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I need some guidence - or somebody to listen while I offload

(29 Posts)
stuckATwork Wed 24-May-06 20:57:09

Sorry for the name change. I am a regular poster, but I know a lot of people at work who surf mumsnet and dont want to give the game away.
This may be long, if so, firstly, sorry, and secondly, thanks for sticking through it! Mostly I just want to offload.
I have been employed by the same employer for three years. I stumbled into the job, and I am quite low paid compared to the rest of the team. I lack confidence in my abilities, mostly because I am not study taught like the vast majority of fellow employees, but experience taught though the jobs I have had.
I have returned from maternity leave, been back for a good few months so it isn't me feeling unsettled about returning. I am just very fed up at the moment. After paying my childcare and bills I have literally pennies left for me for the rest of the month. I am constantly dumped with work from those higher than me and asked questions from those senior who do not understand the job. Aside from that, I love my work. I enjoy what I do and know that aside from pay I have things pretty easy - flexi-time, good amount of holidays etc etc.
I resent being poorly paid, but I like my work. I resent that those employed after me are on more money for doing the same job, but in most cases I get on really well with my team mates.
I have seen a job advertised which is basically everything that I do, with a little more added in that I think I could do. But the idea of actually uprooting and going elsewhere frightens the life out of me. Even the idea of having an interview makes me panic.
I know I need to think about my family, and do what is best for them. I say I work to give a better life for my child, but what am I actually giving if I am working for nothing? What would you do? Speak to management in current job to see if I could possibly have a raise? (They say I am needed and they want me to stay, but the pay packet doesn't show what they are saying). Or go for the interview, panic my way through it and end up depressed afterwards when I dont get the job?
I am worried that going for another position will result in me feeling depressed and even more trapped at work (no way out) if I dont get it.

browniechick Wed 24-May-06 21:08:52

Hhm, - difficult one. Do you get on well with your line manager? COuld you express how you feel to them? Explain that you feel that you are not as valued as the rest of the team, and that whilst you appreciate that you may not be able to have an immediate pay rise (ok, so we are stretching the truth about how you feel here, but use it for effect) that you were hoping that this may be a possibility in the future.

You never know, explaining how you feel and how the situation amkes you feel, may make you feel better.

If it is a secure environment, and a job and team you enjoy, then speaking to someone may help?

Not sure this is what you want to hear?

Just think that going for another job interview, and putting yourself through uncertainty, may put you in an emotional place you don't want or need to be right now.

HTH - Good luck

Brownie

stuckATwork Wed 24-May-06 21:12:12

Thanks for the reply.
I have spoken to my line manager, not explicity, and both my line manager and their boss have given me the speil "we couldnt do without you" but that's it.
I feel as if I have mug written on my forehead, as if saying those things to me can pay my bills, or resolve the fact that I'm the lowest paid team member but one of the longest serving.
I guess it's a no win situation, but writing it all down has helped me!

browniechick Wed 24-May-06 21:23:44

That's the key, well one of them - to unburden yourself, so that it does not wiegh you down.

Would it be worth talking to them again and saying, I know we've spoken about this before, but...... and explain that whilst they say they value you and appreciate you and indeed to quote them, they could not manage without you - it does not feel like this, especially when you consider that you are the lowest paid member of the team, yet you are the longest serving? Perhaps if they heard it like that they may consider a little extra? If you felt like pushing them, you could perhaps say, whilst I don't really want to look elsewhere, it is getting to the point where money constraints may mean you have to.....
I am juts thining aloud here, so forgive me if you have tried or don't feel you could try these things.

Like you say, just unburdening yourself of such worries, means they are less likely to get you down.

Chin Up Chick.

We know you are worth millions

Brownie

stuckATwork Wed 24-May-06 21:33:45

Aw, thanks!

My OH has been saying to try the "whilst I don't really want to look elsewhere, it is getting to the point where money constraints may mean you have to....." so I may try that.

I'll let you know how it goes.

browniechick Wed 24-May-06 21:35:32

You're welcome. Please do let me know how it goes.

Brownie

katzg Wed 24-May-06 21:38:27

by applying for an other job it might give them the kick up the backside they need to appreciate you.

Go for it, basically what have you got to loose, if you don't apply you wont get the job if you apply and get no where what have you lost however you have verything to gain

DominiConnor Thu 25-May-06 00:39:35

Also interviews are good practice. I'm a pimp, and it's quite noticeable how much this is a learned skill.
To an extent it may be good that you're not going for a dream job. Would be bad to bungle the interview for that. Better to bungle an average job, and learn from your mistakes.
Also don't get taken down by initial failure to get a new job. Fact is that often 5 and as many as 10 people may be interviewed for a post. Coming 2nd doesn't get you in, so 80-90&% of everyone who gets and interview doesn't get the job. You're not a failure until you give up.

Mytwopenceworth Thu 25-May-06 00:51:05

DC-you're a pimp?

sorry stuck at work. - if you would actually like to stay where you are if only they would stump up more cash but asking them is only getting you fobbed off, you could try applying for a job you dont want. go to your manager and book a half day - tell him/her its for your job interview. be very apologetic and say how awful it is, but sadly, you just HAVE to look for something that pays more. Seeing you leave early to go to your job interview and getting a reference request may make them rethink, no pressure for you cos you dont WANT the job, and if current employer doesnt come up with the cash ad you have to actually look elsewhere, at least you had interview practice.

seriously DC - a pimp?

threebob Thu 25-May-06 02:24:45

Be careful though that it doesn't sound like you earn no money because you pay out in childcare.

I also don't think it's helpful to you personally to consider that your money pays bills and childcare - half of both of those are paid by OH.

pedilia Thu 25-May-06 07:58:48

I would put in writing to your line manager requesting a response, asking for a payrise outline exactly what you do and why you feel you are worth more.
Apply for the other job anyway, I would't use that as a bargaining tool though it may backfire. Mention it and say you feel undervalued and then leave it at that.

CarlK Thu 25-May-06 08:13:05

This *may* be relevant

zubin Thu 25-May-06 08:27:28

Your firm should have a regrading policy so have a look and see what it says. I am doing regradings for my team at the moment and I have asked them to look at their job descriptions and see if there is things that they do that aren't in there, then collect together comparators (other jobs of equivalent responsibility, skill levels etc) but that are paid more, either in your organisation (they need to think about equal opps) and outside so they know that you could command a higher salary elsewhere. I would formally ask for your job to be regraded, ask them face to face first but you could put a request in writing and present them with the evidence you have collected. I am getting an outside org to do the regrading but the team will get an explanation in writing as to how the decisions have been made, then based on that they can make their decisions

slug Thu 25-May-06 10:40:24

Apply for the other job. You don't have to take it if it's offered to you, but you could use it as a bargaining chip when asking for a raise.

clerkKent Thu 25-May-06 12:34:38

Don't undervalue that "aside from pay I have things pretty easy - flexi-time, good amount of holidays etc etc. " - another job might not be so flexible. Also there is no guarantee you would even get an interview - I regard an interview in itself as a success (proving the CV is good).

Does the other job offer much more money? If so, could you show the ad. to your boss and say - look, I can do this!

DC is a professional recruitment executive - that is what he means by pimp.

bythesouthsea Thu 25-May-06 13:31:46

Just read up on this thread - out of interest how many of your collegues are working mothers? If you can prove that you are being unfairly paid against them for the same job etc it could almost be construed as constructive dismissal. Companies often operate off the back of working mums who so often a) need the money so don't make a fuss and b)are fitter, healthier and are better Mansagers! (see recent articles in
The Times!). If you have the confidence I really believe that you should be honest with them, and say that having raised this before that you are dissapointed it hasn't been rectified etc etc (putting in writing is best) and actively go for the other position. I've seen so many people be loyal for companies before and in the long long term it just doesn't pay. If you still have all the same flexibility with potential more money then I wouldn't hesitate - 3 years is a good time on your CV.

bythesouthsea Thu 25-May-06 13:32:45

Just read up on this thread - out of interest how many of your collegues are working mothers? If you can prove that you are being unfairly paid against them for the same job etc it could almost be construed as constructive dismissal. Companies often operate off the back of working mums who so often a) need the money so don't make a fuss and b)are fitter, healthier and are better Mansagers! (see recent articles in
The Times!). If you have the confidence I really believe that you should be honest with them, and say that having raised this before that you are dissapointed it hasn't been rectified etc etc (putting in writing is best) and actively go for the other position. I've seen so many people be loyal for companies before and in the long long term it just doesn't pay. If you still have all the same flexibility with potential more money then I wouldn't hesitate - 3 years is a good time on your CV.

skerriesmum Thu 25-May-06 13:51:45

Am I the only other person who thinks it's really weird that DC is a pimp? Does this have another meaning besides working in the sex trade?

JackieNo Thu 25-May-06 14:01:58

Skerriesmum, see clerkKent's post below - DC means he's a recruitment consultant.

skerriesmum Thu 25-May-06 14:08:03

Ooohhhh
Still, that must confuse a lot of people!

DominiConnor Thu 25-May-06 20:52:26

I call myself a pimp because when I had a proper job I called Headhunters pimps. Thus I think it would be wrong to change now.
We actually use "pimp" to discriminate ourselves from the competition who would get all soggy if someone called them that. We have a reputation for not taking ourselves too seriously and for telling it like it is.
Our niche is people who do maths for banks.

Mytwopenceworth Fri 26-May-06 05:33:56

are they your whores then?

threebob Fri 26-May-06 09:30:31

Maths whores - I know a couple of those.

expatinscotland Fri 26-May-06 09:31:55

Go for the interview. If you get the job, tell your boss. They may counteroffer w/more money.

mummyofeb Fri 26-May-06 12:17:53

DC,
are you the accountant? I'm a maths whore! Will you give me a training contract?????????!!!!!!

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