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Mental health

I can't live like this anymore

37 replies

CuppaCiggieBiccieBliss · 23/10/2012 19:20

I am so fed up. Have been on sertraline for a while now and it's made no difference. I still have panic attacks anytime I have to go out, still haven't slept for more than an hour a night.
The flashbacks are happening every day Sad
I can't carry on like this, dd deserves so much better.
Counselling is like a weekly form of torture, sheer hell with absolutely no benefit.

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TheMonster · 23/10/2012 19:22

How long have you been on those particular meds?

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CuppaCiggieBiccieBliss · 23/10/2012 19:38

A couple of months(ish). I started on 50mg then was upped to 100.
Sorry I'm not making a great deal of sense, I just can't see an end to it.

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TheMonster · 23/10/2012 19:40

When was the increase? It could be that you need to try a different medication.

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CuppaCiggieBiccieBliss · 23/10/2012 19:50

It was increased a couple of weeks after I started. I don't think there's any point, nothing works Sad
They may as well have killed me when they had the chance. I can't go on like this, I really can't. Everything is just such a mess.

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CuppaCiggieBiccieBliss · 23/10/2012 19:50

It was increased a couple of weeks after I started. I don't think there's any point, nothing works Sad
They may as well have killed me when they had the chance. I can't go on like this, I really can't. Everything is just such a mess.

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bacon · 23/10/2012 22:29

Perhaps the counsellor isnt for you - can you change her/him?

Everything isnt a mess you can overcome this- you have to want to.

You need to go back to GP and sort tomorrow.

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chinley · 25/10/2012 11:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hoophopes · 25/10/2012 17:31

Could you ask to have a break from the counselling if it is not helping, until you feel able to benefit from it? I was told that counselling when not stable isn't always helpful.

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CuppaCiggieBiccieBliss · 26/10/2012 16:52

Tbh I just want to stop the counselling but I had to start it or the gp wouldn't give me any meds.
I am struggling so much with panic attacks, nightmares (only if by some miracle I can actually sleep) and anxiety. The counselling (for me) really is a waste of time. I don't appreciate being forced to talk about "it".
My poor dd deserves so much more than me. I am failing her in every way possible.

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CuppaCiggieBiccieBliss · 26/10/2012 16:52

Tbh I just want to stop the counselling but I had to start it or the gp wouldn't give me any meds.
I am struggling so much with panic attacks, nightmares (only if by some miracle I can actually sleep) and anxiety. The counselling (for me) really is a waste of time. I don't appreciate being forced to talk about "it".
My poor dd deserves so much more than me. I am failing her in every way possible.

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fuckadoodlepoopoo · 26/10/2012 16:57

What would stopping the counselling achieve? If things are so bad how do you think they are going to get better if you don't put the work in.

Sorry to be harsh but your attitude is so defeatist. You are finding the counselling hard so you want to stop. What happens then? A miracle?

I've been through counselling several times, you have to battle on (although if necessary change your therapist) and get something out it. Decide what it is you want to achieve and work towards it.

Stopping will leave you where you are now or worse.

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Chubfuddler · 26/10/2012 16:57

I am so sorry you are suffering. You need to treat this in the same way you would any physical illness - the recommended treatment isn't working then you need something else. No self recrimination, no shame.

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CuppaCiggieBiccieBliss · 26/10/2012 17:13

Fuckadoodle, no I don't think you're being harsh. You are right, I am defeatist. I don't see a way to improve let alone get better. I have fought this since I was 16, I tried so damn hard not to let them win, but they have. They are still ruling my life.
Thanks Chubfuddler, I have tried with the counselling but I just don't think it's for me, but then what is.

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fuckadoodlepoopoo · 26/10/2012 17:21

How old are you now?

A different counsellor can make all the difference, or you could talk to the one you have about how you feel?

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CuppaCiggieBiccieBliss · 26/10/2012 17:36

I'm 25 now. I don't know, maybe another one would be better. I just feel like I've given all I have and they still have the same control over me. I truly don't know what else I can do.

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Chubfuddler · 26/10/2012 19:01

Counselling isn't the answer to every psychiatric/psychological problem. CBT or EDRM therapy can be better - do you have PTSD?

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Chubfuddler · 26/10/2012 19:10
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fuckadoodlepoopoo · 26/10/2012 19:15

I've done cbt too and that can be good. Can be life changing in fact.

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CuppaCiggieBiccieBliss · 26/10/2012 21:37

Sorry yes I have PTSD. I am on the waiting list for emdr but it's approx 5 months.

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CuppaCiggieBiccieBliss · 26/10/2012 21:37

Sorry yes I have PTSD. I am on the waiting list for emdr but it's approx 5 months.

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Chubfuddler · 26/10/2012 22:10

I'm no psychiatrist but my limited knowledge tells me counselling is of little to no use with PTSD. Go back to GP, get meds tweaked and chase up referral. So sorry you're going through this.

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CuppaCiggieBiccieBliss · 26/10/2012 23:02

Thankyou, I know I sound so negative but I just don't know what to do. I wish that dd's father was a decent human being. At least then I could end this knowing that she would be ok.

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Chubfuddler · 26/10/2012 23:03

No no no. You can't do that. Back to the GP.

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CuppaCiggieBiccieBliss · 29/10/2012 17:26

I can't do this at all. Everything is so damn hard. I have had enough, just don't want to be here anymore.

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CuppaCiggieBiccieBliss · 29/10/2012 17:26

I can't do this at all. Everything is so damn hard. I have had enough, just don't want to be here anymore.

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