I've been in my current job 2 years now, after sticking it out for a year and doing well, I knew I needed to find something else before trying for a baby, but I just couldn't find anything suitable despite having a number of interviews.
Myself (and others in the team) are constantly overshadowed when competing for opportunities due to favouritism by management. I've even been told my manager previously that I should probably leave the business, rather than supported and encouraged to excel in my role which has the potential to be an enjoyable job, if only I could get a look in for projects which would be great for my development. Instead I seem to get the dross and I feel like I've become de-skilled following the jobs I've had previously. I've had a number of conversations with my manager to get to a better place but I get nowhere (despite being solution-focused and trying to avoid being negative and moaning!)
Anyway, it was getting to the point where my confidence took a real knock after not getting an internal secondment role I applied for in another team. I was so gutted, the feedback was poor, personal and not very constructive. This was nearly 5 months ago. I've discussed this with my manager and she just said I need counselling and wasn't all that helpful.
A couple weeks later I found out I was pregnant and DH and I were delighted. First thing manager asked was 'so I take it you're not going to leave us now then?' I know I've only got til Jan when I start mat leave, but I find it so awful and my confidence is the lowest it's ever been at work. I'm dreading my performance review, feel trapped, a failure, with nothing to offer and I won't be going back after mat leave.
Aside from work I'm happy in myself and enjoying pregnancy aside from usual gripes we go through!
Does anyone have any advice to help me tough it out for the next few months, and what I could try to increase my confidence at work?