New job dilemma

[Kirlyovie]

Am in the lucky position of being offered 3 jobs but I can't seem to figure out what I should do & would love anyone to give me some advice. (Apologies in advance, long post)

Background is that I moved abroad and have found it very difficult to get the kind of job and at the same level of responsibility as I had in the UK. Have had a job for the last 2 years, which I haven't particularly enjoyed, but needed to get some experience in the country. Not only was the job not what I would have wanted ideally, the manager turned out to be the worst manager I have ever had - erratic, manipulative, controlling, fundamentally dishonest and selfish. He is also an extremely clever person and can be very charming so most of the time he gets away with behaving as he does.

After about a year, I applied for a job internally to a position that was closer to the one I had in the UK. The manager took this very personally and criticized me during the interview process. To the extent that when the HR lady met me for the 2nd interview, she actually "you're not the person I had been told about" and referred some things my manager had said. None of these criticisms were ever raised at my appraisals before I tried to change jobs. I succeeded in getting a job but due to various changes in the company, 2 departments were merged and with the head count freeze (due to the financial situation) they could only offer me a 25% role in the new dept for 6 months, with a view to moving me over full-time after that. The new manager, HR & my manger's manager agreed to this - but my manager refused to let me go and so the move was cancelled. He said that he didn't think it would work - and I knew that he would make sure it didn't work.

So I stayed & became a lot tougher and eventually turned it round to the point where he couldn't criticize me as everyone knew that I did a good job. Although he still makes my working life at times exhausting & not a lot of fun. So its not a dept that I want to stay in or a manager that I want to work for, and have been through another interview process - hence the 3 jobs.

Job 1 - internal move, in the area I'd like to work in, same money as now, good new manager (I think) BUT I would still have a fair amount of contact with my old manager and he would still be able to influence what I do. I am afraid that he would try to undermine my relationship with my new manager.

Jb 2 - again internal, good manager, little contact with old manager BUT not really the area I want to work in (though better than current role)

Job 3 - external move, completely the area I want to work in, great manager and no contact with old manager BUT far away (would need to buy 2nd car) and less money - perhaps up to 10%. This would put a real strain on our finances.

So I'm in a real dilemma - can anyone help me see straight? How much should I let my fears about this man influence my job choice? Is it more important to have a good working environment or do a job in the area you want to?

Thanks in advance.

[StillSquiffy]

I would go for job 3 if I felt there was an opportunity to get promotion/better pay in near future.

Your option really is which compromise you can live with and I think the financial one would be easier than workign with someone you don't like or in an area that isn't your sweet spot.

the fact that you are in this position means you are impressing people so if it doesn't work out you are in no worse a position and can look again.

[AllarmBelly]

Hi Kirlyovie

I think I would say Job 1.

I can certainly see why you would want to move away from Mad Manager. But, you've done such a great job resisting his attempts to bully you and proving to other colleagues that you are a good person to have on a team and you perform well, it doesn't seem urgent to me that you get away from him.

The question is, how likely is it that he could succesfully manipulate your relationship with the new manager? Sounds as though just one conversation with the HR lady was enough to show her that MM had made unfair criticisms, so wouldn't it also be obvious to the new manager? Could MM be recognised for what he is by other managers as well as by his staff?

If these problems with MM were happening right now it might be worth moving to an area you don't want to work in, or taking a pay cut and adding a commute, but as the situation stands now you sound well able to deal with him.

Good luck - let us know which one you go for!

[Sequins]

I would go for job 3 if it is an investment you can afford to make - if it is a financial strain, is this due to childcare costs? If so, these will get cheaper over time.

[Kirlyovie]

Thanks for your comments - they definitely helped me see clearer. And job 3 upped their salary offer to close to my current salary after some negotiation (hoorah!) so that is the one I have accepted.

Just have to handle MM during my notice period now - he is already causing trouble over the handover of my responsibilities - but only 2 months to go & I am free of him.