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It's a disaster

(9 Posts)
tooodlepip Sun 08-Oct-17 02:49:12

Hi

I think I would love some support or someone to listen to me moan I honestly don't know I'm just going go to go with this.

I have my first period in I think almost 10 years previously I've had a pregnancy or a mirena. I've taken the mirena out I've always since having my first baby had pnd/depression so after all these years I want to be hormone free.

It's a disaster I have forgotten all about periods and having to sleep in a pad tmi. Then added on top of that the idea of even getting my shit together enough to take my temp every day and then record it into a bloody app. Apparently on green days you don't need a condom I'm terrified to trust that I don't want another baby yet. On the subject of condoms I haven't a freaking clue and neither does the manshape he been living the good life all this time while I suffered a constant stream of hormones. So 2 condom attempts have been made and both were a disaster I think the second attempt I snapped it against him like an elastic band and actually grazed his Willy. I panicked enough to get the map.

I promise you I'm a grown up I have a job and 3 children and now I feel like a hopeless teen getting to grips with all this stuff again and I actually almost wish I was a man.

So to the advice request part if you have managed to read on. Natural family planning does it actually work and what are my options contraception wise as right now I'm resigned to never having sex again ever in life but that's probably just how I'm feeling right now.

Honestly feeling greener than the grass here is that still a phrase? Lol

Thanks

MaisyPops Sun 08-Oct-17 03:06:32

No practical advice as such but feel for you. flowers

If me and DH used condoms pre TTC then he would always put it on.

Once we finally get a BFP we are going to shift to natural family planning so i'm interested in advice other people give.

CakesRUs Sun 08-Oct-17 03:15:05

In the 30 years I've been with my husband we practiced withdrawal contraception (occasionally condoms) and I didn't have a pregnancy that wasn't planned. Obviously there were times of the month that we took more care about. I think you need to trust that your partner will withdraw, I've had mates who have said it wouldn't work for them and it is a bit of Russian roulette. I'm pro abortion, but my husband knew, if it ever failed, I wouldn't terminate because we would've been able to have other kids during this time - I think that was the clincher to him never "slipping up" for all those years grin

tooodlepip Sun 08-Oct-17 03:23:47

Thanks for taking the time to read I think withdrawal will be the way forward. Now if I can stop being overdramatic about having a normal period. I must confess I'm actually how the hell will I wake up on mon morning for work and do normal shit.

In my mind I think I thought the mirena would come out and I would instantly lose 2 stone and a super happy energetic person. I can live in hope I suppose.

Yes please more natural family planning ideas all are much appreciated

tooodlepip Sun 08-Oct-17 03:25:03

I'm actually thinking* is what that should say not doing it very well I think bear

yikesanotherbooboo Sun 08-Oct-17 04:09:17

You could use Condon’s every time you have sex; that way you will become more expert in their use. Then if you want to leave them off on a clear day you can. Don’t use withdrawal on a day on which you might be fertile.
Natural family planning with condoms on top can work well but it takes a few months to build up expertise about your fertile window.
Condom use is not as effective as the mirena so you need to take on board the extra risk of pregnancy if you choose to have intercourse at your fertile time.

Cupcakegirl13 Sun 08-Oct-17 04:16:37

Natural family planning will always be risky , practice with condoms and if you're totally done with babies would your husband consider a vasectomy ?

SerendipityFelix Sun 08-Oct-17 04:22:29

I’d second just using condoms all the time so it becomes routine. This is what we do, I have been hormone free for years now and very happy with it. And it’s his job to put a condom on securely, or no PIV, simples. In 2.5 years we’ve had one accident, when we bust the condom, MAP sorted that. I track my cycles with the ‘clue’ app (only one I could find that wasn’t pink and flowery hmm) and I think it’s pretty accurate for my fertile window, I sometimes get sharp ovulation pain and when I check it’s often on the day the app has marked as ovulation day.

Don’t be too hard on yourself for not enjoying your period btw! Periods can suck! I have got the mooncup love though, can just pop it in and forget about it most of the time.

Honey2468 Sat 21-Oct-17 08:45:03

You could try a copper coil as it has no hormones. I think it is supposed to make your periods worse though. I had it pushed onto me and apart from 4 days I bled (very heavily) for the whole five weeks it was in. The reason I got it out was the pain though. The cramps were so bad they would go up into my ribs and my back like the sort of pain you get when you have a stitch but it doesn't shift. Dr eventually convinced me this sort of pain wasn't normal and to have it removed plus my partner could feel it and hated it so it was never going to serve its purpose. But if the mirena worked for you and you were ok with the period side of things. I know it sounds strange but I hung onto it for so long in the hopes of it working because I didn't feel that horrible crappy way I do when I'm told to take hormone stuff. I completely felt like myself the whole time. Hope this helps!

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