Advanced search

Grasp the next rung of the career ladder

Find jobs that fit your kills and your home life with Mumsnet jobs

See all jobs »

My boss is driving me slowly insane!

(2 Posts)
pepperfish Wed 21-Jan-15 09:11:56

I'm currently managing a small team and their associated paperwork and pay as maternity cover.

My title has never been changed (it reads the same as my other collegues) although I got a tiny wage increase of £1000pa subject to targets being met, after me asking. When I asked about the title, it got brushed off as "oh you Brits are so obsessed with titles! You're doing a great job, stop worrying"

One member of the team is very loud, outspoken, constantly does things I would regard as sackable (walking out, being repeatedly rude to other staff, refusing to do tasks well within her job description). I deal with these as best I can, but struggle as his method of tackling them if I can't get through to her is to take her out for a coffee and give her a fatherly talking to (she usually comes back and smugly says something along the lines of 'ah that wasn't that bad - he wants me to help you more, because you have a lot on your plate'). She's constantly disrupting the other team members, laughing and joking around and is sarcastic when I speak to her about it. She's the only one who is like this but it's daily battle. I've told him next time she does something like walking out, I expect us to take her to a formal disciplinary, as I'm fed up of going round in circles.

Yesterday he says to me "I don't want to offend anyone here, but how about we get X (another manager from another department) to come in for a few days and sort this lot out?" I asked how - he said "oh you know, put the fear of god into them, get things shipshape".

Literally what I've spent the best part of a year doing, but am constantly having to battle his awful management techniques, and pick up the pieces from staff who think if they misbehave they get taken out for coffee and are under no illusions that their jobs are not at risk if they violate their contracts!

Meanwhile he seems to feel it appropriate to constantly make me look useless, refuses to change my title and then wonders why this member of staff doesn't respect me?! (The others are fine generally and he tells me if I ask that he thinks I am doing a good job).

I'm so tempted to throw the towel in, but I've worked so hard this year to produce what is actually a really nice respectful team, minus the troublemaker.


Optimist1 Wed 21-Jan-15 09:50:03

He sounds like an arse. Instead of making it clear to all the team members that you are their manager and will have his support in managing things he undermines you. A change of title would make it clear to everyone that you have the authority to be managing them, even if it was something like "Acting Manager". Dealing with the troublemaker should be your job with advice and backup from him . But you know all this already.

Sadly, having encountered this type before, I don't think his behaviour is likely to change, and nor is the troublemaker's. Now that you have some management experience it might be a good time to look for a position elsewhere. Make sure that management training is something that a new employer could offer. In the meantime some self-help books that include dealing with difficult people might save your sanity and help you cope.

Sorry if that sounds as though I'm saying the current situation is all down to you - I don't. It's just that you're unlikely to be able to change his attitude (and by extension the troublemaker's), so you need to change what you can.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now