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Worrying treatment of colleague\friend

(13 Posts)
Thattimeofyearagain Mon 17-Feb-14 07:41:32

I have worked alongside a colleague for nearly 8 years who has become a good friend ( meals out, meet up over hola\ Xmas , our dc socialise) We no longer work in the same dept and have little interaction at work on a day to day basis.
My friend is signed off work at the moment, but I have been pre warned that I may be told by my immediate supervisor today that I am not to contact her, due to an incident last week. As she is off ill NOT suspended, or indeed had any allegations put to her can they do this ?

kimlo Mon 17-Feb-14 07:44:41

how do you know she hasnt been suspended? she probably just hasnt told you

has she contacted you?

Thattimeofyearagain Mon 17-Feb-14 07:50:04

I took her home from the doctors, she has a sick note in, not suspended as its a he said / she said situation & the other party had the weekend to decide if he wished to take it further.
Its basically bullying, with the company choosing to back the bully.

Thattimeofyearagain Mon 17-Feb-14 07:51:19

She hasn't told me any of this, her line manager was discussing it loudly in the canteen.

JeanSeberg Mon 17-Feb-14 07:54:35

I'd advise her to get legal advice ASAP and raise a grievance with the company. Is she in a union?

kimlo Mon 17-Feb-14 07:55:17

he shouldnt have been doing that

I would contact her this morning and warn her before I was officially told not too

but I'm not in anyway an expert thats just what I would do

pussycatdoll Mon 17-Feb-14 07:57:18

I would stay out of it tbh

Thattimeofyearagain Mon 17-Feb-14 08:01:11

Hi Jean, yes, she is in a union.
Kimlo, I will do that.
Pussycatdoll its hard tho when its a friend, but I can see where your coming from.

JeanSeberg Mon 17-Feb-14 08:17:48

Tell her to see her union rep and a solicitor. Hopefully she has kept a diary of everything that's happened - copied of emails, minutes of meetings, performance appraisals etc etc.

And raise a grievance - most companies fall down by failing to correctly follow the procedure.

Then I'd take a step back till it's all sorted.

BonaDea Mon 17-Feb-14 08:47:56

Sorry to say it but lots of people who are in trouble at work immediately go to the doctor to be 'signed off with stress'. Happens all the time and completely undermines those who are genuinely suffering.

I'm not saying that your friend has done this but that the fact she is off sick doesn't mean an incident definitely didn't occur, that's all.

In any event, work can't really stop you seeing someone in your private life, but if you do choose to see her I'd steer clear of work chat altogether.

Hoppinggreen Mon 17-Feb-14 09:32:58

I was suspended once a long time ago. Colleagues were advised they should not discuss work matters with me but the company had no powers to stop any social interaction

Thattimeofyearagain Mon 17-Feb-14 11:28:24

Bona, she is off with shingles, not stress.

BrownSauceSandwich Mon 17-Feb-14 18:01:22

Glad she's in a union. Are you? If so, you might want to just have a quiet word with a rep to ask about your situation, especially if you are formally warned not to speak to her. It sounds like you have at least one dicky manager there (discussing this situation in the canteen hmm), so it'd be sensible to know where you stand.

Otherwise, I rather agree with BonaDea that it'd be sensible to stay off the subject of work (except to encourage her to get onto the union). I don't really see that your employer can dictate who you see in your spare time.

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