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Got a really unpleasant task this afternoon..

(31 Posts)
akhems Fri 06-Nov-09 11:19:49

I have to give someone notice as they have not fulfilled their role satisfactorily during their probationary period.

I've got all the procedures etc sorted but it's just how to handle the 'talk' that's worrying me. I've never had to do this before and I really like the person but they really are incompetent and unsuited to the post, despite extensive training and help etc.

Any advice gratefully received.

morningpaper Fri 06-Nov-09 11:21:12

Normally ime people have handled this better than I've expected them to

If you are sympathetic then you should be fine

Offer as much help as you can e.g. putting together a new CV, promise to give reference etc. and talk about their strengths, even if you exagerate a bit

akhems Fri 06-Nov-09 11:23:12

Thanks MP... I hope you're right.. he is inclined to be a tad dramatic at times :/

LoveBeingAMummy Fri 06-Nov-09 11:26:01

It is hard but in the long run it is better to be honest wiht them. Be professional and prepared for how they might react (ie tissues in your bag) Make sure that you both a have a drink.

You don't say if they know whats coming, I hope so as it will make it easier. I've done these with people and they have left with a smile on their face wink

LoveBeingAMummy Fri 06-Nov-09 11:28:10

Just seen you last post, just make sure you have the response to all areas he may question. But at the end of the day that is the decision you have come too and if he feels he needs to he can appeal.

Might be worth asking a collegue to come and knock on the door with an imprtant phone call if you think he may go on and you won't be able to get out of there smile

akhems Fri 06-Nov-09 11:29:08

Thank you LBaM

I don't think he knows but does suspect as his probationary period is coming to an end and some of the mistakes he's made have been really disastrous.. and he keeps making remarks about being got rid of.

I just want to do it kindly but the trouble is that I can get flustered in situations such as these and that's what I really want to avoid.

LoveBeingAMummy Fri 06-Nov-09 11:33:52

So think about the sort of things you think he may say and how you would answer it.

Make sure you have all paperwork with you eg if he states that he has improved in a certain area can you show him that this has not got to the required level?

basically try and ahve an answer.

The more someones knows about what could happen before the meeting the better it goes in my experience. Making someone feel 'better' by down playing the sitation prior to the meeting just makes it worse.

He sounds like he knows that he's not up to it and is probably just crossing his fingers that you won't get rid of him.

He does know his probabtionary meeting is today?

Good luck.

LeninGuido Fri 06-Nov-09 11:35:48

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

akhems Fri 06-Nov-09 11:39:45

yes, he knows we're having a meeting this afternoon.

That's what I'm doing now, going over everything to make sure he won't be able to bamboozle me.

I'm just wary of histrionics and in fact he's just knocked at my house (I'm working from home) which is very close to the office to ask what he's done and why the meeting this afternoon.. arrggghh!

LoveBeingAMummy Fri 06-Nov-09 11:41:48

That is far from appropriate.

Katisha Fri 06-Nov-09 11:44:06

Knocked at your house??

No no no.

Katisha Fri 06-Nov-09 11:44:37

What did you say to him when he knocked??

LeninGuido Fri 06-Nov-09 11:45:12

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

nickelbang Fri 06-Nov-09 11:47:40

akhems, your last post has worried me a bit.
i'm sure it's nothing, because, as although you're working from home, it is your home and that's not the done thing.

It might be worth getting someone else in on this. just in case.

and make sure you tell someone he came to your house about it too.
mainly to cover your own back.

MrsDenning Fri 06-Nov-09 11:48:21

Can you give him the option to resign, so that he does not have a dismissal on his record?

Ripeberry Fri 06-Nov-09 11:49:29

How on earth does he know where you live?

LoveBeingAMummy Fri 06-Nov-09 11:50:51

If people have asked me before Ive stated facts, there are two outcomes of a probabtionary meeting, you pass probation or you fail it. Given your performance you should know which it will be. If you are unsure about your performance we can discuss it again.

LoveBeingAMummy Fri 06-Nov-09 11:53:01

The more i think about it, you need to get the fact he came to yours into th emeeting and the notes. ie any discussions he wishes to have must be at the work place.

Katisha Fri 06-Nov-09 11:57:00

DO you have a manager you can tell about the coming to the house bit?

akhems Fri 06-Nov-09 12:39:59

I've got the list of facts ready.

Thing is we're a very small organisation, he's supposed to be the manager while the rest of us apart from one other employee are volunteers.

He knows where I live because we're a self-run housing management project.. it's hard to explain without giving too much away ifswim.

I will have two other members with me in the meeting but I'm the one to deal the blow.

Since he knocked he's now rang me three times but because I was on another call I wasn't able to answer him.

Aaargh I'm really dreading his reaction this afternoon

mabh Fri 06-Nov-09 13:32:35

akhems he knows. The only explanation for him frantically trying to get hold of you. Can you call the meeting forward?

Time to be noble, I'm afraid. You're probably going to get the, 'surely not before Christmas' and 'not in this climate' responses and there's no answer to that. You'll feel crap afterwards but you have to be very very clear.

If you make a point of describing his good points and offer to give a respectable reference, it will help.

... and thank goodnes you will have someone in with you. Aaagh.

Good luck

akhems Fri 06-Nov-09 13:37:57

thank you mabh... I have no doubts that it is the right decision, all the things you mentioned are in place it's just the drama of it.. wish I could have a drinkie first, lol

I can't bring it forward because the two people who will be sitting in can't get here sooner :/

JustAnotherManicMummy Fri 06-Nov-09 13:49:55

His poor performance is not your fault. This sort of thing should never come as a surprise to the individual. As long as you've had regular performance reviews then you should be ok.

It is always worst the first time because you don't know what to expect (first time I had to dismiss someone was for gross misconduct where it was very black and white... and I still felt rubbish).

I always start the meeting by asking the other person how they think their performance has been. They usually tell you what you already know and like some other posters have said you can use the meeting to help someone move on from what must surely be a mutally unsatisfactory situation.

BTW how much notice of this meeting did he get because his behaviour is bizarre?

neume Fri 06-Nov-09 14:08:06

Hi there.

I've been in this situation, and it's not nice, so good luck.

As a decision has been made to let him go, I would avoid getting into a discussion about his performance - presumably he has previously had feedback when he hasn't been up to scratch.

If you start to discuss specifics of performance in this meeting, you may find yourself debating exactly what standard of work is good enough or not.

I would also avoid using terms like "incompetence" etc, but say the role is not suited to his skills set.

Try to be fairly neutral...don't express too much sympathy or he may think he can talk you out of it, but do wish him luck for the future and express regret about the timing if he brings it up.

If you're worried about being flustered, prepare a script and stick to it...this is an official meeting not an informal chat, and it will help you keep on track.

Hope it goes OK....

LoveBeingAMummy Fri 06-Nov-09 16:11:51

Hope it went better than expected smile

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