Help me decide about my career.

(3 Posts)
AshleyTr Thu 31-Oct-19 15:29:53

Hi guys,

This is not a relationship or dating question

I’m kindly ask you for advice because it’s been 6 months deciding which path should I take and as of today I’m still undecided. Giving me your advice would be a big help.

So I just recently graduated last May and I’m now working at a job which I don’t really like. The benefit really doesn’t outweigh the cost and I’m not having a work life balance because we are leaving the office at 12am and have to get back by 7am. What is worse is we are not being paid well. So I’m definitely leaving my job this month.

My mom just told me that it’s better to learn something new and not just to work 24/7. She told me that she will let me decide whether to take law and stay in my country or to pursue a master’s degree abroad and I should make my decision by December

I’m actually having a hard time which path I should take because every option has its pros and cons. I’m actually deciding whether to find a job opportunity abroad or to stay in my country and work here while studying law. The reason why I wanted to go abroad is because I feel more free when I’m with the people who are different. I would feel less judgement because some people really woudn’t understand why you’re doing something unlike when you are in your country where you have the same belief with others and you are more likely to be judged. It’s like siblings with the different gender are less likely to fight compared to the same gender. You understand? Also, it’s because working there could give me more cash inflow. Getting International currency because of my job could give me more cash if translated to my country which I could possibly give more to my parents and I will pursue a master’s degree there. The things that I didn’t like about this is that I would be separated from my family especially my parents. They mean so much to me especially my mom and going abroad will left me thinking and wondering how they are. They are already on their 60’s and I should do my best to be always there for them right? I dunno and I would not be able to do that If I would go abroad.

On the other hand, If I chose to stay here and pursue law while working. A good advantage for that is that I’m also going to become a lawyer which both of my parents are. It’s nice because I was primed by myself, my friends, relatives that in the future I’m going to be a lawyer. And staying here and working means that I will be there with my family to be there for them. Of course I know what it feels if you are already a parent and your son is not with you side right? specially if you’re a senior. But the disadvantage is that, I would not be able to help them financially because every employees here in our country is very very low and if you’re lucky you could make a good living for yourself only especially if you’re just a startup. Also, taking passing the bar exam is less likely to happen because of the small amount of passing rate around 17%. Getting a Master’s degree abroad is more doable.

My brother actually told me that the first one is the better option but my friends told me the the second option is better

What do you guys think? if you are in my shoes, which path should you take?

OP’s posts: |
EBearhug Fri 01-Nov-19 00:27:23

Is there anything about the current job you do like? It's low wages and long hours, but what about the tasks you do while there?

Do you want to be a lawyer, or is this just what everyone expects for you? If you do a masters, is that in a subject which you prefer?

Not knowing what to do long term is not at all unusual so soon out of university - it can take people years; others never really find out.

Your parents being in their 60s means little in itself - some 60 year olds are really fit and active. OTOH, neither of my parents made it past 62. They might still be working. They might not need you to be there for them right now - and modern technology means you can be in touch pretty much wherever you are if you need to be.

If you want to travel and live abroad, it will be easier to do now than when they are more infirm. Do you have siblings?

You need to think about what things are important to you in different areas of life. What subjects and activities get you fired up, so that time can pass without you noticing? If you had no restrictions in terms of money, time, qualifications, family ties and so on, what would you do?

If you can, spend some time travelling, experience new things, be independent.

In the end, it's your life, and only you can make the decision, but if you're being pressured from all sides, you can't see the options clearly any more, so that's why taking a break could help.

Good luck.

daisychain01 Fri 01-Nov-19 03:16:29

OP it would be a more effective solution if you can get some career advice in your country, for example through your university or a local educational or professional institution, as it's really difficult to give you any meaningful advice as to which career path to take when we have no idea what alternatives are available, nor what your talents and interest are.

With all due respect to your parents, I don't think they should dictate to you what they want you to do, but then again it could be a culture thing and you are having to live by their rules. But you must be in your mid 20s so about time to make your own independent choices.

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