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flowery please help me! and anyone else

(15 Posts)

Ok about 2 weeks ago i posted about a meeting i was having with my area manager due to a problem i was having with my direct manager shouting at me etc, I posted the final outcome on here and was happy with it at that time.

Things have been bearable since then, even though he verbally assured me he would give me a maternity leave date within 48 hours of our meeting - 2 weeks or so later and still nothing.

I've gone to work kept my head down got excellant compliments in writing about my shifts etc.

Went in on Wednesday to meet the nvq man and saw a complaint about a shift id worked on last Sunday. The superviser on shift had written a response to this complaint explaining she had dealt with the customer etc so i assumed everything was OK.

Went through the e-mails at work today to see if the manager had done a final complaint response and am really upset at what i found!

E-mail from the area manager saying the complaint was from the sunday morning and the member of staff needed a GOOD KICKING!!! with the !!! in the e-mail. The reply from my manager was in these exact words Bloody iateallthecreameggs (but my name of course) and they had more than enough staff on. What the hell do I do with her?
Then another e-mail from my manager saying 'Whats the sentence for murder! All I ask is that staff do their best. 14 of us do 1 doesn't!

This e-mail was sent the Tuesday morning before the manager had even discussed the complaint with staff on that shift and even till now she has not discussed or asked me about it. She just assumed that as i was working it must have been all down to me!

I am gutted. I dont want to be there any more this is it, but im stuck there as i need the maternity pay! A member of staff asked me directly if i felt victimised I said yes and she said she thinks I am to. She is willing to support me if i decide to take this any further.

What the hell do I do now? What can I do? Please help me as i am in tears about it. I printed the e-mails of and copied the complaint and written reply from the other superviser, but could not find any e-mail to area manager exlaining the true explantion of the complaint.

I can not face another shift working there its causing me to much stress but i dont get sick pay, as has been pointed out to me im on a zero hours contract.

Jemli Fri 07-Aug-09 21:23:10

I am sorry to hear about your problems. Have you tried contacting the citizen's advice bureau. Also you may be entitled to statutory sick pay from the government, but I am no expert in this field

If you do go back to work, do keep a diary of all events that happen.

Also do not rely on the kind offer made by your colleague, as if it comes to the crunch, she may have to put her job first.

How many weeks pregnant are you? You certainly have rights there and I think they have to keep your job open for a year after the birth.

It sounds like they are trying to pressure you into quitting so that they do not have this obligation.

Just keep sticking at it if you can, but do not do anything that you think might harm your little one to be.

There are lots of employment laws to protect you. I was sent a load of info last year, but filed it as all our employees are men. I will try and did it out.

Don't give up if you can at all help. Can I ask what sort of job/company you work at? Will help if i can, but not a expert. Do try to get professional advise

Thanks Jemli. I have only just got home from work and this has all happened this evening.

Stat sick pay would not cover my wages and so we would financially struggle, its hard enough needing all the cash at the moment to buy bab y bits.

I am almost 16 weeks pregnant and i think your right they dont want to keep my job open, another girl is already on maternity leave at the moment, I wont rely on the kind offer y my coleague as i know she probably wont stick to it, she needs to money for travelling.

I work in a restaurant and do shift work, if I had it my way I would not go in at all, im trying to look into contstructive dismissal at the moment but am fazed by it all to be honest, and our CAB is open very random hours through the week, my next shift is Sunday. sad

Jemli Fri 07-Aug-09 21:45:41

I notice from your profile that you are a restaurant supervisor. If you have an area manager, presumable it is a chain of restaurants. If so, there should be some sort of employee handbook that details your rights etc and any grievance procedure. In most regular jobs, there is a standard procedure if your supervisor has an issue with your work -> verbal warning 1st written warning, 2nd written warning etc. If you had genuinely done something wrong then your manager would have started down this route. At which stage you have various rights to reply.

I know it is very difficult in this situation, but it may be necessary to arrange another meeting with your manager. If there is an HR person, perhap ask them to sit in. Try and be proactive and ask how your manager thinks you can improve performance. If necessary agree a set of targets which you can then adhere to.

Try not to get upset about this. There are solutions to this problem.

thanks jemli, yes am a superviser and it is a chain of restaurants.

I was told the meeting with the area man ager was definately not a formal meeting of any kind and assured by the area manager my job was not on the line, he has heard nothing but good about me and my work. Manager has not gone down the disciplinary route even verbal this is all behind my back, as i said she still has not discussed it with me and i have been told not to conta ct her on her days of, tommorrow is my day of and i will have to call her for a different issue.
The area manager was supposed to be coming back to meet us in 2 weeks from our last meeting which is around now i think but i have not been told when he is coming.
I asked in our meeting how i could improve the way i work and she told me infront of regional manager my work was perfect there was no problem and now this.........

Jemli Fri 07-Aug-09 21:53:55


I have been through a constructive dimissal case. To be honest it is very harrowing. I did win, but I knew when i started the process that even if i did win it would prohibit getting another job as in my line of work it marks you as a trouble maker. Unfair but a harsh reality.

It is obviously too early to start maternity leave and too late to look for a different job. Try to keep calm as it does look like certain individuals are trying to make things difficult for you. Do keep trying to get advise from the CAB and do document everthing. If it is a national chain you work for, such as McDonalds etc they certainly would not like the publicity associated with what appears to be happening. I will try and ask around the people I know who have legal expertise to see if I can find out anything more, but this probably won't be until office hours next week. Gald to hear that you have a partner to support you in this.

Always happy to chat/help if things get to much. Tend to be here in evenings when little boy is asleep. Chin up.. things will work out ok.

thanks jemli, I was fine till i found these e-mails and just upset that she accused me, without even asking what had happened.

I shall keep the evidence i have somewhere safe, and yes its a very big chain and very well known and the e-mail from the regional manager saying the member of staff need a good kicking, with the company name on it does not look good for them.

Apppreciate your support you've given me, perhaps after my day of tommorrow i can move forward. I'm leaving work at 26 weeks pregnant (taking owed holiday) then mat leave and i know its very early but im not planning on going back to this company again after all this but of course i cant tell them that!

loggin out now for the evening to watch something about Mary to make me laugh! thankyou!

Jemli Fri 07-Aug-09 22:04:44

Gosh.. thats all very positive. Perhaps you could minute the meeting that you had, if it is not too late including these comments about your excellent work and then ask her if she agrees it is a fair represention to sign them or certainly try and get her to commit in writing that she is happy with your work. Do try to minute all future meetings.

I was going to ask if your manager was a woman, ther could be some jealousy involved there perhaps?

Can I ask.. are you entitled to look at the emails. It seems strange that this sort of conversation would be on an open system for everyone to read. Does anyone know you have these emails. If not it may be worth keeping that quiet for the time being.

Hi Jemli, no one knows i have the e-mails and the e-mail is open for supervisers incase there are any updates etc that could be important on a shift. I have never been told by this manager we could not access them and we have to use the computer every shift. The assistant manager knows i have seen them he has assured me he will not let her know, although im not certain of this.......

She had refused me to start my mat leave when i wanted using the excuse that she left 13 weeks before her child was born and she got bored and resented her baby, but regional manager said i could definately go!

I think i might request a meeting between the two of us to discuss how she feels things are going before we meet the regional manager and i shall ask if she can minute this, she will likely say no as nothing is minuted, in that case i will. She is fine to my face so i dont know where this has come from! Im making all the bloody effort and all im getting is a kick in the teeth, ive been fighting of calling her this morning to have a chat about whether the complaint has been resolved, but i know she will turn it into an argument which i dont want, but she wont do shifts with me so we can never actually talk........

flowerybeanbag Sat 08-Aug-09 15:36:54

You are doing everything right creameggs, I think requesting an update meeting the two of you to discuss how things are going prior to your meeting with the regional manager is an excellent idea. If she is fine to your face and confirms that she is more than happy with your performance, then it's clearly some weird problem with her, possibly jealousy as Jemli suggests, or something else.

It doesn't make it ok, obviously, but your regional manager's positive feedback and everything else you've got should be reassuring to you that it's a very isolated problem with this particular individual, and therefore there is no wider threat to your job or anything like that.

Constructive dismissal is a very stressful and drawn-out process, and very difficult to prove as well, it often being subjective and one person's word against another. If it's individual behaviour from one person that's the main problem, it would make it even difficult. A tribunal would also expect you to exhaust internal procedures to resolve the problem first, such as raising a grievance.

Tbh in your position, leaving in 10 weeks for good, I'd be inclined not to take that route. You are doing everything right, keep doing it. You could raise a grievance if you feel the need to do so, apart from anything else to officially draw this woman's behaviour to the attention of the wider company, or if things get on to more of an even keel over the next few weeks, you could decide to ride it out until your mat leave.

excellant thankyou flowery and jemi. I will go into work today and pretend nothing has happened, keep my head down and just get through my shifts. As my sis pointed out its only 9 week till i have a weeks holiday then back for a week then i leave thankfully!!

Its hard to forget whats been said about me but not much i can do and i will call her when she is next in to arrange a meeting.

Jemli Mon 10-Aug-09 16:44:02

Hope all went wellwith you shift. If your manager is refusing to work at the same time with you then I think the issue is with her.If you were doing something wrong I think she would be taking a different course of action. Stick at it smile

thanks jemli, i rang her yesterday to see how she feels things are going, she said she felt all was really good, she had no issues with me and how did i feel. Obviously i didnt tell her what i had found, i just said yes very happy with how things are going. Will keep plodding along thankyou so much!

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