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Any ideas how I can track down my cousin quickly?

(9 Posts)
thegirlwiththecurl Fri 28-Aug-09 13:23:21

I am probably clutching at straws here, but....

Long history but basically, my maternal uncle had a turbulent life, dogged by mental illness and alchoholism. He was married and had two children - a boy and a girl, the girl born in the same year as me. Due to his various problems, they separated and his ex didn't want much to do with him so he had very little contact with his children. My mum did keep in contact with them, though and when she died, the girl, my cousin,came to the funeral - first time I had seen her in ages - and she kept in contact with my dad, even inviting him to her wedding a year or two back. His son wanted nothing to do with this side of the family.

My uncle and my mum were very close and I got close to him when my mum died. He died 3 yrs ago and I arranged the funeral etc. I tried to contact the girl through my dad, but it was too late and, according to my dad, she expressed regret that she hadn't been at her dad's funeral.

Anyway...three years on, I have finally got round to arranging to do something with his ashes and I would really like to contact her to see if she wants to come along. No pressure - she really doesn't have to do anything - but I would like her to know that she can if she wants. However dad has now lost all the contact details he had for her so all I know is her first name and the city where she lives.

I don't know whether it is possible to contact her - any ideas? I have always thought it may be nice for us to meet up and chat about things. I was very close to her dad and I do appreciate that it was very difficult for her as a child as he was a different person in a lot of ways and not a good father figure. I don't know if she will want to meet up, but she has kept ties with this family to some extent and although she nbever contacted me, I have never tried before to contact her either, so it may not be that she doesn't want to but just she hasn't felt able to etc. There really would be no pressure on her to come etc, but I feel I owe it to her to at least try.

Any ideas? P.S. sorry about long OP!!

OP’s posts: |
FluffySaysTheDailyMailsShite Fri 28-Aug-09 13:28:10

Do you know what job she did? Where she worked? Have you tried Grandparents?

racmac Fri 28-Aug-09 13:37:00

Have you a full name and date of birth? You could probably trace her with that?

Do you know what school she went to? Friends reunited? Facebook?

thegirlwiththecurl Fri 28-Aug-09 13:42:48

Thanks for the quick replies - beginning to feel it is impossible. I don't have a full name - her maiden name may have been the same as her dad's, which is a very common one, but when her mum and dad divorced she may well have gone back to her mum's surname as it was very acrimonious. I am digging through all my uncle's stuff to find clues. i have found some photos of her as a child - one in a school uniform.

Granparents both dead - and, in any case, both my mum and uncle were put into a childrens home before they were three. My uncle stayed in one all his childhood, my mum was adopted. They did get in contact with their biological parents, but it was very strained to say the least. My mum's adoptive parents also long gone.

Will keep digging, but loosing optimism.

OP’s posts: |
thegirlwiththecurl Fri 28-Aug-09 13:44:49

she did do a degree in law, though - my dad told me that - don't know whether that helps

OP’s posts: |
FluffySaysTheDailyMailsShite Fri 28-Aug-09 13:46:58

You could try the Law society, their web site has a list of practicing lawyers and barristers, you can narrow it down by using the area where she lives and her first name.

thegirlwiththecurl Fri 28-Aug-09 13:49:55

thank you - what a good idea - will do that now

OP’s posts: |
FluffySaysTheDailyMailsShite Fri 28-Aug-09 13:50:37


good luck!!

bigstripeytiger Fri 28-Aug-09 13:53:51

Or if you know the university and the year she graduated you could check the graduation lists, or use that information to serch facebook or friends reunited.

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