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Mental health

Can anyone talk to me about PND?

10 replies

Bumperlicioso · 16/06/2011 22:31

I am 8 months post natal with DD2, and for about 3 months have been on antidepressants, fluoxetine.

Originally I wasn't convinced I actually had PND, but DD2 was/is a terrible sleeper and I was really struggling, I was incredibly impatient with DD1, really to walk out of the house when DD2 was refusing to sleep, on my knees with tiredness. I couldn't do much about her sleep, but I thought I could change how I deal with it so I asked the Dr for ADs. They have massively helped, as has DD2 sleeping a bit better. However there are still some things that are bugging me. I'm procrastinating a lot, forgetting birthdays and admin stuff, or just not being organised/bothered enough to deal with it, even when I know I should be. I'm more antisocial than usual, I'm v outgoing but a lot of the time I just want to slob around in my PJ's at home, and the more I do that the more lethargic I get.

I really need to get on and do some exercise, but despite being unhappy with my weight I just can't seem to muster up the motivation.

The ADs are definitely helping. I'm not on the edge like I was before, and miserable. I'm not mum of the year but I am much more relaxed with DD1 (who at nearly 4, and appparently suffering some delayed sibling rivalry is pretty challenging at the moment). Does the other stuff just sound like tiredness and the relentlessness of being a home with young children? I go back to work next month, and am not particularly looking forward to it, but I know I don't want to be at home full time. I'm just fed up with not being 'me' and look forward to getting this stage out of the way.

I guess I just want to know if this is normal, or symptoms of PND. I felt similar with DD1 and was given some ADs to try then which I didn't take in the end for various reasons, and sort of just let it run it's course. But I was determined to enjoy this mat leave much more. While I am enjoying DD2 as a baby much more, I still feel as if I am sleepwalking through life, wasting it just trying to get to the end of the day when I can crawl into bed, anxious, as I never know when I will be woken up.

Sorry for the ramble, just could do with hearing other people's experiences.

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Bumperlicioso · 17/06/2011 09:46

Bump

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pleasethanks · 17/06/2011 14:52

My DD is 9 months old and I was diagnosed with PND when she was about 5 and half months. I am on the same tablets as you and they have made a real difference to me. I also started counselling and that was a huge help.

I had been finding it all very relentless, boring, exhausting etc, but now I can honestly say I am enjoying it and have motivation to get out and do things and meet people. Which is not something I wanted to do before.

My DD was a shite napper for the first few months and I am in no doubt that led, in part, to my spiral into depression.

All my admin fell by the wayside when I was bad, but I have started picking it up again and feel really good for getting stuff done. I have been writing lots of 'to do' lists with lots of unremarkable things on it (but things that need done never the less, such as 'post mail') but it makes me feel good being able to tick things on the list. And that motivates me more to do other, bigger and better, things.

So, from my experience I would say some of what you are feeling is PND. But the thing is, and this is what I struggle with, how on earth can one be all singing, dancing and cartwheeling through life when one is sleep deprived? But, I do think there are things that can be done to alleviate some of the anxiety and I would encourage you to get some help - maybe counselling or CBT. You don't need to live like this.

Feel free to PM me if you like.

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Bumperlicioso · 17/06/2011 19:55

Thanks for the reply. The thing is I don't really feel doom and gloom like I would expect to feel with pnd. Though that may be the ad's working, before that it wasn't so much as doom and gloom as hysteria! Now I just feel a bit like I am sleep walking, just wading through life. It's hard to tell if that is the sleep deprivation, flattened affect from the ads or just life with young kids.

I'm not sure I need counselling or cbt, though I had a few sessions with a counsellor when I had dd1 and did need it then. This feels more physical iykwim?

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CountBapula · 17/06/2011 20:16

Hi Bumper. I found the CBT really helpful. I stopped feeling depressed a good month before DS started sleeping better. Now that he has, I have so much more motivation. I did a load of sorting and tidying today, which I never would have done a month ago.

I do think that the effects of sleep deprivation and exhaustion on mental health cannot be underestimated. You and I have months of sleep to catch up on!

Hope you feel better soon.

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pleasethanks · 17/06/2011 20:51

But the physical and mental are so connected, I don't think they can be looked at as separate things. I felt like I was going through the motions before, not really living. I felt flat. My ADs and counselling changed that.

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Bumperlicioso · 18/06/2011 15:05

The thing is a counselling would just go

"Tell me what's wrong"
"I'm tired"
"How does that make you feel?"
"Tired"

(disclaimer: I have a masters in Psychology so I do know counselling is more than that!)

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pleasethanks · 18/06/2011 17:57

Try it, what have you got to lose?

I find it nice even just to have an hour away and to talk about me.

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Bumperlicioso · 18/06/2011 19:23

Should I speak to my gp?

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CountBapula · 18/06/2011 20:09

Yes, definitely. I got my referral through quite quickly. The thing I found good about CBT was working with the therapist to set goals each session for the next couple of weeks. It kind of forced me to do things to help myself, IYSWIM. It isn't sort of talky-on-the-couch counselling - it's more action-orientated. It's really, really helped me.

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pleasethanks · 19/06/2011 15:14

To be honest with my GP it was me that suggested the counselling, she simply suggested ADs. I self referred to a local PND organisation who offer counselling. But prod best to see your GP in the first instance.

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