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Very unhappy in current job, got job interview but discovered pregnant

(5 Posts)
chaoticmum2b Thu 29-Sep-16 20:12:12

I work in marketing, following a career change from law. However, as I was so desperate to get out of law I accepted what appeared to be a good job opportunity to get my foot in the door for marketing. However, the sales/marketing role initially was more salesy and it took me 2.5 years to get the experience needed to leave (he was a horrible boss with high turnover and used to p**s suppliers off so much by talking down to them that some refused to work with him).

I then jumped at the first chance out of there - perhaps rather stupidly now. I should have negotiated a better payrise but saw it as a step in to learn off people. Everyone with experience left and it is disorganised chaos. I am expected to work ridiculous hours (sometimes 12 hour days) for 18k and am told agency work is not a 9 to 5 job. I have tried to stick it out but can't see the situation improving (although I am getting very good results for a new client, which could work out well but they are extremely demanding and I need to get to grips with engineering and nuclear power plants, etc, so lots of additional out of hours research.)

I had planned to leave and would prefer to go in-house. I know I could get around 25k and am really underpaid. However, we thought we would stop using contraception and "see". I had issues with my periods where I assumed it would take forever / I was infertile but I got pregnant immediately. I thought I couldn't keep putting family life on hold as I had hoped that by this time I would be settled in a good job with career prospects, so who's to say I won't keep waiting for things to improve. I'm nearly 32 and want 2 kids, and like I said, I thought I had issues.

Now I'm in a position where a job I was contacted about on LinkedIn before I found out wants me to meet them. It's a small agency but doing more interesting stuff and so I think I would have to be honest (informally, so as not to get them into trouble legally). I have applied for other roles in-house with bigger companies but waiting to hear back.

I can't possibly continue working under these conditions when pregnant and I've also got to think of the fact I could earn a lot more in the future, which would help my child. Equally, it is harsh on an employer.

What do people think I should do? Is it that bad to interview when pregnant? Going to get an early scan in a few weeks so I know if it's a viable pregnancy. I really want the baby obviously, but the reality of how much I have screwed up my potential in life along the way and having to explain to a child that mum was really bright at school but didn't amount to anything in life also gets me, so I want to change. Equally, I do have a business idea (which would use my marketing skills), so not sure if this is just a sign to work on that on maternity!

chaoticmum2b Thu 29-Sep-16 20:13:31

Oh god, that was SO long and first time on here so not sure how to delete!

PurpleRainy Mon 03-Oct-16 19:11:22

Go for the job! If you get it they cant withdraw offer on pregnancy as its sex discrimination. Congrats aswellflowers

potentialqualms Mon 03-Oct-16 19:23:22

Depends what the maternity benefits are at your current place. Where I am it's up to 6 months full pay, then a further 6mths at SMP but only you have 12 months' continuous service at EDD.

flowery Mon 03-Oct-16 20:17:26

"I think I would have to be honest (informally, so as not to get them into trouble legally)"

I'm intrigued as to how you'd be honest 'informally'. How is that different? And the manner in which you are honest won't make a difference as to whether they get into trouble legally. Their own behaviour would decide that.

Don't burden them with information they are not allowed to take into account. It won't help them or you. They have to disregard it so why tell them.

If they offer you the job it might be because you're best for the job or it might be because they're worried about discrimination claims. You won't know which it is, and if it's the second one they'll resent you.

If they don't offer you the job it might be because there is a better candidate or it might be because of the pregnancy. You won't know which it is.

Maternity leave is a short time in the scheme of things, so if you want the job, go for the interview, and make sure you give them the opportunity to make up their mind about you based only on relevant information.

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