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Something to help 7yo dd emotionally and socially?

(24 Posts)
OhWhatAPalaver Tue 15-Jan-19 18:58:35

Dd is on the spectrum. Not completely through the diagnosis yet but on our way. We think she has Aspergers/HFA. As she struggles emotionally, particularly with empathy, I would like her to do something that teaches how to be kind and help others and how to consider others feelings etc, while at the same time being fun and interesting. Does such a thing exist?

BouleBaker Tue 15-Jan-19 19:05:25

Have a look at the Perform drama group and see if they do anything near you. Lots of emphasis is focus skills and building confidence.

sleepismysuperpower1 Tue 15-Jan-19 19:05:45

would something like woodcraft folk suit? i have linked their website of the age group she would be in (6-9), so you can see what sort of things she would be doing x

OhWhatAPalaver Tue 15-Jan-19 21:13:57

Thanks, she already does a drama club, she likes it but she is far from a natural bless her! The woodcraft folk things looks good though, thanks for the link. smile

riotlady Tue 15-Jan-19 21:21:56

I’ve seen quite a few SEN schools and autism charities/services run Lego Clubs as a means to get children socialising, it might be worth looking to see if there’s anything similar in your area? School senco might know.

Brownies might also be good?

WrongKindOfFace Tue 15-Jan-19 21:25:47

I was also going to suggest brownies or beavers/cubs. Good for teamwork and learning to work together to achieve something.

Frostyapples Tue 15-Jan-19 21:27:47

I work with children with A variety of SEN in mainstream school and I have asked our educational psychologist a very similar question to yours. Their answer was to value whatever the child was interested in and support and encourage them in that. It helps them feel valued and gives more opportunities for socialising with people who share your interest. We have a Lego club run by a trained therapist which is excellent, but doesn't suit everyone.

Blueberryblueberry Tue 15-Jan-19 21:44:53

Rainbows/brownies would be good - lots of games and also little 'community focussed' type sessions at my local group such as donating to the food bank, making flower pots for a residential home etc and a local pcso came to visit once to talk about what the police do and how they help people? Might be worth a go?

confusednorthner Tue 15-Jan-19 22:01:26

Brownies might be good for her, dd is on the spectrum and has gone right through Rainbows, Brownies and now Guides.

Zoomzoomzoomzoom0 Tue 15-Jan-19 22:26:20

Horse riding? Horses are very sensitive to people's moods /feelings, so you have to be in tune with them too.

OhWhatAPalaver Tue 15-Jan-19 23:18:04

Thanks for the replies. If only she was in to horses, her grandma would love that! But she's very wary at the moment. That could improve with age and practice though I guess.
Wasn't sure re: brownies. She not much in to the whole 'god thing' (she's very logical and literal) and I thought the whole promise and prayer thing might be off putting for her. Also it seems to end up expensive what with all the trips and stuff.
She loves lego though, that could be great for her! smile

budgiegirl Tue 15-Jan-19 23:40:35

she not much in to the whole 'god thing' (she's very logical and literal) and I thought the whole promise and prayer thing might be off putting for her. Also it seems to end up expensive what with all the trips and stuff

Brownies are not a religious organisation - I believe the promise has been changed to reflect this? - some units may be affiliated to a. Church hall or similar, but many hardly mention religion at all , except for the occasional ‘learning about the world/community’ activity.

Brownies and Cubs tend to be one of the cheapest activities a child can do. Subs tend to work out at about £2-£4 per week, and a lot of the extra activities can be very reasonably priced, as the leaders are all volunteers which tends to keep prices down. If there are more expensive trips, the unit is often able to help out with costs for families who are finding it difficult to afford.

OhWhatAPalaver Wed 16-Jan-19 06:42:18

Ah ok, that's not too bad then. Thanks for the info.

Cauliflowersqueeze Wed 16-Jan-19 06:43:21

I was going to suggest horses as well. Helping out at a local sanctuary.

AlbusPercival Wed 16-Jan-19 06:45:11

WHat about the St. John’s ambulance badgers? Literally learning to care for other people

ratherbeshowjumping Wed 16-Jan-19 07:06:55

I came on to suggest horses too.
If she is currently undergoing diagnosis, it may be an idea to contact the RDA & find the closest group to you.
https://www.rda.org.uk/rda-groups/
She will come on leaps & bounds socially & emotionally.

Beamur Wed 16-Jan-19 07:09:55

Not all Brownie/Guide groups are churchy. The God bit in the promise can be left out.

sleepismysuperpower1 Wed 16-Jan-19 19:22:19

Woodcraft folk is not 'churchy' at all smile

CinnamonToaster Thu 17-Jan-19 17:45:55

We have gone down Frostyapple's route. Beavers was an absolute fail here. Cricket suits him infinitely better and we really see the best of him when he's doing something he loves. It gives him a peg to hang his hat on which he really needs.

I don't think it need to be specifically trying to teach kindness to help her. You can find social "learning opportunities" in most things. Our cricket team is run by volunteers who are amazing role models, and he is learning a lot from hanging around with his team mates while their side is batting. They are expected to help with collecting equipment etc, they take turns to captain and take it all very seriously, it's just a really lovely environment. But I firmly believe it's not about the choice of activity, it's the individual club and the individual people who run it. Find the right leaders, a small enough group for her to find her feet, and a hobby that catches her imagination.

PinotAndPlaydough Thu 17-Jan-19 20:25:52

My 7 year old ASD daughter absolutely adores beavers, I really can’t recommend it enough. Lots of the badges involve team work and helping other. The activities my daughter does are so much fun and she has made brilliant friends there. She’s really blossomed there.

OhWhatAPalaver Fri 18-Jan-19 21:32:24

Thanks for all the replies everyone, really helpful stuff smile

BringOnTheScience Sat 19-Jan-19 00:44:58

Guiding - "I promise that I will do my best: to be true to myself and develop my beliefs..." No gods. Scouting has alternative wordings to choose.

But do please talk through your DD's issues with the leaders before she starts. It's v disappointing how many parents don't bother!

CinnamonToaster Sat 19-Jan-19 00:52:24

BringOnTheScience it's really nice to hear that. I always worry that I'm taking up too much of their time. I tend to err on the side of giving too much information I think! It's one of the upsides of having a diagnosis. Before, we tied ourselves in knots for years wondering if things were actually normal for his age, and if we were being paranoid etc ... it's surprisingly difficult to take the leap and say to strangers that you think your child may have additional needs.

yaela123 Sat 19-Jan-19 10:50:04

I think Brownies could be great for her too. Our unit meet in a church hall but are not religious at all. Do lots of crafts, outdoor stuff, games, songs, community action etc so a bit of everything. Of course it will depend on the individual unit and leaders so it would be best to have a chat with them first about how best to support your DD.

The promise changed a while ago, it is now:
I promise to do my best
To be true to myself and develop my beliefs
To serve the queen and my community
To help other people
And to keep the Brownie Guide law

(The law is A Brownie Guide thinks of others before herself and does a good turn every day)

Happy to answer any more questions smile

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