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am I in the wrong here?

(21 Posts)
HomityBabbityPie Thu 11-May-17 15:40:10

I've just started a new job. I work from home 3 days a week (the whole organisation is remote). The other two days I have my toddler at home with me.

People keep asking me for calls or meetings on my non-working days. I have to say no and remind them of my working days because there's just no way I could concentrate on a call with my toddler around, he's always on the go. But they keep asking and I'm starting to think I'm being badly thought of for not saying yes.

Thoughts?

whereiscaroline Thu 11-May-17 15:43:25

Assuming you are paid for three days only, I would say stick to your guns. It's a slippery slope and in my experience you'll be working nearly full time whilst only being paid 60% of a full time wage!

If you're open to doing a little more where you can, would it be viable to speak to your manager and request overtime for any calls you take on your non working days?

HomityBabbityPie Thu 11-May-17 15:44:26

Yes I am definitely only paid for and contracted for three days, and they know I don't have any flexibility with which day I do because my son is at nursery and I can't just swap his days around.

whereiscaroline Thu 11-May-17 15:44:50

Sorry, just re-read and seen that it wouldn't be possible for you to do it. Stick to your current position - you're contracted for 3 days, so that's what you'll be doing.

If you want to appease then emphasise the "can't" rather than "wont".

whereiscaroline Thu 11-May-17 15:45:37

I'd also say that it might be worthwhile putting something in your email signature stating your working days, if you haven't already.

ProfYaffle Thu 11-May-17 15:49:20

Could it be that they just forget which days you work? If there are a few part timers/job share and you all work remotely it's easy to forget the working hours of individuals.

NapQueen Thu 11-May-17 15:50:12

Do you have a viewable calendar system? If so, block out every single day off now!

HomityBabbityPie Thu 11-May-17 15:52:33

My working days are in my signature, I have an out of office on my non working days and I have them blocked in my calendar too!!

SuburbanRhonda Thu 11-May-17 15:53:36

I'd also say that it might be worthwhile putting something in your email signature stating your working days, if you haven't already.

I have this on my emails - I work Monday, Wednesday and Friday. People still ignore it though.

NapQueen Thu 11-May-17 15:53:47

Do you have a work phone? Is it switched off on your off days?

HomityBabbityPie Thu 11-May-17 15:55:59

I use my personal mobile at the moment but people don't tend to call me anyway unless it's a pre arranged conference call - they email.

It's not so much people getting in touch on my day off which annoys me, it's more people asking me if I can do stuff on my day off - eg say my non working day is Tuesday, I'll get someone emailing me on Monday saying can you join a call tomorrow.

HmmOkay Thu 11-May-17 15:59:14

You could write down a response near your desk for when people ask for meetings on days you don't work. "I work Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday. I am unavailable on the other days".

Don't mention toddler, childcare or anything. Just say "unavailable".

Keep repeating exactly the same thing.

Or get in first with them. If they start to say "Okay, let's schedule a meeting.." then get in first and say "I am available Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday".

Hopefully this is just people getting used to things and won't continue too long. If it does then speak with your manager.

HmmOkay Thu 11-May-17 16:04:40

Sorry, cross-posted.

Just copy and paste the exact same thing when you get an email asking you to join a call on a non-working day:

"I work Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday. I am unavailable on the other days".

This puts the ball back in their court.

ShotsFired Thu 11-May-17 16:17:36

I was going to say exactly the same as @HmmOkay - "Don't mention toddler, childcare or anything. Just say "unavailable".

And the bit about getting in first too.

So basically everything HmmOkay said grin

JeanSeberg Thu 11-May-17 17:30:59

Is it a job share and is there someone that can take your place in these calls when you're not there? Do the calls involve customers?

purplemunkey Thu 11-May-17 17:45:40

Be firm and don't accept calls or meetings on your days off. If you do it once people will expect you to do it regularly.

I work 3 days, but office based so it's a bit easier as I'm visibly absent. When I started there were a few suggestions I switch my days this week or that to make a meeting but I just stuck to my guns said I couldn't, even if I may have been able to sort something with my partner. Same as you, my toddler is in childcare on my workdays and with me on my non work days. I wanted to stick to my days from the outset.

tammytheterminator Thu 11-May-17 18:20:48

People have minds like sieves. If they want a meeting, give them the days you are available. You don't have to apologise, just keep repeating the facts in the vain hope they finally get it.

HomityBabbityPie Thu 11-May-17 19:52:15

Is it a job share and is there someone that can take your place in these calls when you're not there? Do the calls involve customers?

No, and no. But the calls are all between employees so could easily be done when we're all in.

Even if they weren't it's irrelevant, the position was advertised at 3 days a week.

Indaba Thu 11-May-17 20:54:05

I do think it is worth talking to your manager. Not to moan or complain. Just explain what is happening, how it makes you feel, that you want to do your best at your work and support your colleagues but you want to assess if you are being judged for not being available and if so, what the work-around the issue is. She/he may say just chill, or explain yes its an issue so you can work on a solution together.

Agree VERY strongly about not mentioning child care etc. You do not have to explain what you do with your time out of hours. Just say you are unavailable.

If you jointly agree that you are needed on your off days, then you can reassess childcare etc. But at this stage: keep the kids out of it.

ImperialBlether Thu 11-May-17 20:57:12

Or agree to the meeting, give your child a sugar hit and let him enjoy himself! They won't ask again!

MaybeDoctor Thu 11-May-17 21:00:25

If you are going to compromise your non-working days, what's the point of being pt?

I have found that the stronger the boundary I put around my work/life balance then the more people respect it.

Be cheery, brisk and upbeat: 'Sorry, can't do that day. But I can do Wednesday'.

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