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i am sooooooo bloody angry with my boss!!!!!!!!

(7 Posts)
Moomin Tue 01-Mar-05 21:41:59

i'm nearly 6 wks pg and i teach p/t in a secondary school. i have told my Head and head of dept as well as a few close colleagues. mostly because i need some time off for antenatal stuff and also i want them to know why i might not be 100% at the moment. i also told the head as he's been very good to me so i thought i'd do him a favour by letting him know in advance so he can do a bit of forward planning for next year. however, i did tell him not to broadcast it, and also not to make too many plans, as it's very early days, obviously.

a friend of mine who is head of another dept rang me tonight as she's been at a big curriulum meeting, which involves all senior management and every head of dept in the school. she told me that the head actually announced my news to all at the meeting!!!!

i'm absolutely fuming - one reason being that it is so early and anything could still happen. also i've had to ring my other friends at school tonight and tell them my news so that they don't hear it second hand from anyone who was at the meeting and assumes it's common knowledge. I'm just not ready to go public on this and also it's MY news for me to tell, not him - and now i feel like it's all spoilt and i feel like i'm now on display. it's made me feel very anxious tonight.

i rang a good friend who is a senior manager but who wasn't at the meeting and she was mortified at his behaviour. she's advised me to have it out with him as soon as i can tomorrow, and to try and be calm but very firm with him and let him know how cross/upset i am. but i'm not sure if i can trust my hormones at the moment!! i'm so mad

cazzybabs Tue 01-Mar-05 21:43:54

Oh hugs! I know the feeling - I tell my head things or ask him professional questions and the next thing I know my line manager (who I don't like) is telling my the answers!!!!

FairyMum Tue 01-Mar-05 21:43:56

Poor you! Same thing happened to me when pregnant with DD. My boss sent an organisational chart to the whole bank with me down as"mat leave" when I was 8 weeks. Moral of the story? Don't tell unfortunately

Tommy Tue 01-Mar-05 22:02:45

OMG Moomin - that is outrageous
dare I say it, but it's probably because he's male and doesn't realise all the implications but it's also bloody unprofessional

runtus Thu 03-Mar-05 14:33:02

Did you say anything to him?? I'd have floored him...

Moomin Sun 06-Mar-05 10:06:19

quick update. i wne to see him the morning after and told him straight away that i was very cross and upset about what he'd said in the big meeting. honestly he was like a big kid, flapping and panicking and totally pushing the blame back onto me! he said that "loads" of people had mentioned it to him the next day so he thought it was out in the open. when i asked him who specifically had sadi somethingm turned out it was his sec and another dep head, both of which i had to tell because they arrange all, the cover and i've got to have a few days off for scans/appts soon. he then said "other" people had mentioned it to him too, but by coincidence couldn't remember who exactly. anyway, upshot was he said it wasn't his fault and i started crying and walked out saying 'i wish i hadn't told you at all'.
one thing is that everyone who has approached me since the meeting has been lovely and said they thought he was totally out of order. i saw him briefly the other day and he acted like nothing's happened so, yes, i guess he's just being a stupid insensitive bloke who hasn't a CLUE. what a tosser.

runtus Thu 10-Mar-05 09:37:41

Did he not apologise at all??? Even if he did genuinely think it was common knowledge, once he realised you were upset about it, he should have apologised immediately. To let you walk out crying is apalling, let alone to ignore the issue next time he sees you..........I guess all you can do is learn from the experience and remember who you can and can't trust in future.

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