How to resign? What to say?

[Poppyseed7]

I don't know what some of this post has gone in bold text.....sorry....bear with me.....

So, I've be offered a great new job; a lot more money and the team I'll be working for seem very nice (from what I can tell from the interview process!). The new company is well renowned (on par if not a bit better than my current company). So I need to now resign from my current job.

I need to give four months notice.

I've been at my current employer 5 years. My boss is a very nice man who I get on with really well with (we are professionally distant but we have the same sense of humour etc so have a laugh now and again - as much as you can in a corporate setting that is). However, over the past year certain things have really started to pis me off (sorry there are no nice ways of saying it).
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The truthful real reasons I have decided to look for another job are as follows;
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1. I am massively over worked. Most of my team are part time; and us full timers have to inevitably pick up the extra work. I'm exhausted when I get home as I literally don't stop all day. I regularly don't take my lunch break and it's a very pressured role due to the workload.

1. I'm not being treated the same as other people at my company in the same role. For example, I do not have my own secretary (my colleagues do) and am expected to do the work my secretary would do if I had one (on top of my normal role, for no extra renunciation). My boss' reasoning behind me not having a secretary is that the departmental budget won't stretch to one and, I presume, as I've managed so far without one (because I work so hard), I'm not getting one. Plus the new person doing the same role as me who stared a few months ago got a secretary when they joined the team....don't get me started!!!!

1. I'm paid under the market rate for my role - despite my anger in this post I'm actually very quiet and I'm sure this is the reason I'm being taken advantage of.

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4. I've recently found out that I'm being paid less than one of my team members who, quite frankly, is useless at his job. He has a different qualification to me and, I know that, if questioned about it, my boss would cite this as the reason for the pay gap....but it's boll*cks (sorry again) because I'm so much more experienced than this person, i bring in more money than they do (by a long shot) and, I have more responsibility and workload in my role than they do....far more!

So I've had enough.

Despite me really liking my boss he has what I'd call a "board approved answer for everything" so, even if i did grow a pair and tell him the truth about what's bothering me I know there would be a spiel about why it is the way it is. In short, nothing will change and, even if he offered me a pay rise there is no way my current company could/would match what I've been offered in this new role.

So we are where we are and I've been offered a new job, with a secretary lol. Yay!

I don't want to burn my bridges as I know that's never the right thing to do so in my formal resignation letter I'm going to keep it very short, polite and formal. Citing that I will give my four months notice so my last working day will be X. I will then put however that I have accrued holiday which, I want to use to reduce my last working day (to be calculated by HR).

But how on earth do I handle the actual face to face meeting with my boss? He is going to be so shocked and date I say it disappointed that I'm leaving. I don't think he would expect it at all.

What do I say if he asks me why I'm leaving?

What if he asks me when I've had interviews????

Do I do not at the end of the day or at the beginning?

I'm so nervous about telling him. Any advice would be so appreciated.

Ps I know this is a massive first world problem and I am very lucky to have secured a great new role.....I'm just super nervous about telling my boss that I'm leaving the company.

[peachypetite]

Honestly you are really over thinking this. Ask to have a word, take a deep breath and just say you're leaving for a great new opportunity and you'll do everything you can for a smooth handover.

[bookgirl1982]

Be positive. New opportunities etc. Being honest will only make your notice more difficult.

[Temporaryanonymity]

Agree you are over thinking....

[Asiaticlily]

I'd normally just write a short letter requesting that they accept this as formal resignation and your last day will be X date.

Depending on your relationship you can say thank you for the opportunities you've had/ you've enjoyed working there/ you have been offered a new role and are looking forward to a change etc.

I'd say that if your company offers an exit interview that may be a better time to bring up some of your comments as 4 months is a long time to work with someone after telling them how you feel!

[Poppyseed7]

Thanks everyone so far.....you are so right....I do always overthink everything lol :)

[IfYouDontImagineNothingHappens]

Don't burn your bridges or risk a future reference. Leave and just take it as a life lesson. You are better than they recognise.

[Arcadia]

I had to do this recently and was nervous but I just requested a meeting then said I had been offered a position elsewhere that was a great opportunity, it was was a difficult decision but I had decided to accept, etc. In my case I had been approached rather than me going out looking so I did mention this but really it is none of their business and tbh we are all replaceable - so the sky won't fall in!!!
Just do it, like tearing off a plaster or jumping into a cold pool.

[daisychain01]

Keep the resignation letter factual and short including your intended final day in line with your statutory notice period.

On a human level, just be as sincere as you're coming across on here ie you've enjoyed working with your manager, you'll be sad to leave but you've been offered a great new challenge. By the time you've come out with all that, I'm sure you're manager won't be bothered by minutiae of when you attended the interview!

Keep it short and sweet - although your boss is a nice person, he's there earning a living like you are.

[Pinkmexicanskull]

Brief resignation letter- save all of the stuff you’ve got grievances over for your exit interview. But keep it professional and honest, keep emotion out of it!

[SingaSong12]

Very brief resignation letter. If you like you can ask for a brief meeting to tell the boss in person, but have the letter with you so you can give them formal notice.

There might be a leavers form if you want to explain a little, but as you say that you may work there again be brief on the form, also saying what you like about the workplace.

[SleepFreeZone]

Oooh I like the ‘Ive been approached’ line given above (even if in your case it wasn’t true). That would stop the awkward interview questions and basically show them up for undervaluing what they had.

Just to add my DP who is in a well paid professional role has never worked his full notice. Even when it’s often something like three months he has always said he will work a month or similar and has never been sued. It just doesn’t happen. They are very lucky you are prepared to work four months notice!!