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nanny wanting 2 work with my own child

(25 Posts)
num1mum Sat 25-Jul-09 20:01:01

ok so it makes sense me taking my own child to work.why pay a childcarer,when i am a childcarer.I have been qualified for 12 years and have loasda varied experience and glowing referencea.I am so capable of looking after all different age groups of children.I also treat all children i have cared for equally.Just because i have my own i will not panda to just my childs needs.He will grow up knowing what i do and that he will have me all to himself when we get home.I have been for a few interviews,but agencies are finding it difficult to even approach their clients about having a nanny that has her own child.I understand why some families may not want me to take my child to work,but there are benefits too!!!
Employers children will learn about taking caring for others,socialising with others,taking turns,i will treat all children as individuals,care for all of their needs,spend quality time with all children etc.Im a proffessional so with every job i give it my all.Before having my lovely son,i used to find great positions within 2 weeks!Its soo frustrating to go for interviews now coz i spend the whole time explaining im capable!Id love to stay with my current family of 2 1/2yrs,but they have 2yr old 6yr old and had a baby 1mnth before me!Just think 4 children with those age groups is too much.My current boss would love me to stay,but understands my reasons for leaving.She thinks someone will snap me up,but ts not that easy..they dont know me and sometimes i dont even get a chance to go for interview.

missblythe Sat 25-Jul-09 20:10:10

A friend of mine has exactly this set up with her nanny, who has her own child a similar age to friend's DD. She's very happy with how it works out for them-hope you find a new position soon!

nooka Sat 25-Jul-09 20:27:08

We had a nanny with her own child, and it (mostly) worked out OK, but we did only choose that option because it was considerably cheaper (similar to a nannyshare). Our nanny's little boy was a year or two older than our ds, and it was OK until her ds started nursery (pre-school), when life had to revolve around taking him to his nursery and back every day. Then when we had dd too we all agreed that it just didn't work (and our nanny decided to go part time).

Generally the nanny world is very market force driven IME. If there are lots of nannies out there looking for work families have more choice, wages go down, and compromises are less likely to be made.

LynetteScavo Sat 25-Jul-09 20:33:10

How old is your son?

Have you considered childminding?

num1mum Sat 25-Jul-09 20:41:01

Thank-you.You are right there are heaps of nannies out there n less jobs,coz so many people being made redundant etc.I havent taken going part-time out of the equasion eventhough my wages will go down alot(was working 55hr week)Its the quality lovely families that are willing to let me show them how i work are hard to find.Im sure families find it hard to find lovely nannies too!I know it CAN work.wish me luck.Need to find job by Xmas school hols.

num1mum Sat 25-Jul-09 20:44:27

I am so used to coming home to a child free zone.I know i have my 5mth old now,but dnt want whole house to b taken over just yet.I love the freedom of being a nanny.Get more time with the children n dnt have the paperwork childminders get...yet!

num1mum Sat 25-Jul-09 20:49:11

I would love to have been a teacher,like my mum.Kinda got put off with all the paperwork she used to bring home.reports,marking planning etc.I have such good relationship with boss,we chat daily by phone reg.how children are doing.Sometimes i even send picture messages of what we are up too.

1dilemma Sat 25-Jul-09 21:00:12

good luck with your search

although I will say looking at it from the other side I don't see any advantage in this for the employers

a good nanny would offer a child lots of opportunities to socialise surely? if you nanny share with another set of parents you split the cost pro-rata whereas it seems to me if a nanny brings their own child they expect to reduce their salary by proportionally a lot less, when you or your employer has a second child you run the risk of the arrangement falling apart (average age gap seems to be about 2 years round here) and that's beside the obvious one about one of the chldren being yours etc etc.

num1mum Sun 26-Jul-09 12:22:01

Before i had my son i had a job mon-wed and a job thurs fri(nanny sharing)Most Nannies charge per day or hour.I charged per day and infact my two sets of employers didnt even converse or meet with each other.My colleauges and i have always found its best to keep it that way.Nannytax dealt with all the pay n tax issues on our behalf.Everyone was happy.Why should i lower my asking rate because i have my own child,if my experience and expertise and proffessionalism are the same?if i did this I could charge my employers per child!That would b extra complicated and put employers off even more.The family i currently work for would hate to see me go.Its just the age groups and ammount of children are too much for me to give them all that they would need.Theres no reason my new position shouldnt work if both parties communicate well and trust each other.Im staying positive and keeping my fingers crossed i can find another great position.

1dilemma Mon 27-Jul-09 14:00:03

I think you misunderstand me, I didn't mean you should lower your rate because you have a child but if you nanny (say 50 50 for ease of my maths) you split the rate wiht the other parents 50 50

from what I have seen round here (and on mumsnet shock) if you have a nanny with their own child they expect anything up to 80% of the going rate which IMHO doesn't seem to divvy up the costs in a proportional fashion

I believe your current arrangement is technically a nanny with 2 jobs rather than a nanny share (someone else was corrected on another thread) to ba a share it has to be what you are proposing ie children from different families on the same day

anyway my point was that I simply don't see the benefit in this for the employer sorry.

I still wish you well with your job search and there are loads of people out there who don't think like me so I'm sure you'll be fine smile

flowerybeanbag Mon 27-Jul-09 14:12:28

I employ a nanny myself. She doesn't charge me an hourly or daily rate, when I was recruiting I decided what salary I was prepared to offer for how much experience I wanted, and that's what she is paid.

I would not have been prepared to pay the same salary to a nanny bringing her own child with her to work, and I think most employers would be the same. It's just not comparing like with like. If you have two candidates for a job, both with exactly the same experience and glowing references, and both wanting the same salary, then it stands to reason you will choose the one who can give your own child/children 100% attention.

I think most employers who are prepared to consider a nanny bringing their own child would expect to pay a bit less to recognise the fact that the nanny is not able to give 100% attention to their child, and also to recognise the fact that there are various logistical and other issues involved in bringing other children.

So as 1dilemma and nooka say, often the major benefit for nanny employers in hiring someone with their own child is that it will be a bit cheaper than a nanny without their own child.

If you want the same salary as you would be on if you weren't bringing your own child, you will probably find it more difficult to get a job. As 1dilemma says, most nannies will take their charges out to socialise anyway - I know my DS goes out to three different groups each week as well as sometimes meeting up with other nannies/childminders and their charges, so that's not an issue for me.

I hope you find something soon anyway, best of luck.

artichokes Mon 27-Jul-09 14:19:54

I have recently been interviewing for a nanny and the agency recommended one lad who had her own baby and was offering to work for 70% of the rate the other nannies were charging.

I was tempted but there were disadvatages. Firstly, we would have needed a double buggy and two highchairs etc. Second, she could never have gone out in the car the children as I have two kids and no room for another carseat. Third, I figured she was more liekly to need to take time off than a nanny with no children and I can't afford to pay sick leave and a temp nanny. Fourth, and I am blush to say it, I was worried she would get pregnant again soon and I would have the headache of her maternity pay and cover. In the end we decided to go for the equally nice, but childfree option.

artichokes Mon 27-Jul-09 14:20:13

lady not lad!

AtheneNoctua Mon 27-Jul-09 14:42:58

Having ananny who brings her own child comes with awhole host of complications:

What happens when your child is sick? Will you bring him to work anyway or need the day off?

What happens when my kids are sick? Will you bring your child and expose him?

Will your child go to the same school and have the same holidays?

I buy my nanny a gym membership. Will I have to buy one for your son too?

What if your son does not like the same things my kids like? For example, if mine take tennins, and yours hates it will my kids have to quit or will you force yours to go against his will?

Then there is parenting choices that may differ. I might be a gina ford girl and you believe in baby led everything. How is that going to be compatible?

Like others have said, I might consider a share, but only if it came with a big financial incentive for me (like a 30-40% pay cut).

Fruityjuice Mon 27-Jul-09 14:55:20

Try Childminding, seriously, this is what I did after I had my son (I now also have a 4 month old DS2 smile)
I love being at home and being my own boss is sooo much better and easier.
Yes there is a huge amount of paper work but once you have a system sorted it's really not that hard smile

1dilemma Tue 28-Jul-09 08:37:12

Good comments Athene although I have to ask why not a 50% pay cut? if you were sharing you would pro rata why would you pay more so someone else can have the pleasure of looking after their own child? (plus for me what was the concern that their child would inevitable get a higher priority)

I could never get over these issues when I (briefly) looked at this

that's aside from other real issues like one of you having another child

AtheneNoctua Tue 28-Jul-09 10:16:03

Because working for two employers and two houses is a bit of an extra pain for the nanny. So I think it is fair that she expect to earn a bit more than if it was just one full-time nanny position with one family's children. I think it fair for her to make an extra 10-20% So if each family pays 55-60% of the usual salary that should be achieved and everyone gets something out of the deal.

I think a lot of people would take a 40% pay cut in exchange for no childcare bill.

So, now that I think a bit more about it. I would entertain a share if it meant I paid 55% - 60% of a non-share salary. (40-45% reduction)

The one thing that I think is different about a nanny with own child is that we don't have a three way negotiation for holidays. So, maybe that is plus that does not exist in other shares.

OnceWasSquiffy Tue 28-Jul-09 12:04:12

The only way you will get a job in these markets is to have something different to offer than the other nannies looking for work. In your case, the thing that is different about you actually counts against you in the eyes of employers (regardless of your own views).

If you told the agencies that you will accept roles at 30% less than nannies without children, then you are at least turning it into a potential advantage in the eyes of employers. If you don't you simply will not (as you have discovered) get anywhere.

The alternative of course would be to take 100% salary and send your own child off to a childminder, but that will - as you know - cost you much more than a haircut of say 30%. And to be honest, even at a 30% cut, you will probably have more 'net of childcare costs' income than the majority of the mothers who employ you. Right or wrong, it galls workign mothers to see so much of their money taken up in childcare costs that to see a nanny expecting to get her child looked after 'for free' just doesn't go down well.

1dilemma Tue 28-Jul-09 13:04:56

ah I see Athene and sorry my post was so hard to read!

Annner Wed 29-Jul-09 20:59:22

My nanny has her own child and we expect to pay her a little less on the understanding that we factor in her school run and interests. After all, why should I pay for her to go to her child's assemblies, judo class, etc?

You are being rather unrealistic in your view that it will not affect your job. It will, and any potential employer will see that.

OnceWasSquiffy is spot-on, and you should accept that even a 10-20% drop in salary is nothing compared to the cost of full time childcare. You should see it as your child care cost. I can't take my children to work, after all - even though I work with children (as teacher!)

HappyMummyOfOne Fri 31-Jul-09 08:21:23

Most people who want a nanny do so because it suits them, fits in with their household and children get one to one attention. That wont happen if the nanny has her own child.

What will happen if your child wants to do a particular activity and the others dont? What if the schools vary and pick up times conflict? Who pays for the food for your child whilst at work?

I think you are being a little unreaslistic to expect to be paid the same rate as before now that you are planning to take your own child to work with you. Your employers children would have had your undivided attention before and now that wont happen as you'll also be seeing to your own child. Its only fair that a deduction is made for what is really a "nanny share" - its just that the other child is your own.

Like others have said, you need to look at the reduction as your own childcare costs.

For me personally, i'd never choose childcare where the person providing it had their own children with them - its mothers instinct to favour your own and I would always worry about that.

violethill Sat 01-Aug-09 22:06:26

Agree with HappyMummy.

You are asking to take your child along to work with you, thereby avoiding paying a significant chunk of your income on childcare yourself, so it makes total sense to offer your services at a reduced rate from previously. You are not actually offering the same service as before. Previously you were nannying for other people's children; now, you will be caring for your own child while nannying. Not saying that's better or worse - just that it's a different scenario and needs to be relfected in your income.
Some people may be quite happy with you bringing your own child, but others won't be.

GeorgieGirl76 Mon 08-Apr-13 20:37:01

There are good nannies and bad nannies, I've worked amongst both types, some with their own children and many without. Choosing a new nanny is always scary and of course you go for what looks best on paper first and that is one without a kid in tow, undoubtably.
There are indeed situations however where allowing a previous nanny and her child to return on full wages is advantageous to the employer and her family. Where the nanny was adored and trusted, proved more than capable, caring, creative and reliable. Where she has talents she has used to your children's advantage such as teaching them to swim, draw and cook etc. Your charges get their old familiar child carer back and should be calmer and happier as a result, you save on peace of mind and the aforementioned after school clubs. In other words, things go back to normal with only the addition of a baby which would have the same impact on your child's day as if they had a younger sibling.
The above argument about taking both children to tennis and one not liking it...or the nanny taking her kids to judo and getting paid while doing so are nonsense; the charges days are set and take priority and the nanny's child fits in.
The argument that a nanny is saving money on childcare is true but that's not your business to be honest. She is still as good at her job! Having an extra child does not make a mother worse at mothering so why should it make a professional worse at her job of nannying?

Providing your nanny can fit all the necessary car seats in the car and she is a relaxed, reliable and capable person then there is no reason for anyone to suffer as a result of her child being present; she may even become better at her job out of gratitude or a heightened awareness of having a dependant to feed and clothe. I have nannied for many families over nearly 20 years and can safely say that the more charges I have, the better nanny I am simply because there is no time to deviate from the children's needs.

These arguments above do not take in to account the relationship that exists between the good nanny and her charges. It can be a wonderful thing and sometimes too precious to lose.

flowery Mon 08-Apr-13 21:33:19

Georgiegirl this thread is 4 years old!

Isabeller Tue 09-Apr-13 21:38:36

Wonder what happened grin

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