In over my head and don't know what to do please help!!

(7 Posts)
Keyz28 Thu 07-Sep-17 09:54:58

Iv been a stay at home mum iv came out of a very horrible break up i suffer with depression and anxiety I had to start claiming benefits I was on jobseekers for 8 weeks and I found a job working for a travel company but two months in iv realised I'm way over my head and I'm seriously stressed and it's making me ill but I'm scared to leave a job I know I'm not capable of doing as I'm scared I will lose my home as I won't be able to claim benefit due to leaving a job help I'm at breaking point

OP’s posts: |
GreyCloudsToday Thu 07-Sep-17 09:59:27

Can you tell us a few things about the problems you're having in your job? Is it a question of balancing family life and work, MH issues like anxiety, or specific skills-based problems in your daily tasks?

Two months is really early in a new job. I'd still expect things to be quite stressful, as you continue to learn the ropes -- especially after being back from child caring.

GatherlyGal Thu 07-Sep-17 10:04:17

It might be that you are much more capable than you realise. Can you pinpoint the things that are causing the stress?

Keyz28 Thu 07-Sep-17 11:38:48

I know I'm still learning the ropes and it takes time to learn but my boss get frustrated with me as i still get alot wrong and that i should be coming along alot quicker than i am it's a very social job and I have very little confidence I had an anxiety attack at work and my boss has on occasion has asked if I think I'm really suitable for the job which knocks my confidence more I'm relied on to do my hours as we are short staffed even if im unwell. I barely see my children and as we are going through a difficult time with their dad I just don't feel I can do it all my mental state is very unstable right now

OP’s posts: |
KarmaNoMore Thu 07-Sep-17 11:49:26

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GatherlyGal Thu 07-Sep-17 14:34:40

It is hard when work means you see less of your kids but remind yourself you are working to give them the things they need like a roof over their heads and food to eat. They are really benefiting from you working in so many ways even if it means you don't get as much time with them.

It is very hard when you become a single parent and have to take on all this extra responsibility so its not surprising you are finding it tough.

It's worth toughing it out as work if you can - every new job is hard particularly when you've had a spell of not working.

If it doesn't get easier then maybe look around for something that doesn't require the same level of social contact. It is much better though to not leave your job unless you have something else to go to.

Hang in there I do think things will get better.

GreyCloudsToday Thu 07-Sep-17 21:19:05

Sometimes anxiety makes it hard to listen well in the moment. Do you take notes in conversations with your boss? Do you have a big page-per-day diary that you can use to make daily to-do lists? It's brilliant to take 10 minutes at the start of the day to make a check list of what needs to get done. Then if you feel flustered or unconfident you have something concrete to refer back to.

Take it easy and take baby steps. You're setting a brilliant example to your kids getting out there and working. Are you getting any help for your anxiety? A trip to the GP might be helpful as it sounds like you have a lot going on. You could go on the waiting list for talking therapies or explore medication if your MH is not feeling that stable right now.

Problems with relationships and family can make the world seem really small and work is a way of pushing out into new things - getting your ex out of your hair and doing something for yourself.

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