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Mental health

My Sister committed suicide.

60 replies

Juneywoony · 30/10/2013 00:48

My 27 year old sister sadly took her own life on Sunday, I'm broken I can't sleep or eat I don't know what to do with myself. It was a shock but not a surprise she was crippled by depression and I just hope she has found some peace now.

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Brittapie · 30/10/2013 00:52

Didn't want to read and run, although I don't really have any useful advice.

Oh, you poor love. xxx

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thecatfromjapan · 30/10/2013 01:00

Do you have anyone with you? Would you like to talk about her? Would you like to witter?

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whysorude · 30/10/2013 01:01

Oh goodness. That is truly awful for you. xx

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Juneywoony · 30/10/2013 01:10

My husband is in bed, I've not long got off the phone to her best friend and my mum, we are all distraught. I don't know why I'm writing here really I just don't know what to do with myself. I know I should go to bed but I'm dreading waking up and it hitting me all again.

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AlfalfaMa · 30/10/2013 01:12

I'm so sorry. Depression is such a cruel illness.
Sending you love.

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thecatfromjapan · 30/10/2013 01:12

You can sit and chat here, then.

Do you have to get up early tomorrow?

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TSSDNCOP · 30/10/2013 01:15

Would you like to tell us about her OP? Aside from her illness, what made her "her" and some of the things you remember her with love for?

I'm so sorry that you and your family are suffering now. The way she has died is so terribly lonely and sad. My thoughts are with you and hoping you find some peace of mind xx

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SecretWitch · 30/10/2013 01:16

Juneywooney, my heart hurts for you and your family. Your grief must feel overwhelming. Would you like to talk to us about your sister? If it is alright with you I will pray for her and you. Sending you ((hugs))

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Normalitycalls · 30/10/2013 01:16

Hi, I've been in a similar situation with my dh. It is a horrible place to be but I couldn't help my dh and I'm sure you did everything to help your sister. There are some things you cannot fix :(
You will get some help here so please keep coming back in addition to real life
Xx

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Normalitycalls · 30/10/2013 01:19

Hi, I've been in a similar situation with my dh. It is a horrible place to be but I couldn't help my dh and I'm sure you did everything to help your sister. There are some things you cannot fix :(
You will get some help here so please keep coming back in addition to real life
Xx

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Juneywoony · 30/10/2013 01:20

Thank you.

I have a routine appointment with my psych in the morning which has come at a good time really. I have bipolar, I've been quite well for a couple of months. I spoke to him today to see if it was okay to up my dosage of clonazepam just to get me through this and he said yes and was really supportive. So at least they are making me a bit numb and drowsy.
I'm just so angry she had the crisis team going in everyday as she was on suicide watch, why the fuck hadn't they put her in hospital!!

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Normalitycalls · 30/10/2013 01:26

My dh was very clever at manipulating the people who were there to help him. The last job he did was to fix the IT system of the health professionals who were supposed to help him. He killed himself the next day.
You need to concentrate on yourself at the moment and make sure your mental and physical health is A1.
Time will help.

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thecatfromjapan · 30/10/2013 01:28

Had she been in hospital before?

That's good about seeing your psychiatrist tomorrow. Do you think you might need a little more help with sleeping?

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KalevalaForMePlease · 30/10/2013 01:36

So sorry Juney. Would you like to talk about her? Xx

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Juneywoony · 30/10/2013 01:36

Yes my appointment couldn't have come at a better time really. I have a cpn but she is off sick. Although I know there isn't much they can do really, what I'm feeling is normal and not part of my illness, but yes maybe I may ask about some temporary sleeping tablets.

She was a lovely girl we had the same sense of humour always laughed at daft things together. She doted on my kids, she had none of her own. Her problems started when her ex bf of 6 years killed himself 6 years ago, she was the last person he text, she just never got over the guilt. I just hope they are together now.

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KalevalaForMePlease · 30/10/2013 01:38

Xposted, sorry. It's totally understandable that you're angry, and want to vent. And I'm glad you've got an appointment tomorrow. Just take one day at a time.

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KalevalaForMePlease · 30/10/2013 01:41

Ah Juney that's so sad, it does sound like she never got over it. It sounds like she was a lovely person, and a great auntie. How are your DCs?

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SunshineSuperNova · 30/10/2013 01:45

I'm so sorry Juney. I lost my best friend to suicide 8 years ago.

Big hugs Flowers

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Juneywoony · 30/10/2013 01:50

Their too young to understand they are 6 and 4, my inlaws have been fantastic and looked after them since sunday. Their coming home tomorrow afternoon so they should keep me busy and my mind occupied.

I'm just frustrated as my mum and brother live a 100 miles away, I spent the day with them Sunday and have been in constant contact on the phone. My poor brother found her, she hung herself he has to live with that image forever.

I went to see her in the hospital Sunday night, I'm glad I did I couldn't stand the thought of her being all alone in a strange place and to check that she was really dead if that makes sense! But seeing her like that wasn't nice.

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2Retts · 30/10/2013 01:57

I can idenitfy Juneywoony...sincere condolences Thanks

My Db committed suicide some years ago and my DSis sufered MH issues following and came pretty close to success whilst on a unit! Please don't feel bad that she wasn't hospitalised etc. Some things will simply 'play out' regardless of where a person is.

I totally appreciate that doesn't help but, as TSSDNCOP says, it definitely helps to talk about the wonderful person you lost and to focus on the positives that you loved about them x

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Juneywoony · 30/10/2013 02:02

Thank you for all your kind words, yes fond memories of her are keeping me going and I have such a kind, supportive husband and two beautiful kids to keep me going too.

I am going to go to bed now and try and sleep,

Thanks again. xx

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KalevalaForMePlease · 30/10/2013 02:02

Your poor brother Juney, that must be awful for him to deal with. A death like this can just create ripples through the lives of so many people. It's all so tragic. What you said about going to see her in the hospital because you didn't want her to be alone brought tears to my eyes. You sound like a lovely, caring sister.

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hellokittymania · 30/10/2013 02:11

((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))()

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thecatfromjapan · 30/10/2013 02:12

Good night. Wishing you a good day tomorrow.

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Thumbfuckerwitch · 30/10/2013 02:19

So very sad for you Juney, what an awful thing to have to deal with. And how dreadful for your brother to have that image. Hope he can access some counselling pretty quickly, that's quite traumatic.

Like 2Retts said though, hospitalising your sister may not have stopped her from doing it anyway - a bloke I went to school with was hospitalised with paranoid schizophrenia after an "interesting" druggy party he went to, and he managed to escape from the 24h suicide watch he was under during lunch, and killed himself. :(

While there isn't really anything anyone can say to make you feel "better" at this time, I just hope that you can feel that she is somehow released from whatever torment she was in and is now at peace.

You're very brave to have gone to see her at the hospital. I hope that you get as much love and understanding as possible from your family and friends, it's a dark time but I hope you have all the support you need to get through it.

If you need any help with how to explain things to your children, then Winston's Wish is supposed to be very useful

((((hugs))))

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