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what would you do?

(5 Posts)
daniellewilson1987 Thu 25-Oct-12 17:49:34

this is i think the first time i have posted in here but basically, my eldest childs father is in prison for a serious crime he wont get out in another 2 years, before he was sent to prison he only had contact that was supervised through his mum (i normally get on quite well with her and have had a close relationship in the past) because of domestic violence against me, but now im unsure if i want him to have any contact with my child again when he is released, normally every bone in my body screams to keep her away from him but having grown up without ever meeting my father in my mind he became some kind of hero character
constructive advice please
what would other people do??

Nigglenaggle Fri 26-Oct-12 16:08:45

I don't think anyone can properly advise you without knowing the people involved, but I am tempted to say don't let him within a million miles. He has hit you because he has insufficient control over himself. He doesn't sound like the sort of person who you would want your child anywhere near. Is the child old enough to have an opinion?

daniellewilson1987 Fri 26-Oct-12 18:02:50

shes 5 so she will be 7 when hes out and has a decent enough relationship with him, shes unaware of what hes in prison for and unaware of the domestic violence

squeeze321 Fri 26-Jul-13 21:38:22

Violent induviduals can also attack their children because they become blind with rage and younge children often become victims too, just like I was. If I was in your position, I would only allow my child to have contact with the induvidual in a supervised contact centre, where I knew they were safe and when the child becomes of age it would be up to them what contact they had with him.

Thurlow Fri 26-Jul-13 21:42:43

I would say contact centre, but obviously very closely monitored to make sure he isn't displaying any behaviour which is concerning. It is a horrible situation you are in, but in the long run, as long as the contact is safe and monitored, I would say that your DD deserves the chance to know her dad until she is old enough to make decisions herself.

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