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Can you help me find support for my friend whose dd has anorexia?

(10 Posts)
NigellaLawless Thu 11-Apr-13 22:10:46

My good friend's teenage daughter has been suffering with anorexia for at least a year now. She is being seen regularly by a dietician, a counsellor and a psychologist; this has been the case for at least six months. But things are getting worse and her dd's BMI is now 15.

My friend is terrified for her dd's health. she is doing everything she can to encourage her to eat and address the issues.

I want to support my friend but I have no experience of anorexia so I don't know how helpful I really am. Can anyone recommend any books or websites that offer support to parents of anorexic teens? Anything to help my friend feel less alone in this, anything to show her that her daughter could recover and lead a happy, healthy life?

spudmasher Thu 11-Apr-13 22:19:10

No, but could not read this and not reply. There but for the grace of god go I.

Ujjayi Fri 12-Apr-13 01:05:19

B-Eat might be useful. Also Rhodes Farm which was started by Dr Dee Dawson - a leading expert in treating children and teens with EDs.

NigellaLawless Fri 12-Apr-13 08:42:32

Thank you both I really appreciate you taking the time to answer.

I will check out those links Ujjayi

Dancingqueen17 Fri 12-Apr-13 17:41:12

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Blondie1984 Fri 12-Apr-13 23:45:27

Do you know if in patient treatment for her daughter has ever been mentioned?

I have been managing an eating disorder for over 10 years now - although thankfully much better than I was - I would be more than happy to talk to her about my experiences if you think it might help her.....

DevonCiderPunk Fri 12-Apr-13 23:49:27

Find out whether Rethink Mental Illness operate community support in her area

NigellaLawless Sun 14-Apr-13 18:27:56

Thank you Dancing, Blondie and Devon. as of yet inpatient care has not been mentioned although my friend has begun to wonder if this would help. she is also considering whether taking a leave of absence from work to stay at home and care for her daughter would help.

Blondie that is really kind of you to offer smile I will speak to her about it.

I will check out all your links tonight if ds sleeps better than he has been recently! And then will pass them on to my friend.

Thank you all again flowers

sillymummy11 Sun 14-Apr-13 23:09:33

Hiya NigellaLawless I was diagnosed with anorexia as a teenager, spent 2 years in an inpatient unit, ended up being sectioned...blah blah. It is a crap thing to have.

I am completely fine (well apart from occasional depression) but no eating disorder now at all. It was all a long time ago, but I found that the trouble with an inpatient unit is that you can PROPERLY learn how to be anorexic there. Oh, the stuff I learnt. And the things I saw. Best avoided, if possible, but sometimes necessary (I would not be alive now otherwise).

The most useful thing my friends and mum did was to keep showing me that there was more to life than food.

Sometimes anorexia is about wanting to be slim. However, most anorexics I knew had something seriously quite wrong in their lives, it wasn't about dieting. Starvation can be way of avoiding confronting the bigger issue....if you're not eating all you can think about is how hungry you are, not about the big scary problems. Sometimes it is useful when everyone around you focuses on food as in a way it is colluding with your desire not to confront what is really going on. With these situations, with the other anorexics I knew, and myself, sometimes things have to get worse before they get better. It is a long, hard, bumpy road, certainly not an overnight thing. If your friend's daughter is cooperating with her appointments, even if she is still losing weight, this is a good start. The most important thing is for your friend not to lose patience and get cross with the pros that she is still losing weight, as her daughter needs to have faith and trust in them.

sillymummy11 Sun 14-Apr-13 23:11:50

PS I have 3 lovely kids, a career and it has been noted (by those who never knew) how easy I am to feed as I 'eat anything'!! It doesn't have to last forever.

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