I have had depression for years, many years, but its been cope-able off and on.
I have PTSD are leaving abusive marriage, I have 2 lovely Dc, they do not see X as he is abusive and a drug addict, we moved house IN October, I was flying as high a kite! Getting us away from this man and the house we all lived in together.
Up every morning at 7am, Dc to school, dog walked, back home, here, college work, walk dog again, get dinner ready, clothes reading for boys to change, boys have counselling one a Tuesday one Thursday, then go to Dparents on a Friday, sometimes home on Saturday or Sunday depending upon what they want to do.
I'm just giving a back ground picture so I do not drip feed, I/we were all very happy to move, okay I cannot sleep in this house (no idea why) without medication but doctors just keep saying 'more councelling no pills can help you'
I am so very very very low it's hard, everything is difficult, dog not been walked for week sunless DC do it, still capable of making meals, laying out clothes, false smiles for Dc, but I feel terrible, I have tried and tried to pull myself out of this but cannot, I wake unhappy, I go to bed unhappy, see DC off to school and want to go back to bed, sadly I cannot sleep to just lie for a while, then feel guilty to attempt to tidy.
i have codependency issues ( this year) last year it was the opposite...and built up one date with an ex (from when I was 20 years younger) into I have no idea what...I don't even know if I like him but chased him anyway via a text saying 'lovely night, lets stay friends' and I didn't even mean it! I just didn't want to get hurt so thought best to finish anything before it started...
Now i cannot stop thinking about him (strange thing is I don't even know if I like him I think not but didn't give any one time to find out)
I am not looking after myself, lookswise, I don't care anymore, crying for no reason (other peoples problems), i won't say my life is problem free but I shouldn't be like this right now, everyone is telling me to 'pull yourself together' and I am trying... I walked the dog at the weekend, felt slightly happier but it was a 2 minutes walk.
I was so bad last week and I know this is awful,I didn't feed the dog for 2 days so I didn't have to walk her.
i don't know where I am going with this, I guess I am asking if anyone else has ever felt very low and been unable to pull themselves from it?
I am on anti-anxiety/depressants but they are not working, I am scared to change them as just now I get 5 or 6 hours sleep, even thought I am depressed as well just flat like this __ and cannot stop thinking about some ex who I suspect I do not even like!
if you got this far then thanks - no idea if I will press the post button but that feels better seeing it all wrote out..
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Mental health
Depression -Depressed - Ideas for getting over this!
7 replies
OverlyYappyAlways · 28/01/2013 16:33
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