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Messy financial denial

(1 Post)
crackerspatel Mon 19-Feb-18 14:03:31

There's so much background on this it would write an essay and I don't want to dripfeed but there's SO much to it, but needless to say one of my parents died, other parent inherited it all, parent then got together with another person (widow/widower) and turns out my parent has been giving them a four figure sum a month for groceries over 8 years. Plus buying a property, a car (in their name but paid for it).

Their partner has pled poverty throughout but turns out they are actually better off in assets and, as it happens cash. Looks like they've been withdrawing the money my parent has given them for housekeeping g as cash and stashing it and sending it to their children via money transfers.

It's all got a bit messy where there's been some hospitalisation of the partner and their family have swooped in and started taking things and rifling through paperwork.

My parent has basically stuck their head in the sand for years and, after prodding and prodding to work out how to move forward (paying for carers etc) it looks like they are completely cleared out financially. Saying they STILL need to give their partner money (despite being housebound) and to go into their overdraft to pay fees (that their partner has meant to have paid).

They are of sound mind but stubborn, depressed and in massive denial.

Partner is currently away from them (thus why we've made progress) but as soon as they are reunited the shutters will come down and I'm sure they will turn parent back against us again.

I'm not really looking for advice as such, but just to vent. It's all such a mess and it looks like me and my sibling are now going to end up being their carers whilst their children do jack.

Can anybody tell me it gets better? My kids are young and the vibes I'm sending out are causing them to act up massively and I've got my own financial issues as well (but funnily enough don't sponge off my parent unlike others). It's all a bit of a mess and my mental health hasn't been great anyway. I'm not sure what to do. sad

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