My dad keeps on locking himself out of his online banking

[Noitsnotteatimeyet]

He's 90, has very restricted mobility so is housebound and is getting increasingly forgetful and confused. Until fairly recently he was coping ok with his finances and as he cant get out and about, online banking was a boon.

However in the last couple of months he's been getting increasingly forgetful and he keeps forgetting how to log in to his account. Of course once he puts in the wrong info a few times he gets locked out. He can't call them to get himself back in as he's virtually completely deaf and can't use the phone.

My sister and I have third party mandate but the bank still insists on talking to him when we call so one of us has to be sitting next to him at the time which isn't always practical...

Has anyone had a similar problem and if so, how did you solve it?

[whataboutbob]

Sorry to be a bit pessimistic- but if at 90 he is starting to lock himself out of online banking (and kudos to him for managing it for this long) it might be time to look at other ways of banking for him, eg popping round once in a while to help him, or even better, someone getting Power of Attorney and helping him manage his affairs. With POA you can deal with absolutely everyone and he doesn't have to be sitting next to you to give his agreement. I have POA for my Dad, and would have been in an absolute bind without it- but he does have dementia. But still very useful to have even if yours doesn t have dementia, but is increasingly frail and a little forgetful.

[CMOTDibbler]

My parents had online banking, but mum was the one who had dealt with it and when she couldn't remember it all, dad couldn't cope. The bank transferred them onto a branch account, I helped dad get all their bills onto direct debit and so he just needs cash for day to day - I do any online shopping for him. Its also safer - there are so many scams targeted at the elderly now.

I agree with Bob about it being time to get a POA - its a great peace of mind to know you can do what needs to be done

[Noitsnotteatimeyet]

Thanks - I suspect you're right and that POA is the way to go but persuading him he needs it is going to be tricky ..,

[Noitsnotteatimeyet]

Oh and there's someone with him every day - I'm usually there twice a week and we've got a combination of me and my sisters, neighbours, his cleaner etc all going into see him and help with stuff - it's just if he decides he wants to do a transfer it's usually not when I'm right next to him ...

[Icequeen01]

My mum is not quite as elderly as your father but is 76 and totally computer illiterate so I'm so impressed that your father is able to use online banking!

I have to do all my mum's online banking for her. She tells me who she wants to pay etc and I do it for her from my computer. I don't have a POA for her (but something she wants us to do soon whilst she is still healthy and sound of mind).

My DH and I have POA for his mother and father and had to take on all the financial side of his father's affairs up until he sadly died. Now DH's mother is in a care home and not sound of mind bless her so DH now looks after her financial affairs too. We have had to rent out her house to pay for the huge care costs hence another reason why he has to have access to her bank.

[whataboutbob]

With my Dad there was a lot of pride involved, he was not managing his affairs anymore but would never have admitted it. I shamelessly sweet talked him and had no compunctions as I knew I was doing it for his own benefit. I told him he was of course managing brilliantly, but we should do it "just in case", it was not to remove powers from him but just to add some to me, etc etc. He signed after a bit of dithering. I find that as people loose competence they are less and less likely to admit they are losing it, or to consider that help might be needed, so now is probably a good time to go for it. Sorry that it will add to your to do list in the short term, but it can save you a mountain of hassles later.

[tribpot]

What does he use online banking for? Would he be better off on the bank's mobile app? Less functionality but more likely to be secured by a fingerprint or similar (no-one forgets their fingerprint!).

Alternatively you could use a password manager like Keeper or LastPass, that's what I use to keep track of my passwords. For banking you often still need to be able to input additional bits of info (first school attending, numbers from a passcode) but he could store all the necessary info in the vault and look at it whilst filling in the details.

He may also be able to use textphone to talk to the bank - info here from Lloyds, for example.

[Noitsnotteatimeyet]

Thanks - He refuses to use a mobile phone - he got rid of his years ago, and won't use the iPad we bought him a couple of years ago. And he's very reluctant to consider the idea of a textphone - I think it'd be too fiddly for him anyway

I'm going to go into the bank today and discuss possible solutions with them

[maisiejones]

I do all my dad's banking online and have never ever informed the bank. They must assume that it's him doing it.