where to find the strength?

[sarah876]

I am spiralling into depression, I'm not coping at all and fantasize about running away or taking my life, my husband was killed four years ago and although I'm not grieving no more I've got to the point where i don't want to do anything.
I've had lots of traumatic stuff happen and I feel I'm lost....I have 3 children and live with my partner....i have tried talking to him but I hid how I'm feeling. My mother is dying of cancer and my eldest son has aspergers syndrome, he is refusing to go to school and ive just reported him missing as he didnt come home last night, he is 14. My financial situation is f**cked and i'm not opening my bills.....I know what I have to do but avoid doing it. Ive tried antidepressants but they make me implusive and make me feel worse.....I just don't know what to do.....arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

[mondaymorning]

Hi Sarah, you poor thing. I felt like running away about two years ago so have some idea how that feels. You must talk to someone and get some support. Please see your gp, you may not want ads but there are methods to help you with depression eg: CBT or counselling.

Is your son home now? Have you spoken to his teachers?

As far as your financial situation, is your partner not helping you deal with it. Could he make an appointment at CAB to sort this out.

How old are your other children?

Sorry to hear about your mum. My dad had cancer and I just felt so bloody useless.

Hope you are ok.