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Help please! I can't make a decision!

(26 Posts)
ThreeBecameFour Sun 18-Dec-16 08:28:33

I have been offered a job at Director level in a sector I love but the salary is only £3k over my current one. It does provide an additional week a/l. It could be a career game changer. But the commute is 1.5hrs each way and could affect family life. When I applied it said salary:competitive which it wasn't. I have negotiated as much as I can. They have agreed flexible working and a day working from home. Basically matching my current work arrangements.

My current role is good but no room for progression until my boss leaves. The office will move in a year to make it a similar commute time. I have a lovely team and I have never not wanted to go into work. They are super flexible.

Had the new role offered a bit more £ it would have given us more options for childcare arrangements but we could cobble it together. The role is something I would really love to do. But the security of my current job is making me question what to do. Pros and cons list is equal.

Help me make a decision by the end of the day oh wise ones!

Lilaclily Sun 18-Dec-16 08:32:28

I would go for it , it sounds a great opportunity and you will kick yourself if you wait for your bosses job and then don't get it, or that post gets removed in a restructure bitter experience
Plus childcare woes are only long term, you have to look towards the future, the benefits to your family etc

Frollyhollyday Sun 18-Dec-16 08:33:35

I would go for the new position. In a year you will have enough experience to apply for other jobs offering better salaries.

Changing jobs improves your career prospects. If thats your intention then go for new job.

ThreeBecameFour Sun 18-Dec-16 09:04:11

Dh is worried i'd be out of the job market on a below average salary. I wouldn't move after a year as it would look like job hopping on my CV. I'd really need to stay 3 years minimum...

daisychain01 Sun 18-Dec-16 09:28:32

Several reasons I'd consider staying in your current role. -

continuity of employment , esp if you have been there > 2 years, you get employment rights. Eg they can't just sack you on a whim. In the new role they could anytime until you complete 2 years. In a Diector role, you could be more exposed to slings and arrows, politics ...

working environment you need to decide if 3k extra and a few days holiday is worth you leaving a known happy environment, for one that you don't know.

commute 3 hours out of your day, every day, on top of a demanding role. That's a lot of time. You say your current employers could be moving in a year. I'd take advantage of the next year continuing to build on the successes you already have. If they make you redundant, then you'll get a good package and I bet you get another job! Believe in yourself. Remember, you got the job offer for the new role, you'll do it again, but with another year's service and earnings in the bank, a good reference and time to get a new role.

I'm a bit hmm about Dh is worried i'd be out of the job market on a below average salary nice (not) how very dare he!

daisychain01 Sun 18-Dec-16 09:31:14

I agree that changing jobs can be good to gain experience, but not if the job move isn't particularly advantageous.

Be careful what you wish for, the grass isn't always greener....

oleoleoleole Sun 18-Dec-16 09:34:24

Better the devil you know. Be honest, you're disappointed about the salary of the new job anyway and if that's not great, perhaps other things won't be either. Sounds like you love where you are and have a great bunch of colleagues. I wouldn't risk a move at this stage.

MuchasSmoochas Sun 18-Dec-16 09:34:33

This is so annoying. I bet if they recruited externally they would pay more. This perpetuates the equal pay gap. I don't suppose you know the pay of other people doing the same promoted post?

MuchasSmoochas Sun 18-Dec-16 09:35:55

Oh for goodness sake ignore me I need more sleep! smile completely misunderstood the OP

CheckpointCharlie2 Sun 18-Dec-16 09:36:51

How much would the new role affect family life? Drastically or only a bit?
I would go for the new role if you have support at home. An extra week off a year and £3k sounds pretty good and it sounds like a step up which you are ready for!

daisychain01 Sun 18-Dec-16 09:43:25

They have agreed flexible working. Checkout some of the threads on here about the shenanigans companies play re flexible working. Just because they say it at interview doesn't guarantee it will always be plain sailing in the role. If your current job is proven flexible in their approach that is valuable!

FYI - 3K per annum on higher rate tax = buggier-all per month!

Not being negative, just giving a few thoughts on the possible downsides.

If you choose to go for it, it will still be a great opportunity if you're ready for change.

daisychain01 Sun 18-Dec-16 09:46:10

Sorry Bugger-all per month grin

you'll get about £20-30 per month nett. A few cappuccinos and lunch iow.

BrillianaHarvey Sun 18-Dec-16 09:52:20

What kind of a commute is it? Would you be able to sit down and catch up on emails, or would it be several legs with little hope of a seat?
The previous poster spoke wise words when saying if you've been offered a role at this level once you will be again. You could tell the new place that you will have to refuse the job on grounds of salary (which might suddenly change things, though I know you've already negotiated) and then keep hunting with a view to a move before your current office relocates.

OhTinky Sun 18-Dec-16 09:56:52

I'd stay in current role and keep looking, make it your resolution for 2017?!

I think a salary which is below your expectations + a long commute will just breed resentment very quickly. Presumably the increased salary will be spent on train/petrol, so it wouldn't be extra family money?

ThreeBecameFour Sun 18-Dec-16 10:15:56

Daisychain01 - DH is only worried that I wouldn't be being paid what I am worth.

The longer commute would be a long bus ride. This could impact on family if traffic sucks e.g. being later for kids pick up.

But the role has massive potential to be a good next step in my career in an area that I love...

BrillianaHarvey Sun 18-Dec-16 10:23:12

There will be others!
How old are your children? Is your husband in a position to take up any of the slack?
It sounds to me as though deep down you've made up your mind to take it, in which case go for it! I know you feel you should stay three years but leaving before then wouldn't be a disaster.

ThreeBecameFour Sun 18-Dec-16 10:27:51

I really haven't made the decision to do it. I am so torn. The children are 3 and 5. DH and I take up the slack at home 50/50...

HenryIX Sun 18-Dec-16 11:59:20

Do you think you would enjoy the new job? Job satisfaction is an important factor. I was offered a new job, a step up from where I was. My existing employer then offered me a promotion and pay rise to get me to stay.
After much thought, I took the external job, even though the salary was less, as I felt I would enjoy it more. I felt really excited about the external job, and just a bit 'meh' about the promotion.
So think about which you would enjoy most, it's important to enjoy what you have to do every day.

AgentProvocateur Sun 18-Dec-16 12:11:57

I wouldn't consider it for 3k more. Don't undersell yourself. There will be other opportunities next year that pay more.

EngTech Sun 18-Dec-16 12:21:17

£3K less tax at 40%, nope not worth it with the extra commute etc.

Main reason I have not accepted a number of jobs, not financially viable after tax plus the additional commuting times

daisychain01 Sun 18-Dec-16 12:43:27

Hard facts of business tho, you are paid what you are "worth", the value to the company employing you! It sounds like a 3K differential isn't exactly giving a clear message the new company are desperate to entice you away from your current role. Not being funny but unless they are offering significantly more fringe benefits, it's hardly worth you getting out of bed for!

Hopefully the different perspectives on here will help you make the right move for you and your family.

museumum Sun 18-Dec-16 12:47:16

On that balance of pros and cons then I'd go purely for what you want to do. Do you want to do the new job, does it excite you? Are you bored where you are?
A first "director" job on my sector is valuable on the cv.

ThreeBecameFour Wed 21-Dec-16 13:28:28

Thanks for all your support guys. Just to update you on what happened as it might help others in a similar situation. I went back to the job offer and said I couldn't take the role on the salary offered. After 3 days of hard negotiations they finally offered what I needed! It was the hardest career decision and negotiations I have stood firm on. Mainly due to DH saying I couldn't sell myself short or I probably would have given in. Just goes to show how men and women approach these things so differently! I think I did a annoy them but I accepted the role yesterday on the salary of wanted. Lesson of the day: believe in yourself!

HenryIX Wed 21-Dec-16 17:59:21

Well done.Hope you love the new job.

BrillianaHarvey Wed 21-Dec-16 20:35:18

Congratulations! And, as you say, a lesson to all of us. Enjoy the new job!

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