Hello everyone and thanks in advance for any help and advice.
I have been looking for a while at getting a bigger property for my family to live in. My partner and I have 2 children aged 4 and almost 2. My oldest is due to start school next year in August. We currently live in a 2 bed flat which we are outgrowing on a daily basis. I want our family to have what I had as a child and what my partner had as a child and that is a house of our own. Upstairs, downstairs, a private back garden in an area where it will be safe for our kids to play outdoors. I have spoken to a new build company and we match the criteria for a scheme which is going to enable us to get a house where we can get the space we need. The children won't have to share a room growing up and will increase our living space almost by double. We have an appointment to go and speak with the new build company on the 17th. My partner has said that she doesn't know why we can't live here for a couple of more years. She has said that all of this has come on all of a sudden and isn't sure on moving. I have basically organised all of this within the last few days however my partner has known for a while now how keen I am on moving and want to move from a flat to a house. My main driver behind doing this ''all of a sudden'' is because I work in property sales and I know the timescales involved with buying and selling. I am also very conscious of the fact that our daughter will be starting school in less than a year and I don't want to stay here for a couple of more years and then have to pull her out of school when she has made her friends to then be the new girl in a different school and she will need start all over again making friends, I know this can be difficult as children can be really nasty sometimes, especially to the new person... Kids will be kids... From the discussions, I have had with the mortgage lender we are not going to be that much out of pocket and everything should work out fine. Another factor of where we currently live is our flat is round the corner from her sister. We bought this flat on that basis and also because my partner wanted our daughter to go to the nursery with her cousins. Her cousins have now left nursery and gone to school. She has a younger cousin at nursery with her now but I don't think she would find it as too much of an issue as it is her younger cousin and she doesn't have the same connection with her younger cousin as she did her older one. My partner has openly admitted part of the reason she does not want to move just now is that she likes living near her sister and the other reason is basically ''just cos...'' The new house we are moving to would be roughly 20 minutes away in the car. I really don't see the problem, I'm not asking her to move halfway around the world. I also don't think it would be nice to let my child start school with the knowledge we are going to have to move at some point and need to move area due to affordability. We would not be able to afford a 3-bed house in this area and also the new build company offers a scheme which is going to allow us the size of house we need and without the scheme, we would probably be £100k+ away from what we need to move to a similar property. I just want us all to have a house, I don't want to disturb my childs education. I don't want her to make friends then lose them and have to make new friends again as the new girl. The house I have been looking at is also only 2 minutes away from my partners work. The move would actually add on more than an hour extra a day to MY travel time every day. Everything I am doing is for my family and what I feel is the greater good. I asked my partner, don't you want your own home, for us and the children and the answer was - ''I dunno..'' I'm so frustrated and confused. We have been together for 10 years and I feel like when it comes to where we live we have to be attached to her sisters hip. I get on with her sister there is no problems what so ever. I just want us to have a home that is our own and to give us the space that we all need. Am I being unreasonable? Am I missing something?
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Buying a bigger house, partner not keen
2 replies
NickSco · 15/10/2020 22:45
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