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Dying of guilt, need advise!

(2 Posts)
Joshgroban Fri 21-Oct-16 17:08:35

I've been married for four years now and have a 17mo girl. So, my ex boyfriend had been trying to send me requests on social media sites and I've been declining them and had blocked him from my account for years. But the other day he I don't know why but I accepted his fb chat request!! Why on earth would I do it? I don't know, I guess I was just curious. We chatted for quite a while and somehow my husband read our chat while he was at work. He text me and i didn't reply quick enough and as he was obviously viewing my chat simultaneously he was furious. I did not have any wrong intentions while chatting to my ex, it was just a friendly chat and we asked about each other's lives. But my conscious kept telling me I shouldn't be doing this and I kept ignoring. Then my ex suggested if we talk, as in fb voice call and I agreed! Why did I do that? I thought it wasn't right but I agreed? Then received a text from my husband sounding mad out of the blue. And I just realised what a huge mistake I was making. To cut a long story short, I didn't speak to my ex & ended the chat there & deleted it.
My husband came home angry because of me & hasn't spoken to me since then. I can't eat or concentrate on anything! I apologised to him several times last night but he said he doesn't trust me anymore! I'm devastated and haven't stopped crying since then. He still won't talk to me or eat anything I cook.
PLEASE ADVISE ME WHAT TO DO? I'm dying of guilt :'(

KateBG Fri 11-Nov-16 09:40:09

First - you have not done nothing so terrible. If it was only talking about your lifes then it is so bad that he woulld punish you so harshly.
Second - if your husband is at work and he is not working but he is starring at your facebook, this is a huge sign that he is too controlling. Be really careful for more signs. If she is reading your facebook, then he is checking yor phone, and email, and skype, etc. This mean that he spends a lot of time searching for problems. He is searching for them.
It is good that you have shown that you feel bad about it, but he lets you cry for days then he is cruel to you.
The first signs of abusive relationships are controlling communication, controlling finances, isolating you from your family and friends. Be careful. I wish you luck!

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