Please help me...
I am divorcing DH as he's been abusing me for years. From what I've read, it's the typical scenario - amazing 1st six months, then gradually, slowly it started:
- Financial Abuse
- Verbal Attacks & Abuse
- Emotional Abuse
- Physical Abuse
11 years on, I finally got fed up of the cycle, the apologies - only for it to start again, just a bit worse with each cycle. My doctor has told me I'm close to a breakdown. DH is now abusing me using the legal system, making the divorce as awful as possible. Although I've been assured that once we get to court the judge will throw the book at him. But he has successfully bullied us (us=me, DD-5 & DS-4) out of our home and I'm now in my mum & dad's spare bedroom with DD & DS as his financial abuse of me has left me in debt to the tune of 25k :-o
Tonight, my mum saw my DD on the sofa, legs akimo, rubbing herself with both hands. My mum said to her - Oh no love, ladies don't do that! She told my mum "But daddy does it to me and I love it"
So I said to my mum, don't panic (she was understandably extremely shocked) it could hopefully be something simple like when she has a sore bum and she's had bum cream put on.
So, I casually chatted to her - when she touched my food I just said to her calmly "I hope you washed your hands after touching your bottom, grandma said you'd touched your bum". She said "Yes mummy, I did". I said, was it your back bottom you were touching? If so, I hope you washed your hands with soap. She said no, I wasn't touching my bum, so I said to her - "Can you tell mummy or show mummy?" (obviously getting more and more worried) She said, "No, I can't - it's rude"
I really don't know what to make of this. Should I make anything of this?
I feel completely distroyed that this could have happened under my nose without me having a clue!
What do I do?
Do I do anything?
How can I approach her again without making her feel uncomfortable?
Who can I ask for help?
