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Fat people in the gym....

103 replies

TidyGOLDDancer · 06/10/2012 16:03

First of all, I don't intend that title to be offensive to anyone. I have been specifically asked to use it by (and I quote) "a fat person" in order to get raw reactions and opinions. I am not a troll, some of you may recognise my name so hopefully you will know I am not a horrible person on here!

My friend is going to start coming to the gym with me as of Monday. I couldn't be happier. She is great company and I can't wait to have a gym buddy. DP is crap as he lurks in the strength room most of the time and is totally antisocial. My friend is ace and I am really pleased she is going to come and work out with me.

The 'problem' (her words, not mine) is that she is quite overweight and really worried that she's going to be made fun of. My experience of the gym is that this really isn't the truth. I have never seen anyone of any size being made fun of. I have seen young and old and little and large and all manner in between people in the gym and no one gives a shit what anyone else looks like or does (unless they hog a particular piece of equipment or take tonnes of calls on their mobiles!).

Please could anyone who goes to the gym help me convince my friend of the above? She's really looking foward to coming with me, but is nervous and needs convincing! Again, I really hope my use of specific words has not offended anyone, my friend has asked me to post this and use those words!

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TidyGOLDDancer · 06/10/2012 16:05

P.S. I weighed nearly 19 stone when I started using the gym, and I didn't get the negativity then. My silly yet lovely friend does not believe me!

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maebyfunke · 06/10/2012 16:05

Everyone is there to make improvements to their body and health and are generally to busy concentrating on themselves to take much notice of other people!

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Pagwatch · 06/10/2012 16:05

No one laughs at overweight people in my gym. I have never seen anyone peering or sneering at anyone else.

Most people in a gym completely understand the determination it takes to go there and work out when sitting on the sofa eating buns is much more tempting so I think we tend to respect each other. That's how I feel anyway.

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QuintessentialShadows · 06/10/2012 16:06

I am fat. (ish) Size 16. I have never been made fun of. I have seen plenty of people much fatter than me, and nobody has batted an eyelid. Aside from me, maybe, in relief that I am not the only one..... Wink

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cocolepew · 06/10/2012 16:06

I find nobody pays any attention to anyone else.

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TidyGOLDDancer · 06/10/2012 16:08

Brilliant responses so far! Thank you all!

My perspective, both when I was at my biggest and when I have been much smaller, has been the same as the majority. No one gives a shit about anyone else. They are all there to do their own thing and they don't care about what anyone else looks like or does.

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MissKeithLemon · 06/10/2012 16:08

This is for OP's friend - NO ONE WILL CARE ABOUT YOUR SIZE IN THE GYM Grin

Bless her though, until I had been inside my gym I would've thought the same to be honest, but the reality is that everyone is there for a workout; all shapes and sizes.

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melliebobs · 06/10/2012 16:08

I work on an exercise referral scheme and the majority of my patients are overweight. (bmi 40+) and this is the main barrier I come across.

No one will be laughing/pointing. If weights an issue she's in the right place doing something about it! The first visit is usually the worst but after that most of my patients have found that people are too busy doing their workout/faffing with their phones/watching the TV to care what anyone else looks like or is doing! Also they are surprised at the mix of people that go. Fat/thin young old and it's great she'll have a supportive friend to go with Grin

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azazello · 06/10/2012 16:09

I occasionally notice and think good on them.

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Bumply · 06/10/2012 16:09

I was over 18 st when I started losing weight and gym was part of that.
People in the gym tend to be very focused on themselves - no judging that I've ever seen/heard. I lost 4st and have put a bit back on, but kept majority off. I now go running and take part in races. My race photos show I'm still a larger lady, but I think of it as showing I'm an achievable example. Did my first half marathon in September.

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Mosman · 06/10/2012 16:10

People are generally too busy admiring themselves in all the mirrors ime

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UnChartered · 06/10/2012 16:10

IME everyone is far too worried about what they look like to even look up

good luck to your friend

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MarchelineWhatNot · 06/10/2012 16:10

People are far too concerned with checking out themselves than looking at anyone else, IME.

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GoldShip · 06/10/2012 16:10

Aw! Tell her not to worry, and good on her for going in the first place. I really need to get back but mega busy with two jobs and college and I'm too lazy

As long as she's not like one girl who went to my gym. Who plonked herself on the machine I wanted, for twenty minutes doing nothing except watching the tv on the wall and drinking a can of full fat coke.

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BrandyAlexander · 06/10/2012 16:11

I know someone who started going to the gym a few months ago. Size 24 (I think) and was absolutely terrified for the same reasons as your friends. She loves it and goes 3 nights a week now. I second what everyone else says, nobody pays attention to anyone else! Hope she comes with you.

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azazello · 06/10/2012 16:11

Sorry - to add. I notice because my mum is obese (25 stone +/-) but actually does quite a bit of exercise. She's doing very well with swimming and although she doesn't particularly lose weight (because the exercise is immediately made up for in bread and jam) she is in much better shape than many people of her age and size.

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DreamsTurnToGoldDust · 06/10/2012 16:12

No, my gym has all sizes, all ages no one really takes notice of each other. I started at size 18 and was nervous when I first went in, but took one look around and relaxed. Good on your friend, she`ll be fine.

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Svrider · 06/10/2012 16:16

I think she must niece

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Psiren · 06/10/2012 16:19

I have just joined the gym this week. I weigh 118kgs (18s8lb) I am hugely self conscious but have realised that without the exercise I am only going to get fatter. I am sure no one cares but if they do it is their problem not mine. I am really enjoying it so far despite my poor aching limbs and I know it will be worth it in the long run. Good luck to your friend op.

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TidyGOLDDancer · 06/10/2012 16:20

Bumply - that's brilliant! I aim to work towards a half marathon in the next year. Well done!

My friend is really excited about coming with me, but I feel she's letting this worry taint that. I am so happy she's joining in because she's a brilliant friend and such a laugh to spend time with. I think we will keep each other motivated.

Thanks for all the replies!

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Kopparbergkate · 06/10/2012 16:24

I am a mature (and fat!) student - this is relevant because I go to the university gym whose entire clientele seem to be gorgeous, thin, pert under 20s... I have never, ever seem anyone even glance in my direction. If there's no issues in that environment, your friend will definitely be fine in a normal gym where there are all shapes, sizes and ages.

I love going to the gym now, and that's such a turn round for me.

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Pochemuchka · 06/10/2012 16:26

Agree with all the posters who say everyone is too concerned with themselves to be laughing at anyone else!
Most people I know look at overweight people and think 'good on them!'.

The only eye rolling I have ever seen is in the direction of those muscly men who hog the weights and mirrors grunting at themselves, but even that is rare.

Good luck!

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dexter73 · 06/10/2012 16:27

Nobody makes fun of anybody in our gym and I would be surprised if anyone did. We have all sorts of shapes,sizes and ages. I don't really take much notice of who else is there.

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Februarytwotimes · 06/10/2012 16:28

I don't notice anyone at the gym, I am too busy doing my own thing. I think that applies to just about everyone.

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Littlefish · 06/10/2012 16:28

I've lost 5 stone in the last 2 years and go to the gym once or twice a week. I'm still a size 16-18, so still got a long way to go in my desire for fitness and a healthy weight.

I can honestly say that I've never encountered any negativity at all. When I see people there who are the same size, or bigger than me, I think "excellent, well done for coming".

The only problem I have with going to the gym is that I never sweat, not even after an hour on the bike with my heart rate at 120 beats per minute. I get very very envious of anyone at the gym who gets really sweaty! I just go bright red and look like my head is going to explode. Grin

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