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Does anyone else find themselves getting more sympathetic to the other side

(430 Posts)
whydidhesaythat Mon 11-Jul-16 20:59:20

I don't know if this is just another stage in the cycle of grief but I'm starting to feel that:

Those of us who were doing very nicely out of Europe thank you ignored those who didn't

EU money can go into buildings but that's not the same thing as helping people

People outside the urban centres felt the EU was just another siphon of power away from them

London patronises the regions

Not everyone got to go on a gap year to a European country so why should they be bothered about my kids having one?

There actually is a non racist anti immigration argument

I'm not saying any of this right, it may just be another reaction....but does anyone else find themselves empathising with the other side more than they did?

Iamthegreatest1 Mon 11-Jul-16 21:04:43

I can only smile.
The number of times someone has posted about their kids future being taken away by bloody Brexiters; No longer able to study in Europe, settle in Europe wink they're obviously assuming these options are open to everyone.

MiaowJario Mon 11-Jul-16 21:07:58

Well Why I voted Remain, but just. You've just given a very decent summary of the reasons for it being a hard decision for me.

The amount of vicious, hysterical "dumb chavs should not be allowed to vote as they don't even understand the issues" bike that has poured out from some quarters since the vote has just underlined to me how unheard and bullied a lot of sections of the community are. So I understand why any vote for change was an attractive option, as they had been so effectively marginalised and disenfranchised at other elections for so long.

Sadly, I think that there has been a lot of manipulation and that those voters won't get anything like the outcome they were promised. They'll just get kicked again.

MiaowJario Mon 11-Jul-16 21:08:37

I meant bile not bike.

Namehanger Mon 11-Jul-16 21:09:16

Iamthegreatest - no empathy then ?

Peregrina Mon 11-Jul-16 21:10:23

No, I don't. I voted Remain and just about all the prominent Leave campaigners have cleared off. I am disgusted with them.

whydidhesaythat Mon 11-Jul-16 21:11:12

I guess I am admitting that so yes...

It's a bit like how I would get upset if they stopped doing cello lessons at school ;)

That's just me of course. It goes all the way from mild inconvenience for me to life and death to others.

MiaowJario Mon 11-Jul-16 21:12:02

The Labour Party seems intent on continuing to think that it is a vehicle to get a few people nice jobs in politics/consultancy whilst ensuring their kids get internships in Brussels. And not actually doing anything for the working classes in the UK. Who should just be grateful they still wear red rosettes.

whydidhesaythat Mon 11-Jul-16 21:12:11

Sorry that was to Iamthegreatest

Iamthegreatest1 Mon 11-Jul-16 21:12:28

Empathy about what?

DiggersRest Mon 11-Jul-16 21:12:40

lam they are, or were, open to everyone confused

Iamthegreatest1 Mon 11-Jul-16 21:13:44

OP you have quite succinctly hit the nail on the head.

NameChanger22 Mon 11-Jul-16 21:14:27

I think I'm less sympathetic to the leavers than I was 2 weeks ago.

Iamthegreatest1 Mon 11-Jul-16 21:14:59

May have been open but were they accessible?

DiggersRest Mon 11-Jul-16 21:16:29

Well the option was there for everyone. Whether you took it up or not is another thing.

BertrandRussell Mon 11-Jul-16 21:16:47

"it goes all the way from mild inconvenience for me to life and death to others."

I do hope it stays at mild inconvenience for you and all of us. I have never in my life more wanted to be proved wrong.

whydidhesaythat Mon 11-Jul-16 21:16:58

Couldn't agree more about Johnson, Gove, Loathesome etc!

I like to think I would physically attack Johnson but he'd probably disarm me with a pun.

But they are obviously only three of the voters...

Cinnamon2013 Mon 11-Jul-16 21:17:18

I know what you mean, OP. This is going to sound crap but I really didn't appreciate how in many of the areas outside the capital there was no sense of bouncing back from the last recession. And yes, Of course you love Europe if you have the money to enjoy the best of it. Some Remainers have been patronising and made assumptions. I was probably one of them.

However, I've also realised, sadly, that there are a whole lot of genuinely racist (in an 'I'm not-racist' way) people, including acquaintances. For them - the UKIP voters and the immigrant haters - my disdain and, well, disgust, has increased.

Namehanger Mon 11-Jul-16 21:18:05

I sort of understand why they voted but am still amazed that they don't get:
- 90% of the issues are to with UK governments who have devastated their communities not the EU
- that they don't understand that a 50% referendum is no way to decide a major constitutional development

After all with my degree in history and politics, A level in Economics, post grad in law and strong interest in politics hardly touch the sides with all the issues. So why should anyone think they have got a bloody clue on what to vote and what the implications are.

So yes I sort of get why this shit storm happened but a little more humility from the 'winning' side would be useful.

BertrandRussell Mon 11-Jul-16 21:19:34

"Of course you love Europe if you have the money to enjoy the best of it"

Sorry? I really don't understand........

Namehanger Mon 11-Jul-16 21:21:35

Iamthe greatest - empathy that your decision means that young people will not be able to study in Europe? Why would you wish them a lack of opportunity?

smallfox2002 Mon 11-Jul-16 21:24:41

Yeah, I imagine in the future there will be a lot of people who didn't realise they had reasons to love the EU, but now do.

Sadly that boat will have sailed.

Into the sunset, with the futures of the poorest, and the middle, but fuck it eh, as long as we are all in the same boat eh?

I notice too that the most vocal leavers on here have vanished, the ones that were here day after day, on every thread and that many of the things they put down to scaremongering have come true.


Oh Iam.. everyone had the opportunity to do all the things you identified, if you didn't take them it was down to you.

whydidhesaythat Mon 11-Jul-16 21:25:34


The studying in EU thing

It's nice, but it's less important than communities like Sunderland having a higher number of secure jobs to replace the old heavy industry jobs.

So a campaign promoting EU study would have gone down like a lead balloon....

UnderTheGreenwoodTree Mon 11-Jul-16 21:27:56

No. Quite the opposite. I voted remain, and before the vote had a fair amount of understanding towards people who wanted to leave.

But now, I see more racist attacks, I'm called sore loser, stop weeping, get over it etc, and I'm very angry. There was no plan, and prominent Leave campaigners have run for the hills. No one seems able to tell me what 'Leave' will actually mean, because nobody knows - yet I'm told to stop weeping, it'll be fine. The significant number of lies and promises-that-won't-be-kept told by the Leave campaign have come to light.

I have not once called Leave voters thick or stupid, I have asked a few to look at the right-wing extremists (BNP, Britain First, Farage, Arron Banks etc) that they were on the same side with though. I believe you should always be careful about who you stand with.

whydidhesaythat Mon 11-Jul-16 21:28:04


I don't agree that everyone had the chance.

From a comfortable background - yes.
From a poor community - only the most determined, lucky and persistent.

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