solicitor - move firms and wait to ttc or just go for it

(12 Posts)
harrietm87 Fri 13-May-16 08:26:49

Hi all. My dilemma is similar to Almondbiscottis but didn't want to hijack thread.

I'm 29 and 2pqe in disputes in a city law firm. I was planning to start ttc in August this year. But my department has changed a lot recently and I think that ultimately I want to move firms. This is a good juncture in my career in which to do so and the market is quite fast moving atm.

But if I move I will have to delay ttc for 1 - 2 years. The alternative is to wait until after the baby before moving, but that means delaying the move for 1-2 years.

Will it be harder to move at 4pqe with a year of mat leave? Is it stupid to delay ttc until age31/32?

If anyone knows how long you have to work before you can get enhanced mat leave at the big firms let me know!

Alanna1 Fri 13-May-16 08:31:29

It will all depend on the firm. Lots of women don't have children till their 30s in law. It is easier to be more senior when you have kids, too. most of my friends with dimilar options to you have had their child and then job hunted when finished with having babies.

BonerSibary Fri 13-May-16 12:06:59

It's not stupid to ttc at 31, but why would you have to wait two years if you move? Enhanced maternity pay?

sunshine7981 Fri 13-May-16 12:14:01

Hello I'm a lawyer and I would recommend pursuing your career ie finding new role and working as hard as possible for a few years before ttc. Law is one of those professions where in order to progress and make partnership etc hours in the office do count. It's sad that that's the case but I can't see it changing anytime soon. I had child at 31, which is 3/4 years earlier than I would have liked from a career perspective because my husband is 10 years older than me and he didn't want to be too old. But it has made career progression much more difficult because I am simply not willing to put in long hours.

harrietm87 Fri 13-May-16 16:28:58

Hello thanks for the responses. Yes it's for enhanced mat pay. I'm the breadwinner and i couldn't afford to take time off without it. Is it harder to move firms after one or two mat leaves do you think?

BonerSibary Fri 13-May-16 16:38:51

I've moved loads and if anything done well out of it, and had my kids earlyish too, but I'm not City. Pretty much the exact opposite end of the profession to you!

Rangirl Sat 14-May-16 13:07:57

Having seen lots of friends have trouble conceiving if you want a baby I would not put it off Sadly as a solicitor who is a mother you are highly likely to be discriminated against O don't think you can necessarily protect yourself from it or second guess your employers

MillieMoodle Sat 14-May-16 13:21:03

I had DS when I was 27 and 2.5 years qualified. We were lucky in that it only took a month to conceive. I moved firms when he was 2 and didn't find it a problem. I did feel that I had to wait before ttc again once I'd moved firms. I'm now pregnant with DC2 and DS is 5. Would have liked a slightly smaller age gap, but it wasn't to be; we were ttc for a year with this one!

I would start ttc now and then look to move after a year or so back from maternity leave. That's what I did and it has worked well for us as a family and also in terms of my career. I'm not a partner yet but I accept that it's going to take me longer to get there and to be honest I don't really want that level of responsibility while I have very small children. I'm very lucky to be at a firm which is family friendly and understands the importance of a good work/life balance though. Good luck smile

anniebambammie Fri 27-May-16 16:26:29

harrietm87 I'm also in a similar position and just hijacked almondbiscotti's thread blush I've just had my first, took 10 months mat leave and now am considering whether to move / stay and TTC number 2. I'm not moving to a different firm though, it's more of an in house type role.
It's a very personal choice but I've found that my perspective on big firm life changed dramatically after having a baby and I personally am glad I didn't wait longer to TTC (im 5yrs pqe, 4yrs when I went on mat leave) I am not technically the 'breadwinner' though so this probably influences that thinking. I've never made a decision that wasn't based on career advancement- now it looks like I'll be making one based on family and balance, which is a hard thing to get my head around (almost walking away from something I worked so hard for) but it feels right. The job is manageable now, but I know that the more senior I get the more responsibility I will get and that just doesn't work with what I want my role at home to be. I didn't used to think like that though! Good luck, it's such a tough one!!

whydidhesaythat Wed 01-Jun-16 23:48:10

I think it is naive to think you can plan ahead nowadays!
Do you have a partner who will be main carer? If so what does s( he) want to do?
I agree that changing jobs with two chldren will be hard,I would stay put

whydidhesaythat Wed 01-Jun-16 23:52:29

Also I think if you want the child have the child rather than waiting

Real life isn't like litigation. You cant be calculating how to be three chess moves ahead, because love comes into it.( and so does discrimination and so do recessions)

ExConstance Fri 10-Jun-16 13:14:19

It is one of the problems with a legal career. I moved firms when I got married, wanted to wait a while before a baby anyway but then was offered a partnership and decided they needed a couple of years with me in that role before I tried, then I was headhunted to another firm and had to give them 2 years, so by the time DS1 was born it was over 6 years after I got married and over 3 years more than I wanted it to be. I don't even work in law now!

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