Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, see our mental health web guide which can point you to expert advice.

Not Driving Away!

(1000 Posts)
Pumble Sat 13-Jul-13 14:21:09

P1 splashing in the paddling pool and P2 having a nap. So pleased to be back and they are so pleased to be with each other again.

Can't believe we got to 1000 posts! You need to change your nn now too don't you wylye ?!

MrsHelsBels74 Sun 28-Jul-13 07:38:30

Had one of the worst nights sleep ever last night & just want to cry this morning. DH was up with DS2 in the night so it's not really fair to make him get up so I'm just hoping a cup of tea will make things better.

magimedi Sun 28-Jul-13 09:05:58

Poor you, cup of tea & some food - bad sleep always makes me very hungry.

rowrowrowtheboat Sun 28-Jul-13 11:14:58

Poor MrsH. Head down, and crawl through the day as best you can. Hopefully this wind we're having will blow away all trials and tribulations.

rowrowrowtheboat Sun 28-Jul-13 21:15:36


Pumble Sun 28-Jul-13 21:23:17

Hope your day improved mrshb

We've had a good weekend (since the cupboard visit wink)although some sleep would be nice-just can't seem to sleep well at night. I'm so exhausted by lunchtime at the moment!

Pumblette 1 is going through a lovely whingy phase though-delightful. Pumblette 2 is still having tests-hopefully no more now!

I've spent the evening trying to do my cbt homework.....another session tomorrow...

rowrowrowtheboat Sun 28-Jul-13 21:33:34

Good luck with your session tomorrow Pumble. Glad you have had a good weekend. I've had poor sleep too for a few weeks, poor DH had me growing this evening. I'm now tediously putting stuff on eBay to clear some room ad get some pennies. Bored of doing it now but loads more to do.

Don't you love whine and whine moments! I tell mine to get rid of the whiny voice and tell me properly, but they did an excellent impression of grumpy mummy this morning so I think I need to heed my own advice!

My dd2 is testing who blinks first. We are having tantrums that last ages, including at bedtime, so sadly, she is not going to bed happy. Here's hoping it is a two week blip that will pass. We are both stubborn.... wink.

Let us know how the session goes.

magimedi Mon 29-Jul-13 19:56:20

Hope that session went well, Pumble.

I have been slopping around all day in my dressing gown as have felt 'meh' but not quite ill. Sore throat, queasy & just 'off'.

Early night for me.

LongTailedTit Mon 29-Jul-13 21:28:59

Evening all!
Glad you didn't move back into the cupboard Pumble, how're you finding the CBT? I had phone appointments, kind if wish I'd gone for the in-person option as the remoteness meant I avoided some stuff quite easily!

Last week was a rerun of last year, dressing gown on til mid afternoon, I really need to sort my insomnia out, it's getting ridiculous. 3am bedtimes make me a crap mummy the next day.
I've been desperate for DS to start talking more, but realised that some days I'm practically a mute - no wonder his language skills are a bit stuck! sad

Here's to a better week for all of us - brew all round, make yours a honey & lemon Magi smile

Pumble Mon 29-Jul-13 21:30:54

How were DD2's whinges today rowrow I'm wondering if they can be put in a cupboard until they grow out of them?!

Hope you're sleeping well now magi and wake up feeling much better.

There wasn't much CBT today as I am having the sessions alongside some work on seeing how pumblette 2 and I interact so there was more of that today. I do find it hard work to think so much though and find that I am thinking and thinking but I suppose that that is a good thing really.

Just feeling a little flat but can't quite put my finger on it if that makes sense. I really need to go for a great run (which I haven't done in forever) but want to go with somebody (always more fun) but feel I am so out of practise there is nobody who would run with me. I always used to run with Mr P but obviously one of us needs to be with the pumblettes - grrr. Sorry - that was a little self indulgent sad

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 29-Jul-13 22:12:29

Evening all. It sounds like we all need some cupboard love, with ne thing or another!

Really hope Magi feels better after a good sleep, and long tail cracks the evil insomnia. That is a really cruel thing to suffer. The talking will come. Maybe if you haven't the energy to talk, you could sing along to your fav songs - it's still words, and could make him laugh if you do your best silly dancing too!

Whines have been scaled back today, and bedtime was much better. We are slowly getting her to bed earlier each night. By that, I mean she's giving up on the screaming and tantrums earlier each night. I think with the holiday and the heat, she had got used to late nights, and genuinely couldn't sleep and wanted company. At least there were no tears tonight. I think she's starting to learn that no doesn't change to yes the more she screams (though DD1 caves in very quickly, I've got to get her to hold her ground and not give up her favourite toys to stop the screaming, she is such a sweetheart, but puts herself last).

Are you feeling flat because your CBT was not so much around today? Are you keen for things to change, and flat because it takes time? Don't put too much pressure on yourself. It does take time. You have come a million miles since Christmas.

A good run is very good. I give up and walk if I don't run with someone and I think I am too rubbish to run with someone else. Another mum offered to run together recently and I thought she would be super fast, but she seemed to have a similar pace. I didn't talk for half the run for fear of running out of steam, but managed to give more that one word answers half way round when I realised I could just about do both and I was nearer the end than the beginning!

I bet you one wine in the cupboard you could find someone willing to run with you, who equally feels out of practise.

Pumble Tue 30-Jul-13 13:59:45

That cupboard is looking pretty attractive about now!! wink

MrsHelsBels74 Tue 30-Jul-13 16:56:11

Meh, boys can't share today so they're separated. If anyone's got spare room in a cupboard, preferably with wine, brew and biscuit I'd be happy.

Pumble Tue 30-Jul-13 17:05:16

Join me in my cupboard but its a pretty miserable place. I would find a happier cupboard if I were you.

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 30-Jul-13 17:59:27

biscuit brew wine flowers and, in the hope that gin doesn't clash with whatever made magi feel meh, [gin]

Help yourself then retreat to respective cupboards.

Pumble Tue 30-Jul-13 18:50:24

All contributions to the cupboard appreciated, especially gin. It's been such a bad afternoon I think I'm going to bed when the pumblettes do in ten minutes. Maybe that way the day will be over sooner.

MrsHelsBels74 Tue 30-Jul-13 21:22:17

DS1 is still awake...would prefer vodka to gin though.

MrsHelsBels74 Wed 31-Jul-13 09:05:24

Feel terrible, just made DS1 cry. He jumped on me & hurt me, I shouted at him & pushed him off me, he fell over & cried. He wasn't hurt but said I frightened him. I'm such a crap mum.

LongTailedTit Wed 31-Jul-13 13:14:42

MrsHB I'm sorry you're having a shit morning. Tbh he jumped on you and you reacted - I would've done exactly the same. They do need to know that they sometimes hurt us, we're not blooming punchbags.
Another day he might have fallen over and walked off singing, or if he was my DS he would've jumped on you again! grin hmm

I've got crapmumitis and now DSs cold as well.

DS usually sleeps thru, but was up and really bloody awake from 12-5 last night. I'd had to keep the light on as he was doing his usual acrobatics on the edge of the bed, after a few hours of being kicked and pinched ("Funny, Mummy!" No DS, it really isn't) I'd had it and turned the light off in the hope that he'd get sleepy. He promptly fell off the bed. Screaming ensued (and a row with DH about who was having the shittest night hmm ). He's fine, but what a horrible night.

Pumble Wed 31-Jul-13 21:27:24

Sorry it's been a crappy day for ltt and mrshb

I would have done exactly the same thing mrshb and have done. It is mortifying at the time but sometimes it just happens. P1 got shouted at yesterday and yes, I've been feeling guilty since but my cbt man (who I saw today) did try to explain that shouting doesn't make you a crap mum. Your boys know how much you love them and one moment of shouting won't change that.

Really hope you get some more sleep tonight ltt

Yesterday was grim as I spent six hours trying to pin p2 down to get a wee sample....I spent over two hours crying as a result and was just horrible but today has been better. We managed a wee sample and cbt appointment was good but it does make me think a lot which I'm not sure is a good thing at times! The bit about looking at the communication and relationship between p2 and I definitely is an eye opener though.

I really hope that everyone has had a quiet evening and bedtime and we all get a good nights sleep.

Tomorrow is another

LongTailedTit Wed 31-Jul-13 21:43:50

Yes, how the flipping heck are you meant to get a wee sample off a baby girl?? Have heard of tucking sandwich bags into boys nappies around the relevant plumbing, pretty sure that'd be a waste of time with a girl! Glad you got it in the end.

If you are ok talking about it, what is it about communication with P2?
I'm so glad you're finding it productive! smile

Pumble Wed 31-Jul-13 21:58:21

The worst bit of the wee sample is that it had to be 'clean' and so she had to be totally clean (a challenge when crawling around naked) and the sample bottle (which is tiny!) couldn't touch anything including her skin! It is our third attempt - the first two haven't been 'clean' enough (I think they touched her skin...!)

As part of the sessions, they film P2 and I doing activities together and then the following session, they show me clips from it and we talk about them. We look at how when she's playing with things, how she looks to me to communicate what she's looking at, how she wants to share things, looks to me for reassurance when things happen etc if that makes sense? I worry that all that has happened has interfered with me and P2 and that she is a poor neglected 2nd child (!) and so to see her want to share things with me and look to me for security etc is definitely helping. I'm not sure any of that makes sense? That probably all sounds entirely bonkers - I shall see if I can explain it better.

Is your DS asleep at the moment ltt ?

LongTailedTit Wed 31-Jul-13 23:33:07

Gosh that sounds very interesting, waaaay more involved than what I did!
One of my NCT group is a psychologist and she did a little talk for us about separation anxiety and how DC show their comfort/reassurance etc., it was really interesting but actually worries me a bit as DS has a few of the negative bonding behaviours.

DS is asleep, woke for a cry earlier, but I decided to let him settle in his own this time as last night's wakings led to our all-night-playtime-marathon. He was pretty good today considering, and had a late bedtime so hopefully he'll go right thru to morning. Speaking of which, I must take myself off to bed too!

Hope you have a good night, and that you never have to collect magic clean wee in a thimble again! smile xxx

Pumble Thu 01-Aug-13 21:07:41

It is really interesting ltt and I hope will help with the CBT too, although I feel there is so much to do...

Hope you all had a better night and day, despite the heat.

I will have to do another wee sample... P2 is now on antibiotics and another sample in ten days and then a scan of her kidneys. Not helped that we are leaving the country tomorrow for ten days... They aren't sure they are the right antibotics and won't know until we have left and so we may have to visit a nice foreign doctor to change them if necessary. Ho hum.... Breathe, breathe, breathe and hope it's all ok.

Can I have an award for phoning my mother in law to tell her about P2. Needless to say she screened my call but I phoned her and left a message and given she hates me, I feel pretty proud of myself.

I saw my HV today who has an idea that I feel is a little crazy - I shall fill you in when I have thought about it a bit. Unlikely to have internet for most of the time when away so hope you all have a good week.

I'm really going to miss you all!! smile

rowrowrowtheboat Thu 01-Aug-13 21:56:19

Pumble, your sessions sound really constructive. Well done with contacting the in laws. Hope P2 has the right Antibiotics and that you all have a fantastic holiday. Don't get too stressed packing, and hope you get a little time to be with MrP.

Also sending good vibes to ltt and mrshb and that all the little ones have no tantrums tomorrow, as that is entirely possible, isn't it? hmm

magimedi Thu 01-Aug-13 22:19:26

Have a lovely holiday, Pumble.

Hope everyone else is OK.

Still got lurking lurgy (only way I can describe it) & feeling a bit down but will be OK.

This thread is not accepting new messages.