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Can't sleep, marriage falling apart...

(700 Posts)
Ineversignedupforthis Tue 18-Oct-11 05:37:56

Trying to keep it together for now. Major problems with massively entitled, passive aggressive oh, which keep coming up. Been going on and off for 20 yrs (the problems).

Have bi-polar, which is generally under control, but know I have to be careful, particularly during stress, when I can't sleep.

Am back in that cycle where I wake up at 4 in the morning, almost bang on, as if by alarm clock. Any thoughts? Any poor sod up like me?

ChildofIsis Tue 15-May-12 09:14:42

Parsley your DD could google ancient egypt to find the symbol of Isis.
It's usually a full moon resting between ox horns.
Alternatively she could do an Ankh, symbol of everlasting life.
Whatever she does is fine by me though, it's a lovely idea.

We can be the MN crew!
Who knows we may find that some of my mates are on here and I never knew.

ParsleyTheLioness Tue 15-May-12 09:18:25

Ok, thanks Isis we were going to Google, that's a help. I am Creative, in that I can see possibilities in things, but dd can carry that out directly into art work, which I alas, cannot...

ChildofIsis Tue 15-May-12 09:25:17

Hey, what's this 'I'm not creative' lark, who is the creative force behind parsley hats?

I won't let you do yourself down!!!

ParsleyTheLioness Tue 15-May-12 10:42:35

I think I see Creative as different from Arty. I am creative, not Arty....

ChildofIsis Tue 15-May-12 11:38:26

I see, so you don't do the floaty skirts sitting under a tree gazing at the sky all day thing then!!

I've always put them together but I see your meaning.
I'm not an artist but am creative around the house and garden.

Just sent off a resume of my assets to the sol and an e-mail to stbx asking him to get all his stuff valued so we can have 'realistic negotiations', copied the sol into it too.

Don't know where I stand with maintenance but thought I'd google it, I think there's an on-line calculator.

ParsleyTheLioness Tue 15-May-12 14:28:17

CSA have a calculator. Think its about 15% of take home pay, but obs more difficult to see if someone is being honest when they are self-employed.

ParsleyTheLioness Tue 15-May-12 14:44:46 is the red flags thread, btw

ChildofIsis Tue 15-May-12 16:23:04

The red flags thread made me laugh, I fell for all of them...willingly!

Well it's good to learn something new every day, and I've learned a months' worth in the past week!

I had a look on the csa etc. calculators and they all say around what I expected to, now I've got a starting point.

ChildofIsis Tue 15-May-12 17:10:36

I reckon I've had a lucky escape really.
A bit of fun is ok but I am aware that my main responsibility is to DD and her future.

There's no way anyone is going to bugger up our now comfy living arrangements.

ParsleyTheLioness Tue 15-May-12 18:40:35

Go Isis...that's the spirit!

ChildofIsis Tue 15-May-12 19:08:48

Thanks Parsley.

I give you and Pink full permission to intervene if it looks like I'm wanting to live with a man again.
Get the wet fish out and administer a slapping.

Currently I can't see that ever happening. At least not in 'my' house!
Living without a man in tow is sooo nice.

A partner living elswhere maybe fun down the line sometime but there's stuff to sort out for now.
Last weeks shenanigans showed me that I'm not ready for all that yet.

ParsleyTheLioness Tue 15-May-12 19:52:55

Years ago when I lived on my own I had a house with its own air raid shelter. I always said I wanted a man, but he could live in there, and i would bring him out for sex and to put up shelves. People assumed I was joking...

ChildofIsis Tue 15-May-12 22:43:04

I had a man that 'lived' in the attic or the shed, he turned out to be a right twat so that wouldn't suit me!!

ChildofIsis Tue 15-May-12 22:43:27

I am meaning stbx.

ChildofIsis Tue 15-May-12 22:43:54

And there wasn't much sex or diy

ParsleyTheLioness Wed 16-May-12 08:09:08

You're well rid...who did the jobs for the Company then? Did Sundry Men go and do them, rather than stbxh?

ParsleyTheLioness Wed 16-May-12 08:13:52

My stbxh's idea of trying to woo me back, after the split, was to try and persuade me AGAIN to buy a house to rent out. We had already, within the marriage, discussed and ruled this out. He couldn't look after the one he had already cos he was always in the shed fiddling with one of his two motorbikes and since he has gone I have realised how much maintenance the house is behind on... At the weekend, someone put the wall dispenser back on for kitchen roll etc, and I couldn't believe how much he had bodged even that. The house has never been painted outside, and we have been here 11 yrs...

ChildofIsis Wed 16-May-12 11:09:25

Stbx did the company work, we split the work really.
He did the stuff I wasn't able to do when he was home from his f/t work.

He hasn't painted here for around 15 years though, then only the u/s windows cos I don't like ladders. I've done all the decorating for 23 years!

I like the idea of sundry men. Unfortunately all the tradesmen I know are married or mates from years back so that's no good!

ThePinkPussycat Fri 18-May-12 01:08:23

Hi both. Not long now grin Am well, am having a sort of 'thinking' weekend, have a good one, might see you on fb tho brew

ParsleyTheLioness Fri 18-May-12 17:11:16

Ok. I am working tomorrow, and Mum and sd are coming down, and staying overnight. Will be nice to see them, but will have to tidy up! Bleddy NHS told me I would have a cheque by now...suffice to say that hasn't happened! Barstewards...

ChildofIsis Tue 29-May-12 09:51:35

So Ladies it's been over a month since we posted on here.
We seem to keep up with each other on fb now.

Don't forget the 'Thank God He Left' Party on monday 11am onwards.
I'll pm you both on fb with address, postcode etc.

Really looking forward to meeting you both, DD can't wait to meet The Pink Pussycat and Parsley The Lioness!!

ChildofIsis Tue 29-May-12 09:52:01

I didn't mean a month, duh!

ThePinkPussycat Fri 01-Jun-12 13:25:47

I have to post here, so I can use the Jubilee emoticon grin

Looking forward to seeing you on Monday, when as it says in Alice Through the Looking Glass, we'll all be queens together, and it'll all be feasting and fun.

crown crown crown

ChildofIsis Sat 02-Jun-12 08:06:14


I'm really looking forward to it, lots of people invited but don't know who's coming at what time.

I do hope it's dry.
My lovely neighbours have decorated our shared yard with ribbons and bunting, looks fab.

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