I don't know what to do

[eshvem]

My 8 year old son has two friends who are brothers...8 and 10.

Long story short, they live near us and come round every weekend without fail which I have no problem with... their dad is agrophobic amongst other issues and never leaves the house, their mother is extremely stressed all the time because the eldest has severe anger issues, something we do not experience when he is with us.

They are both amazing kids and are always an absolute joy to be around. But as soon as they go home the eldest kicks off totally trashing their house and hitting the mother etc etc. This affects the younger one who today broke down in tears when he had to go home early.

I have offered to help by having them stay or just providing somewhere she can send the eldest to calm down but I don't want to step on anyone's toes. There are obviously deep seated issues here that I have no handle on nor can control. I know they have tried to get the eldest help and he has been assessed for adhd which has been diagnosed the school are also giving extra help in class. I just don't know what else I can do... it's heart breaking to see such lovely lads in such a state of turmoil.

Any suggestions?

[willloman]

Yes, be helpful. Offer, they may say no. That's fine.

[stayingontherail]

I think you are already doing your bit. If you try to do more you run the risk of interfering. You can’t fix the situation but it sounds like you’re making it a little easier. Keep doing what you’re doing.