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My dad talks shite

(7 Posts)
Expemsiveuniform Wed 11-Oct-17 14:55:34

He’s not got dementia. I dint think so anyway. he is 75 and he talks shite.

Complete and utter shite and fairy stories. About stuff that happened when I was growing up that I know didn’t happen as he describes it (factual stuff). There’s not a plane crash or ferry disaster that happened in the UK in the last 50 years that he wasn’t involved in. His car was hijacked and he only just got away by driving like the sweeny. More and more shite and shite.

He is also crap at turn taking in conversations, and has no interest in anyone else at all (not even me or the DC)

He also cannot be disagreed with or he gets exceptionally angry.

Shouting yelling screaming.

Is there a way to deal with this that doesn’t leave me sitting there for hours saying one or two words total?

It isidriving me insane.

Please help or I am going to batter him with the spade and put him under the patio.

(Just about to go to dentist for root canal not ignoring replies)

Expemsiveuniform Wed 11-Oct-17 14:56:17

Please ignore spelling am sitting in car typing on tablet and I have fat fingers. And a sore mouth.

TanteRose Wed 11-Oct-17 15:00:11

Has he always been like this? If it's a sudden (ish) change of personality, it could be some type of dementia.
Sounds very tiring tho

Hope your root canal went okay flowers

RatherBeRiding Wed 11-Oct-17 15:38:55

If it's a significant change from how he was when younger, then don't rule out the onset of dementia even if he appears to be coping otherwise.

If he's always been like it - why are you still visiting and putting up with it? Or if you feel you MUST visit, then as soon as he starts shouting and getting angry, just get up, put on your coat and walk out after telling him that you won't put up with being treated like that.

Or if that's a bit drastic, when he starts losing his temper say that if he continues shouting at you, you will have to leave. Then it's his decision.

Expemsiveuniform Wed 11-Oct-17 18:45:23

Back from dentist. Root canal redone. No pain so far. Hopeful.

He was always an angry man and he’s angrier now my mum is dead.

The idea it just leave is a good one but I’m a chicken.

Spideronabathpuff Wed 11-Oct-17 19:34:56

I’m very sorry to hear about your mum flowers
Excluding medical reasons for his behaviour...(dementia has been mentioned but also UTIs can make people act strangely, this happened to my grandma).
It sounds like your mum was a buffer for his behaviour and now she’s gone he has no filter whatsoever.
He sounds angry yes but I wonder if he’s also afraid, more so since the loss of your mum.
Why would someone tell tall tales? Because reality is painful? Because he’s afraid you’ll find him boring and lose interest? Is it better to rewrite history than face sadness and regrets? Is it a coping mechanism?
I’m not sure why he does it but you need to get to the bottom of this with him.
Also I hope you recover quickly from your dental surgery!

RatherBeRiding Thu 12-Oct-17 10:58:31

I get it can take a certain level of assertiveness to just get up, put on your coat and leave but the alternative is to continue enabling his angry and aggressive behaviour. Why should you be shouted at?

As soon as his temper starts to flair up simply say, quietly and calmly but very firmly, "I don't like it when you shout at me. If you carry on I will have to leave." Then just do it.

First time will be the worst, but it might make him realise what he is doing.

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