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Should I get involved? 16yr old job(11 Posts)
(Copy and pasted from 'chat' as may be more relevant here)
My 16yr old sister lives with me, I am her legal guardian.
She has been looking for a summer job for some pocket money before starting college in September. Last Tuesday she had a successful interview at a pub/restaurant and they offered her to work 12-8 every Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday, starting the very next day. She accepted, but told them that she had an appointment today (Monday) so would likely have to miss the first half of that shift. The manager said that's fine, just write it down or she'd forget. She went in to work the next day (Wednesday last week) and confirmed to the manager on shift (a different manager) that she would indeed have to miss the first half of her shift for the appointment, and handed him a note containing the information. He said he'd give the note to the other manager as she wasn't available that day.
Fast forward to today, I took my sister to her appointment early this afternoon and then dropped her to work straight after. Just after I'd driven off, she called me. I pulled over and rang her back and she said she'd been told to go home. Apparently she was expected in at 12 and had told the (first) manager that she'd just 'pop out' for her appointment. Although she had initially said she'd 'likely' have to miss the first half of today's shift, I saw the note she wrote and it definitely said that after checking the appointment time she could only come in after the appointment.
She was obviously very upset and my first instinct was to turn around and go and find out what was going on. She asked me not to though as she was crying and felt embarrassed, but after some consoling in the car she was happy to let me call them once we got home.
Unfortunately neither of the managers were available when I called just now, so I said I'd call back later, but I just wondered if anyone else would call them in this case? She's only 16 and I think what happened showed a clear lack of communication between management resulting in my sister being told to 'go home', so I feel compelled to call them, but am I doing the right thing by 'involving myself'?
I know why you feel you have to be involved. But I wouldn't advise it. They screwed up, but she has precisely less than a week in the job. How long will the job last if you intervene. It's not fair, but so far she's lost a shift. She can lose more. A regrettably valuable lesson in work - life isn't fair. If she's going to say anything, it's her job to say it. When you work, you're a grown up.
If you make a fuss she might lose the job altogether. Next time she sees the manager who gave her permission to miss the shift she should explain. Seems like the note might have been a bit confusing as to what time she would turn up.
You see, I would and have 'interfered',
They are still so very young at that age, I don't care what the rest will say, our young people need to know someone's got their back.
They have very little experience of a/the work force, and we as adults need to be there to help. Obviously my opinion, I just don't get why some would say let them get on with it
I usually give advice and only step in once my dc have tried to deal with it themselves and it wasn't successful. I also offer the advice to take a consequence but not be a doormat.
Just to clarify a couple of points,
The note was definitely clear. It said "I have an appointment at 2:30pm on Monday and will be in straight afterwards, thank you, NAME". She also clarified it verbally with the second manager whilst handing him the hand written note.
I'd like to know why the second manager clearly didn't pass over the communication to the first manager?
And I'd like to know why if she was expected in at 12, then why did no one call her at 12/12:15/12:30 when she didn't show up then? Surely that's what most employers would do?
I'd also like to know why she was simply told "go home". No mention of whether or not she's sacked or if it was just meant as today or anything else.
The reason I think I'd like to know these things is because this is her very first job and she doesn't have the experience or confidence behind her to have asked them for herself. She doesn't even know if she's welcome back tomorrow or not
Don't get involved. This not school. She might be 'only' 16 but she is expected to have reached the maturity to deal with issues herself. Advise her, council her, but don't interfer with picking up conversation on her behalf.
Fir all you know, they've just pointed out they were surprised that she'd gone straight to the appointment (and to be fair, unless it was miles away, if the appointment was 2h 1/2 later, I understand why they would have expected her to go to work first), but have now all forgotten about it and moved on. Its no big deal.
You'll really do her a disservice by getting involved and I say that as a mum of three kids who all started some form of work at 16yo.
Tell her what to ask, but don't do it for her
How long is she expecting to be in this job if she is going to college in September? Surely 12-8 three days a week is not going to be feasible? So unless you think this could be a long-term position I'm not sure I would bother following up. Also I think you have an unrealistic view of the amount of time managers have to communicate about casual staff or follow up if they don't turn up - she had been in for one shift before not turning up on time for the next one. I know this is her first job and what has happened is upsetting but I truly wouldn't phone up on her behalf, fine to console and advise her how to handle it but please don't phone on her behalf!
Dont directly interfere!
I agree with everyone else. Step in only if needed. If an employee’s sister/guardian rang me up to remonstrate, I’d think the employee would likely bring too much hassle tbh. Plenty of teenagers are looking for shifts in kitchens, she’s easily replaced.