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What do you think?

(6 Posts)
messystressy Sat 01-Oct-16 21:55:45

I work in a male-dominated sector where there is a lot of office jokes, usually at someone's expense. But I was outside of the office, entertaining one of my clients with a colleague. After two drinks (so not drunk) my colleague told my client, while I was standing next to him, that I am not very good at my job and gave reasons why this was the case. There was no punchline - just an awkward silence, and the conversation was quickly changed (by me). Could you see any scenario where this would be a joke? As far as I can see, even if it was a joke, it was a dangerous joke in that the client could have accepted it as truth. Joke, or is my colleague just an asshole?

FlyingCat Sat 01-Oct-16 21:58:33

He's a complete dickhead - put in a grievance to HR as he'all likely do it to other women too.

messystressy Sat 01-Oct-16 22:38:58

Thanks, it's good to hear that. I've going over and over it in my head, and felt like I lost perspective or was being extra-sensitive.

Toomanypegs Sat 01-Oct-16 23:13:32

What flying cat said.

I had a similar situation on a night out where a colleague who had had a drink, called me out on a decision I had made at work. Made a bit of a scene. Also a male dominated sector.
I walked away at the time but arranged a meeting with him the next day, making sure another member of staff was present, and told him it wasn't acceptable and he had put me in an awkward position.
He claimed he didn't remember but apologised anyway hmm
I hate confrontation but I just felt I had to show him he couldn't behave that way.
Unfortunately sometimes you have to teach people how to treat you.

blueshoes Sun 02-Oct-16 00:04:38

Yes, call him out on it. Stand your ground or he will escalate.

messystressy Sun 02-Oct-16 07:45:26

That's a really good idea, having another member of staff present. He's a very aggressive person, so would appreciate the witness to keep things professional. There's something for me to look forward to this week. Thanks again for feedback!

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