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Is this bullying? Or am I just crap?

(11 Posts)
BigFatWhooo Wed 11-Jan-17 12:48:24

Hi, I have namechanged for this.
I don't really know where to start. I think I'm being bullied, but I might be making a fuss about nothing.
I keep getting blamed for work not getting done by my colleagues even though I am not a manager. My role means I often have to specify work for other people to complete, which I do but nobody else keeps a record of what they're doing - I keep one of my work and will chase people up but in my last one-to-one was told this 'upset' people. So I stopped chasing for outstanding work and now I'm getting blamed for it not getting done. There's supposed to be a shared spreadsheet where all the tasks are added which I use religiously (because I know I need it written down) but I'm the only person who uses it for work so when reports need to be written I don't know what other members of the team have done and sometimes they can't tell me because they don't remember hmm. I'm getting the blame for all this even though I'm the only person who uses the sheet. I only work part-time (this was pushed on me because my child had some illness and I had to take some parental leave) but it seems that they are expecting me to know what other members of the team are working on when I'm not in, do a full time role and manage people when I'm not paid to be a manager.

I really want to just hand my notice in but we can't afford for me to do that. I am looking for another job.

Its making me feel like I can't do my job. I really used to love what I do, but now I feel like shit about myself and am paralysed with fear because it seems that everything I do is not good enough even though it really is.

For example, I tripled a 'bottom line' KPI in just 3 months, but because another KPI (which doesn't affect the bottom line) is stagnating (and had been falling before I started and I have turned that around but not got it to what it was before it slipped - which was before I worked there) I'm getting it in the neck. I just feel like I can't win.

daisychain01 Wed 11-Jan-17 14:08:28

Is there anything in your job description that covers you having to coordinate other people's work? Or keep track of progress to delivery times etc?

If it is in your duties and you are getting serious push back from the people who need to be giving you the info on progress, but are not, then I would have a discussion with your line manager and raise your concerns informally to try to get things resolved.

If you feel you are being bullied, then that is cause for concern. If the root cause of the bullying is due to you doing the progress chasing as part of your contracted duties, then you need support.

If none of what you have described in your OP is officially in your job description, but is something you have taken on, I would either get it formally added to your duties/objectives, or else not get involved in it, ie get your own work delivered to times but if other people don't, then that's their issue. If their late delivery affects your performance, that is also something to make known to your manager.

daisychain01 Wed 11-Jan-17 14:11:05

it seems that they are expecting me to know what other members of the team are working on when I'm not in, do a full time role and manage people when I'm not paid to be a manager

Who do you mean by "they" are expecting you?

Sounds like a concerning situation for you, can you keep some notes of times/dates/context of who is getting at you and giving you a hard time?

BigFatWhooo Wed 11-Jan-17 14:27:59

daisychain - My job description is vague. I am expected to produce client reports, which include work we've done for them in the month. This would be easy enough to do if the work spreadsheet was kept up to date by other members of the team, but it isn't. No one else seems to get in trouble for this, just me. And I'm the only person who keeps it up to date... As for coordinating people's wok, not exactly... I am a specialist and part of my job is to find errors that need fixing and raise tasks to other members of the team to get these jobs done. I raise the tasks, put deadlines on them and keep everything in a shared spreadsheet so that I can come back and chase when things don't get done. The spreadsheet is for everyone to use and all tasks should be included there but they're not. I'm getting in trouble because the client reports look like we haven't done much work but I've done my part and am now waiting on other people. I feel completely powerless.

The person who is bullying me (or who I feel bullied by) is the general manager and this is my line manager. It's a small company, there's only the general manager and then the business owner (who was on at me yesterday because of failures that happened before I started and the work I've done by its nature takes time but is recovering from the issues caused before I even worked there).

I've decided to hand my notice in tomorrow. I am looking at People Per Hour and am applying for other jobs. I just can't do this job any longer. My husband is being supportive of this decision even though it means money will be tight.

I do feel bullied though. I just don't know why or how I can make other team members keep good records if I'm not their manager and only work part time. I'm just feeling completely broken.

Thank you for responding to me. I need some hand-holding I think!

BigFatWhooo Wed 11-Jan-17 14:36:01

By 'they' I mean the general manager and the business owner.

daisychain01 Wed 11-Jan-17 15:24:23

It sounds like you are on a hiding to nothing, which is awful, but often the case when role descriptions are vague and you become the target and whipping-boy (or girl!)!for other people to deflect their inadequacies.

Your manager should be backing you up, not perpetuating the situation. If you don't have his/her support, no wonder everyone else is treating you with disrespect.

Take your skills elsewhere, you sound like you are super efficient - go where you will be appreciated. If you are handing in your notice tomorrow then just de stress because it's no longer your problem.

If I were you, in order to get a good reference, i would stay high level and vague about your reasons for leaving. You will gain nothing by trying to highlight their appalling behaviour, so stay on their good side, dont rock the boat (you could just say "I'm leaving for personal reasons") and come away with a reasonable reference in your hand, then onwards and upwards!

BigFatWhooo Wed 11-Jan-17 15:40:22

Thank you, daisychain. Yes, I think I'll probably write a 'thank your for the opportunity' resignation letter and say that I'm leaving for personal reasons. I have been compiling stuff for People Per Hour and have an appointment with a recruitment agency on Monday and sent my CV off to a company this afternoon. I am buggered if I'm going to continue working for these muppets (as my dear late dad would call them) if I can work elsewhere.

I have low self esteem (was in an abusive relationship for 10 years) and I think the general manager has picked up on this and is nasty enough to kick someone when they're down.

Ah well, I can beat em by leaving and getting something better or branching out on my own grin thank you for hand-holding, I had a panic attack earlier and was stressing out. But you've really helped me see it clearer. I appreciate that.

BigFatWhooo Wed 11-Jan-17 17:44:53

Hi, I just thought I'd tell you, daisychain that I have been invited to an interview on Monday afternoon! So onwards and upwards. Thank you for helping me through my wobble earlier, you have been incredibly supportive and helpful. flowers

EvaSthlm Wed 11-Jan-17 19:44:03

Great! Just a thought now you're on your way, not to let this thread hang out on the world wide web (I'm reading it out of Sweden) as you've written a lot of less flattering details about your current job. Google "fired over a tweet" and similar, and decide for yourself.

daisychain01 Wed 11-Jan-17 21:18:47

Well done, fantastic news getting something sorted. Good riddance to baaaad Muppets grin I love that expression.

Happy to have given you a handhold. No longer any need for low self esteem now, OK? Time for a new chapter in 2017 flowers

girlelephant Tue 17-Jan-17 17:44:16

Good luck!

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