion. And that's down here in the sunny south grin
I've said before I wish I was closer to you. I'd come and boss you around and tuck you up in bed with hot water bottles. Make you brew but you don't like hot drinks, stuff you with cake
And deffo scrub your kitchen floor, and feel privileged to do it.

still want to kidnap Lolly so probably lucky I'm not too close grin

HeartsTrumpDiamonds Wed 18-Dec-13 23:15:27

Aaah Trinity you don't know me but I feel like I know you and wish I could help properly, I'll join BBB and come and scrub floors and fold stuff and wipe down surfaces. I'm ace at kitchens, my MIL "lets me" clean hers when I visit and she always claims it is never cleaner than when I do it. Never mind that I never seem to bother with my own kitchen

I hate depression / anxiety / mental health bullshit. You are doing so, so well.

ColouringInQueen Wed 18-Dec-13 23:31:37

Hi Trinity you don't know me, but I've seen some of your posts on here and just wanted to offer another hand to hold and also to say that you've managed to do loads today. It's great you've got the meds sorted, and I hope you and your girls had a lovely snuggle this evening. You have many mums including me wishing you well. One day at a time. You are doing sooo well. Be kind to yourself, take care x flowers

BewitchedBotheredandBewildered Thu 19-Dec-13 09:20:22

I hope you had a peaceful, snuggly evening and the girls got off to school OK this morning.
Is it still stormy up there?

Queenofknickers Thu 19-Dec-13 15:37:22

Thinking of you today, Trin, hoping its a better day thanks

TrinityIsAReindeer Thu 19-Dec-13 18:01:19

hi all

me and the two little ones choked with the cold this morning

haven't got out of bed except to remedicate

feel dreadful

eyes hurt to use the pooter but thought I should check in

back off to bed

thanks everyone

BewitchedBotheredandBewildered Thu 19-Dec-13 20:12:19

Oh dear, sorry love.

Bed's probably best. Really hope you feel better soon.

I s'pose you can't get anyone round to help in case they catch it.

Thinking of you.

Best I can do is cakeflowerscakeflowerscake

And some more ((((hugs)))) smile

BewitchedBotheredandBewildered Sat 21-Dec-13 01:05:47

Hope you're all feeling better.

You can just chill now, no deadlines smile


TrinityIsAReindeer Sun 22-Dec-13 09:29:02

my head still hurts sad
mentally feeling better, thanks to my alarm for taking my tabs. I can feel hope returning.

things are realky shit but I think I can imagine a tiny little tea light flickering at the end if a bloody long tunnel

but my face hurts. im blowing my brain out through my nose
when I stand up my head and face throbs sad

mainlining lemsip and ibuprofen
running out of loo roll

but I have wrapped all the pressies

and I just need to wait till I get some money in my account on tuesday and then I can buy sone christmas food smile

thankyou everyone for being so kind
pkease dont go away

TinselinaBumSquash Sun 22-Dec-13 09:30:57

Still here!

It's great to hear you're feeling a bit better, what are you planning on for Christmas food?
Are the kids looking forward the Christmas? I think for the first time I'm going to struggle to get mine to sleep this year!

TrinityIsAReindeer Sun 22-Dec-13 09:45:32

they are massively excited. any time soon they are going to start counting down in hours grin

I just want to get a chicken crown and some nice potatoes

hopefully have some money for some more crackers (stupidly let them have some already) and some chocolate and nice things

TrinityIsAReindeer Sun 22-Dec-13 09:49:36

I just posted and it disappeared grr

kids are massively excited, almost counting down in hours grin

just after a chicken crown and some nice potatoes
hopefully managevto buy some more crackers and some chocolates and treats

TrinityIsAReindeer Sun 22-Dec-13 09:49:49

I just posted and it disappeared grr

kids are massively excited, almost counting down in hours grin

just after a chicken crown and some nice potatoes
hopefully managevto buy some more crackers and some chocolates and treats

TrinityIsAReindeer Sun 22-Dec-13 09:51:53

ugh it didnt dissappear and now im double posting

TinselinaBumSquash Sun 22-Dec-13 09:51:54

Sound fab! Food is always the best bit of Christmas for me. :D

I'm trying to persuade the kids to have a roast today so I can cook a chicken and the trimmings but they're requesting Shepard's Pie instead hmm

BewitchedBotheredandBewildered Sun 22-Dec-13 10:20:54

Well done wrapping all the presents, I haven't done any yet!

Went to a wedding yesterday which gobbled up the whole day.

It's absolutely howling here today, and pouring rain.

So pleased to hear the meds are starting to work, and hope that bloody cold buggers off soon. Are the girls recovered?


TrinityIsAReindeer Sun 22-Dec-13 10:40:46

girls are snotty but obviously feeling better today.

ive just been very brave a walked lolly pup on the shore (seas out)

It is howling with wind and pissing it down so she only got 20mins but she ran flat out chasing birds the whole time so I think thats a win grin

BewitchedBotheredandBewildered Sun 22-Dec-13 11:02:42

That will have done you good too, bet you feel better having done it.

I'd better go and get dressed grin, going out for lunch.

Back later, have a good day flopping.

BewitchedBotheredandBewildered Wed 25-Dec-13 01:33:51

Hope you all have a loving, lovely christmas Trin.
Will be thinking of you.
xxx < your girls xxx < you xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx < lolly grin


RhondaJean Wed 25-Dec-13 01:37:26

Happy Christmas trin

We are thinking of you xx

ChippingInLovesChristmasLights Wed 25-Dec-13 01:48:26

Trin I hope you managed to get some shopping in and that you and the girls have a nice christmas - despite everything. Keep taking those tablets - now is not the time to come off them.

If running out of petrol gets that much done in the house - only put a fiver in each time fgrin

Much love to you all

Onlyjoking Thu 26-Dec-13 00:23:36

Hi Trin, sorry think are difficult your had a real crap time of it.<understatement >
There are some Apps for meds, really good and worked far better than my memory.
Try and carry on tackling bits as and when. The other stuff can wait.
Can you get any support from homestart or SS?
Give me a shout on FB if you need a listening ear.

TrinityIsAReindeer Thu 26-Dec-13 10:03:14

Thankyou everyone smile

purplepillow invited us for xmas dinner

we had a lovely time

totally sober and we played charades smile

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