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DH thinks jobs like this exist - can we tell him the reality?

(113 Posts)
grants1000 Thu 21-Feb-13 11:12:51

DH thinks I can esily get a job that fits the following criteria:-

School hours eg: 9.15 - 3.00 (so I can always pick up the children)
3 days a week 9-5.15 (giving me enough time to drop & pick up children from before & after school club because this job apparently will be local)
That will be flexible for me and me only to work at home the days they are ill becuase he won't be able to ever.
That is still gives me enough time to be responsible for all the housework, shopping and cooking because he won't have the time.

I work from home now because it fits in with school hours and his job, he's away a lot, no fixed times of being in, could have a meeting in London one day, Glasgow the next, may stay over may come home etc etc. His point is that I don't earn much and I should and could earn more, my home business is just a "won't come to much" and I should get a proper job. My "won't come to much" is in it's infancy and just getting going.

So tell me how it is.


prozacbear Sun 24-Feb-13 12:48:43

I've come to this late - but as a recruiter for a large business I can tell you that I have never and probably would never recruit someone on this basis. And I say that as a mother who is VERY sympathetic to people who need flexi-time or other considerations.

I have just about managed to wrestle flexi-time from my employers, on the understanding that I make up the time on days I'm not flexi, and am 'on call' (phone and email) on the days I am flexi. My career hasn't stalled (thank the lord) but only because DS goes to nursery 7.30am-6pm every day - thankfully he loves it, but it's not ideal.

There are no perfect solutions, but if you CAN make your business work (if your business plan is solid and there's a market, why not, I see it happen every week) then that's probably a great option.

bunchofposy Sat 23-Feb-13 13:56:42

WishId, I agree ref publishing pay!

OP I agree with math that you could really do with your DH's support to see if you can make something of your business, before looking elsewhere.

mathanxiety Sat 23-Feb-13 05:50:32

It strikes me that he is jealous of your freedom to work from home. Even though your business hasn't generated a profit, I have an idea that this man feels very sorry for himself and is jealous that your business could in the end generate income without any of the drawbacks his job has. Or he could be just jealous that you are not shouldering the white man's burden...

If you think about it, suggesting you get a job when you are getting your own business off the ground is a huge insult to your business and your capacity to make something of it.

WishIdbeenatigermum Fri 22-Feb-13 22:45:06

Pay is poor in publishing too- I'm horrified to see posts I applied for 20 years ago still advertised at the same rate shock.

bunchofposy Fri 22-Feb-13 17:01:27

I have a job like that. I work for a publisher, but think I was quite lucky to get those kind of flexible hours in that industry. I pay for it in job satisfaction though!

I am being made redundant next year, and have been job browsing for jobs with similar hours for the past 18 months. The ones I have seen are mainly admin ones at the council, local hospitals or at the University, but I'll admit haven't really been looking elsewhere. Pay isn't great mind.

WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeGoes Fri 22-Feb-13 13:49:27

I do all our drop offs and pickups as a rule because I have the school hours job, however my employer does occasionally require me to work an entire 8.30-5.30 day, in which case DH has no hesitation in taking time out to pick up the DCs - we can use after school club which helps. He is also willing to take time off when they are sick so I don't have to bear the entire load. My employer knows this and I suspect he may have been a bit more wary of offering me the job if he thought I had no backup whatsoever (he knows my DH, which is how I came to be considered for the job in the first place, it was never advertised).

I also have 5 weeks holiday the same as everyone else, so have to use clubs for school holidays, but I am able to switch my p/t days around in order to not take days off for random events such as harvest festivals.

I do know couples where the husband is a high flyer, away on business, long hours, unable/willing to help with any childcare responsibilities, but in every case they are either happy for the wives to not work, or the wives have family/friends as backup and flexible jobs.

theoriginalandbestrookie Fri 22-Feb-13 12:30:33

What sort of work are you doing from home? I'm just wondering if he is annoyed because it's a hobby type thing rather than income generating?

I do agree though that school time hours are almost impossible to find. I more or less have them as I went back after mat leave, but I decided to go down a grade in order to actually make it feasibly otherwise they just expected full time output for part time salary.

I have to do all of the drop offs and pick ups as DH is a contractor and his job is an hour commute each way. Occasionally I have to travel and then he just goes in late and finishes early. My parents are too old to assist and we don't have any local relatives although I would help out other parents and they would do the same for me.

What age are your children as well as I don't think you posted that? He may have more of a point if they are in their teens.

OBface Fri 22-Feb-13 10:29:00

These sort of jobs only exist IME to those already in a role where their skills and expertise are valued enough for their employer not to want to lose them. Otherwise they are simply not available unless you are willing to undertake an unskilled job with little prospects.

MoreBeta Fri 22-Feb-13 10:08:12

There are jobs like your DH describes but I think he has to be realistic about the earnings and the availability. They are very much harder to get with the recession.

I am lucky enough to work from home but I have very specialist knowledge.

Jobs that fit school hours, and 3 days a week and flexible are in very high demand and the pay tends to be extremely low as a result.

I have a female friend who became a school secretary but she has a very good degree and working far below her ability. Another woman I know with a PhD and far far better qualified than the Headteacher is also a school secretary.

Call centre operators sometimes work form home during school hours but the criteria are very strict. Public sector and charities used to have a fair number of jobs like that but they are being cut in number and in pay levels.

Gintonic Fri 22-Feb-13 09:48:18

Unless you are in very serious financial difficulties he is being an absolute idiot. Do you need / want to earn more money? Perhaps he should be finding a job that enables him to pull his weight at home more?

I have a job that almost fits your husband's criteria, however it involves an hour long commute each way, and so my DP is responsible for getting LO ready and dropping off at childcare.

I had my job prior to becoming pregnant and was able to negotiate flexible working because they wanted to keep my expertise. I agree it is very difficult to find any job that fits with school hours, especially a "well paid" one

tethersend Fri 22-Feb-13 09:29:15

OP, is your DH a government adviser? grin

lljkk Fri 22-Feb-13 09:25:25

I am constantly looking at council websites and jobs are never advertised (here anyway) for just 9-3 hours or similar. I've seen a few charity admin posts advertised with vague hours that might be 10-2 (but would have to enquire).

TA in school ONLY works if child is well-behaved and attends same school where you work, if you have relatives to help (like MoreCrack) or you resort to before-after school clubs after all.

I have a long list of jobs I have tried a few times only to firmly establish I'm completely rubbish at them, which includes sales, so Avon not for me.

I disagree about cleaning-care-childcare-sales being non-transferable skills, though, there's a lot that can be transferred.

ChestyLeRoux Thu 21-Feb-13 22:01:50

Erm it says go to the inbox if your on your mobile its at top of screen?

stephcat Thu 21-Feb-13 21:58:48

sorry, its my first time on here - how do you pm me? does it go via mumsnet? or do you need my email address? sorry just not sure how it works yet

ChestyLeRoux Thu 21-Feb-13 21:45:29

Will pm you

stephcat Thu 21-Feb-13 21:44:48

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ChestyLeRoux Thu 21-Feb-13 21:43:21

I work at a nursery with one of my children attending same place,and I have another child at breakfast and afterschool club so maybe between the 2 childcare settings thats a lot of potential customers.Hmm will have a think could be a good idea for extra money toward my holiday smile

stephcat Thu 21-Feb-13 21:38:16

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ChestyLeRoux Thu 21-Feb-13 21:30:09

Stephcat- how have you found doing the avon through the recession? I would quite like to do that on top of my job.

stephcat Thu 21-Feb-13 21:29:54

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stephcat Thu 21-Feb-13 21:28:05

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LadyWidmerpool Thu 21-Feb-13 21:23:21

As a line manager I am certainly not 'not fussed' if a PT member of staff can't come in because of a child's ill health. The work has to be done, is sometimes time-critical and rescheduling can be a real PITA. For example you need to be sure a desk is available. Of course I try to be as accomodating as possible and if a person can't come in they can't come in and it isn't their fault but it does cause issues.

TheDoctrineOfSciAndNatureClub Thu 21-Feb-13 21:22:24

If OP worked in a nursery 8am-6pm, unless it was on the site with the after school club, she'd be late for pick up. She'd also need to take qualifications.

If she worked in an ASC, unless it was her kids' ASC, same problem.

ChestyLeRoux Thu 21-Feb-13 21:13:36

No doctrine I meant nursery or school club,but yeah childminding is also an option.

TheDoctrineOfSciAndNatureClub Thu 21-Feb-13 21:11:48

Childcare where you look after your own children at the same time (I assume you mean childminding) tends to make taking on the entirety of the housework tricky, plus there's some upfront investment in training etc.

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