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Mental health

PTSD/anti-d's what to do?

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chickenchops · 10/12/2011 23:37

I have PND and suspected PTSD as a result of birth truma.

I was making some marginal success with talking therapy but have recently gone down hill again. The doctor is encouraging me to try anti-d's again, specifically Paxil as BF our baby still. I tried sertraline a few months ago and had a bad reaction so I'm scared.

There are also I few things I never completely disclosed to either my doctor or MHN- I used to sort of blank out and almost have what felt like out of body experiences. During these episodes I would wish I had a knife- I thought if I could see blood or feel pain I would know I was still alive. Luckily, I never did. I also would become increasingly agitated and feel that my situation was hopeless and could very much understand why people committed suicide although I truthfully never came up with a plan or anything for myself. I'm scared that going on these tablets will make me feel suicidal or that self harming would be a good idea. But I'm scared to tell either the doctor or nurse as I don't really want to bring it up- its over now. But equally I just don't want it to come back. What do I do? What will they do of they find out I have felt either of these ways in the not so distant past (baby only seven months old so I suppose even though it feels like ages it's only been a good 3-4 months).

Has anyone used antidepressants for PTSD like this and had it work well? I'm so scared of having another horrific reaction.

Help?

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