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Last session of a course of psychotherapy a bit weird

(15 Posts)
DioneTheDiabolist Thu 28-Feb-13 00:34:11

I hope what she said did not make you feel that way blush

ILoveBagels Wed 27-Feb-13 22:34:11

perceived criticism OF me, even.

ILoveBagels Wed 27-Feb-13 22:32:58

i've been in weekly therapy for over 2 years and i have really struggled to let my therapist in. it's been a very slow process of gradually building trust in a person to allow myself to be 'seen' in all my vulnerability (and i'm still not there yet, wherever there may be). i find it very very hard.

i wonder if you can allow yourself to reflect on your therapist's words and see what feelings/emotions they trigger in you. for example, i know any perceived criticism in me creates feelings of not being good enough, which then makes me want to get away from the person/situation. sometimes if you allow these feelings to stay until they naturally subside, even though they are uncomfortable, you can learn that you can manage them, rather than them manage you.

good luck, i think you've been really brave going for therapy xxx

DioneTheDiabolist Wed 27-Feb-13 18:30:47

I hope that you are not feeling ashamed. And I hope that what she said make you feel that way. As for you protecting yourself during therapy, this is normal and natural. It takes time to trust someone, therapist or not.

GnocchiGnocchiWhosThere Tue 26-Feb-13 21:08:14

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DioneTheDiabolist Tue 26-Feb-13 10:11:05

It might be NaicePig. Not a criticism of your engagement in therapy, but an observation of how you engage with yourself. Such a thing is difficult to deal with in time limited therapy which tends to be goal focussed.

Do you think that might be what she was getting at?

GnocchiGnocchiWhosThere Mon 25-Feb-13 23:12:07

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DioneTheDiabolist Mon 25-Feb-13 21:18:19

Just a thought (based on what you've said above).

Could it be that you not only hold back from your DH, but you hold back from yourself? By that I mean that you don't listen your own thoughts and feelings. That you are a bit afraid of yourself, so you filter and edit those thoughts and feelings that scare you or make you feel insecure? Thereby losing touch with your Real Self?

GnocchiGnocchiWhosThere Mon 25-Feb-13 19:41:56

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DioneTheDiabolist Mon 25-Feb-13 19:21:07

You didn't do anything wrong Naicepig. It takes a while to come to trust anyone, therapists included. The end of therapy is seen as the beginning of real change and it is not uncommon for therapists to mention things that didn't come up (or there is no time for) in session, but the therapist thinks should provide you with food for thought.

I doubt she meant it as a criticism, but as it was something that she had noticed may be worth addressing in your own time. Regarding you feeling ashamed, maybe she just needed to make sure that this was not how you felt before leaving therapy.

GnocchiGnocchiWhosThere Mon 25-Feb-13 19:08:40

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GnocchiGnocchiWhosThere Mon 25-Feb-13 19:06:58

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cantreachmytoes Mon 25-Feb-13 18:41:40

I don't know how it's supposed to work, but (in hindsight, these things rarely come to us at the time) it could have been interesting to "suggest" that she seemed more direct and critical than she had been in other sessions and it made you feel odd and wondered if she was going to miss you, so wanted to upset you so you'd feel compelled to return!

BerryLellow Mon 25-Feb-13 18:33:30

I have absolutely no experience of therapy, so may be way off, but it sounds like she wants you to book more sessions? If you pay privately that is.

GnocchiGnocchiWhosThere Mon 25-Feb-13 18:26:06

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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