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counselling for childhood issues

(12 Posts)
francesrivis Thu 18-Oct-12 13:23:53

Hi, just wondering if anyone has any thoughts on what type of counselling/therapy would be best for my dp. He is the youngest of four and basically it was made pretty clear to him throughout his childhood that he was a mistake and was not wanted. Unsurprisingly this has had a huge impact on him throughout his life, particularly in terms of very negative and paranoid thinking triggered by any perceived rejection/maltreatment, however minor - also heavy drinking.

I have finally persuaded him to seek counselling although it's fair to say he has a degree of trepidation/scepticism regarding this. I'm just wondering whether there is any particular therapeutic orientation that would be helpful for him, and also how you go about choosing a counsellor - I have looked online at and there are a bewildering number, I'm not sure where to start!


Salbertina Thu 18-Oct-12 14:44:55

Sorry to hear that. Psychotherapy, definitely for something like this. CBT too "on the surface" problem-fixing, in my experience - fine for that specific purpose but not here.

keekeeblue Thu 18-Oct-12 16:10:58


Your GP should be able to refer him for counselling. Just talking to someone you don't know, who won't judge you is really helpful. The counsellor will listen and offer practical self help tips. Also have heard CBT is good.

Crawling Thu 18-Oct-12 16:19:22

I have had a year of pychotherapy and 16 weeks of ACAT which is a new therapy which is now used a lot. Personally recommend Acat

Crawling Thu 18-Oct-12 16:24:09

As unlike therapy it involves you and the counselor looking at your childhood and seeing the trauma and how it effects your current mental health. Looking at the root of problems and healthier ways of problem dealing and behaving.

Salbertina Thu 18-Oct-12 16:27:41

How does that differ from psychotherapy? Feel am doing this anyway, whats ACT approach, just curious.

Crawling Thu 18-Oct-12 16:44:25

I personally having done both feel therapy is more talking and psychologist listening with a 75% patient input to 25% therapists input. ACAT is more even with pyscolgist leading and a more 50/50 split.

francesrivis Thu 18-Oct-12 17:08:47

Hi crawling, what does ACAT stand for?

Re the GP, I am drawing a bit of a blank - she said the depression and anxiety service would be able to refer him, they said they only do CBT (which as you said Salbertina I don't think is appropriate) and he would have to be referred through the GP! We don't mind going private, just wondering how to find a good therapist/counsellor

Crawling Thu 18-Oct-12 17:24:52


francesrivis Thu 18-Oct-12 18:35:37

Thanks, that's really interesting and there are a couple of therapists on the site who are very local to us - will give them a try

Crawling Thu 18-Oct-12 19:27:23

I am very glad i could help I really hope your dp finds it useful and it helps him.

ClareMarriott Thu 18-Oct-12 22:33:05

I would suggest the counselling directory or BACP who also list counsellors and their various disciplines

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